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Clips from Scrubs - My Intern's Eyes (S05E05)

"[J.D.] Since my apartment's roof collapsed, I was living at a hotel."
Scrubs
"But that's not the only thing that's changed around here."
Scrubs
"- I'm an attending, a licensed badass. - [Horn honks]"
Scrubs
"Elliot actually works at a different hospital."
Scrubs
"She's trying to lay low at first."
Scrubs
"And Turk and Carla are trying to make a baby."
Scrubs
"I know you love foreplay, but I have five minutes,"
Scrubs
"Yep! Life was different."
Scrubs
"Hey! Did you take my Porsche from the valet?"
Scrubs
"Fine, here's your driving sock."
Scrubs
"I had picked out a whole new look."
Scrubs
"What, Tall, Dark and Scary? I can wear whatever the hell I..."
Scrubs
"When it starts blinking, a situation has ten seconds to resolve itself"
Scrubs
"- It'll happen. - Ow."
Scrubs
"OK, I'm gonna... I'm gonna go with "ow.""
Scrubs
"Would you equate it more to being a Cub fan,"
Scrubs
"- His house just burned down. - How sad."
Scrubs
"I have new interns starting. Can you imagine what it's like"
Scrubs
"It's free in private... [purrs]"
Scrubs
"- Who am I? - [J.D. Groans]"
Scrubs
"I found him."
Scrubs
"# I can't do this all on my own"
Scrubs
"# I'm no Superman #"
Scrubs
"Someone's close enough for a hair-mussing."
Scrubs
"- No problem. - Good work, buddy. Stay in school."
Scrubs
"Humor is a great icebreaker for patients, OK? Follow me."
Scrubs
"- See, in 1492, Columbus... - [Cox] Newbie!"
Scrubs
"I love interns. Gentlemen, a reminder:"
Scrubs
"I'm not planning on doing any paperwork."
Scrubs
"I did go ahead and leave my urine sample on your driver's-side car door."
Scrubs
"I turned in my paperwork already, but I'm gonna wait till tomorrow"
Scrubs
"Feel my shoulder, it's warm."
Scrubs
"Lindsay, by you reaching the level of attending physician,"
Scrubs
"Obviously there was no vote. Because if there had been,"
Scrubs
"I'm going to take one from you."
Scrubs
"Carla was psyched to get rid of me. Are you gonna tell?"
Scrubs
"I don't know. What do you think?"
Scrubs
"- Turk? Is that you? - [Thud, backpack zips]"
Scrubs
"Look, I gotta sex her up. I'll be back as quick as I can,"
Scrubs
"Ahh. Ooh."
Scrubs
"- [Struggling] - [Thud]"
Scrubs
"Not you, Omar. I love your people."
Scrubs
"Uh."
Scrubs
"You could totally reinvent yourself."
Scrubs
"who never needs anyone's help with anything!"
Scrubs
"Oh, Jason, when you're filling out a female patient's exam report,"
Scrubs
"her breasts can be "healthy" or "unhealthy," never "bangin' double-Ds.""
Scrubs
"Dorian, I'm paying you to work, not stand around acting like the Fonz."
Scrubs
"Being Turk's secret roommate was going great..."
Scrubs
"Don't forget to use the Glade!"
Scrubs
"All this baby stuff, I feel like she rushed me into it."
Scrubs
"Stop running!"
Scrubs
"Be right back."
Scrubs
"[Gasps]"
Scrubs
"I'm on a fellowship now. Foley cath, please."
Scrubs
"Frick fricky frick frick!"
Scrubs
"Nice ass, grandma!"
Scrubs
"That screaming patient would have to wait. I had bigger problems."
Scrubs
"Hey, Keith! I just called upstairs to see how Mr. Kellerman was doing."
Scrubs
"That's why I'm glad you work here, sweetheart."
Scrubs
"As for me, I caught my culprit because he made the classic mistake"
Scrubs
"- Thank you! - Damn it!"
Scrubs
"Long day."
Scrubs
"- Bye, Elliot. - Look..."
Scrubs
"You should've let her fork me!"
Scrubs
"Euphemism five!"
Scrubs
"- Elliot, why are you here? - Oh, I have to make Kelso think"
Scrubs
""Oh, baby, we're going all night. No, wait, don't move!"
Scrubs
"- Hey. - Thank you."
Scrubs
"- Yep. - I've been thinking about"
Scrubs
"- Then why didn't you tell me? - Because you're an attending now."
Scrubs
"That doesn't just mean a fat bank account, expensive new toys"
Scrubs
"But now, the only way for you to stay out of the trouble storm"
Scrubs
"what type of attending you're gonna be."
Scrubs
"You know what? This is my last one. Here, take it."
Scrubs
"and I was sneaking out in my undies"
Scrubs
"because he likes to call me his "honky Adonis." And that's what friends do."
Scrubs
"They bought it? Are we that gay?"
Scrubs
"- What's that? - Oh, that's my new driving sock."
Scrubs
"How am I to tell you I'm not ready to have a baby when you're excited?"
Scrubs
"Still, let me ask you something. Why are you three so afraid of moving on?"
Scrubs
"You're still eating those brownies!"
Scrubs
"Nothing. But now I need to know,"
Scrubs
"is this the type of attending you're going to be?"
Scrubs
"- I guess so. - Anything else?"
Scrubs
"I could tell him there's nothing in my cup and I'm pretending to drink"
Scrubs
"- I hate this place. - It hates you, Bob."
Scrubs
"That's it. All my birth control pills are gone."
Scrubs
"is not only fat-free, but it's baby-free."
Scrubs
"I just don't get it, Turk."
Scrubs
"Dr. Cox says it's like having a dog that slowly learns how to talk."
Scrubs
"Awesome!"
Scrubs
"Right? And I come from a big family, and I love that."
Scrubs
"- J.D.! - Gotta make a quick twosie."
Scrubs
"Thanks for nothin', ass-face."
Scrubs
"I'm gonna go ahead and give you back one of these man cards. You deserve it."
Scrubs
"Wow. Wanna hug?"
Scrubs
"I'm gonna have a good year, aren't I?"
Scrubs
"Dr. Reid, are you joining us for lunch today?"
Scrubs
"...very tall boy. ...very tall boy."
Scrubs
"Hey, keep your head up, you're doing a good job."
Scrubs
"- [Squeaks down rail] - [Yells]"
Scrubs
"- [Screams] - [Thud]"
Scrubs
"so I made you a sandwich."
Scrubs
"That's the sexiest thing I've ever seen."
Scrubs
"- Over here, Turk. - My bad, baby."
Scrubs
"This didn't feel like my scooter."
Scrubs
"Ow!"
Scrubs
"here's your driving scarf and here are your driving gloves."
Scrubs
"- Good morning, colleague. - Oh, absolutely not."
Scrubs
"- What are you doing? - This is my imaginary warning light."
Scrubs
"before I flash white with rage and kill someone."
Scrubs
"One, two, three, four..."
Scrubs
"...seven, eight, nine and ten."
Scrubs
"I had trouble getting my babyGap T-shirt off."
Scrubs
"How depressing is it being you? Seriously."
Scrubs
"He was smoking in bed. He shouldn't smoke, 'cause he looks ridiculous."
Scrubs
"to see this place through their eyes the first time?"
Scrubs
"- Something on your shirt, kid. - Huh? Oh."
Scrubs
"You're gonna love it here, sport."
Scrubs
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