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Clips from Seinfeld - The Parking Garage (S03E03)

"...you still don't really know, sometimes, which way to walk..."
Seinfeld
"...for my living room. This was a waste of time."
Seinfeld
"You should see what my father used to do before he bought a new car."
Seinfeld
"We'd get phone calls from New Hampshire."
Seinfeld
"Oh, big accomplishment."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, what time do you have?"
Seinfeld
"I have 5:00."
Seinfeld
"- But it's Saturday. - You got the picnic and burger traffic."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, this is great. - Look, I thought it was Green 22."
Seinfeld
"I remember Orange. I thought it was Orange."
Seinfeld
"I'm sure it's right around here."
Seinfeld
"There it is."
Seinfeld
"You better find this car."
Seinfeld
"You hold it in like that, you can cause a lot of damage to your bladder."
Seinfeld
"- ...it starts to come out involuntarily. - All right."
Seinfeld
"...they're gonna put me on an aggravation instalment plan..."
Seinfeld
"...that will compound, with interest, for decades."
Seinfeld
"Make sure you hang on to your jacket."
Seinfeld
"You should always bring a pad and a pen."
Seinfeld
"I can't carry a pen. I'm afraid I'll puncture my scrotum."
Seinfeld
"From now on, no more calling out I found it unless we're sitting in it."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, look at my fish."
Seinfeld
"Oh, those are your eyes."
Seinfeld
"I thought you knew this mall."
Seinfeld
"- You said you'd been here. - It was easy last time."
Seinfeld
"No one's gonna do that."
Seinfeld
"...to drive us around the garage for five minutes so we can look."
Seinfeld
"- All right, all right. - Hey, you can go over here."
Seinfeld
"I have no control over it."
Seinfeld
"...I could die."
Seinfeld
"- That's up to you. - Oh, so you don't care if I die."
Seinfeld
"What I care about is the sanitary condition of the parking facility."
Seinfeld
"Jerry!"
Seinfeld
"It's like a science-fiction story."
Seinfeld
"...we'll find the car, Jerry will show up and we'll never find you!"
Seinfeld
"That's for starters."
Seinfeld
"I had a bottle of very tepid water and I poured it out."
Seinfeld
"I could see how you made a mistake..."
Seinfeld
"Well, wouldn't you get any satisfaction out of helping someone out?"
Seinfeld
"I said crazy things, I obviously offended you..."
Seinfeld
"...I made all that up."
Seinfeld
"Their 47th wedding anniversary."
Seinfeld
"They're meeting me in front of my building at 6: 15."
Seinfeld
"I mean, the guy had a fat fetish."
Seinfeld
"Why don't you just go."
Seinfeld
"George!"
Seinfeld
"- Should I? Should I do it? - Teach him a lesson he'll never forget."
Seinfeld
"Sorry."
Seinfeld
"That's right, go."
Seinfeld
"Go work on your pecs and your lats. We're all really impressed."
Seinfeld
"Look at the time. All right, that's it."
Seinfeld
"Thank you. Thank you."
Seinfeld
"It's a brown Ford."
Seinfeld
"I'll say."
Seinfeld
"I knew it. I knew this would happen."
Seinfeld
"I could have used you."
Seinfeld
"Sometimes it's good to write those things down."
Seinfeld
"Oh, boy."
Seinfeld
"See, the problem with the mall garage..."
Seinfeld
"It's hard to find a store in a mall. They have a directory..."
Seinfeld
"...but the problem with it is, even if you figure out where you are..."
Seinfeld
"...and where you wanna go..."
Seinfeld
"...because it's an upright map."
Seinfeld
"If you had, like, suction-cup feet, then you could just walk right up on it."
Seinfeld
"Then you could tell, you could be on it going, All right, I'm here."
Seinfeld
"I wanna go to the Gap. That's down there."
Seinfeld
"All right, I'll just walk that way."
Seinfeld
"But people would know. They would see you walking down the mall going:"
Seinfeld
"I heard about that guy. He's never lost."
Seinfeld
"One left. What a joke."
Seinfeld
"- You can have this one. - That's not enough BTUs..."
Seinfeld
"I didn't get one either."
Seinfeld
"Why do I always have the feeling..."
Seinfeld
"...everybody's doing something better than me on Saturdays?"
Seinfeld
"- This is what people do. - No, they don't."
Seinfeld
"They're out on some big picnic, they're cooking burgers..."
Seinfeld
"...making out on blankets."
Seinfeld
"They're not at some mall in Jersey..."
Seinfeld
"...watching their friends trying to find the world's cheapest air conditioner."
Seinfeld
"He'd go from state to state. He was away for weeks at a time."
Seinfeld
"Like he's running for president and going through the primaries."
Seinfeld
"We took a little ride, what's the big deal?"
Seinfeld
"At least you accomplished something. You got fish."
Seinfeld
"Fish. What do they do?"
Seinfeld
"- What do you do? - Hey, this way!"
Seinfeld
"- Always late. Always late. - You're not late."
Seinfeld
"I told them to meet me in front of my building at 6: 15."
Seinfeld
"- Who? - My parents. It's their anniversary."
Seinfeld
"I'm taking them out to dinner and a show tonight."
Seinfeld
"- Think we'll hit traffic? - Of course. It's rush hour."
Seinfeld
"- Isn't it the other way? - There's no other way."
Seinfeld
"Everybody goes every way all the time."
Seinfeld
"- There's picnic traffic? - As my grandfather used to say:"
Seinfeld
"Sometimes even a picnic's no picnic."
Seinfeld
"I always get myself in this position. Can't be on time. Gotta rush."
Seinfeld
"What's the matter?"
Seinfeld
"I have to go to the bathroom."
Seinfeld
"Why do they hide the bathrooms in these malls?"
Seinfeld
"- You want me to help you with that? - No, I got it."
Seinfeld
"Did I need that pointed out for me?"
Seinfeld
"What is that gonna do for me? How does that help me, to see her?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah, women love to get approached in parking garages."
Seinfeld
"I'll go up and say, Hi, how you doing? Would you like a glass of white wine?"
Seinfeld
"You get within 15 feet, she'd have her finger on the Mace button."
Seinfeld
"That was a guy."
Seinfeld
"- That was a guy? - Where's the car?"
Seinfeld
"Well, I thought it was here."
Seinfeld
"You don't know where we parked?"
Seinfeld
"- I didn't pay attention. - This is just what I need."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, it looks familiar. I remember the elevator."
Seinfeld
"There's elevators all over! Everything looks the same!"
Seinfeld
"We're like rats in some experiment."
Seinfeld
"It's over there. I know where it is."
Seinfeld
"- It's black, right? - Well, it's dark brown."
Seinfeld
"In a parking lot, you write it down. How hard is that?"
Seinfeld
"No, no."
Seinfeld
"That's a Toyota."
Seinfeld
"- I thought it was... - Hey, didn't we come in over there?"
Seinfeld
"I thought we came in over there."
Seinfeld
"How long can fish live in one of these plastic bags?"
Seinfeld
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