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Clips from Schitt's Creek (2015) - The Hospies (S05E05)

"Well, for what it's worth, Alexis,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I always thought "Hampton's Hoes""
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"You look very nice."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"- No, I don't. - Uh, yes, you do!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I've had it forever."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"You know it's not a bad thing to admit"
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"you really care about these awards, Stevie."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"You're bringing a bag?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"You know, I almost brought a change of clothes myself."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Moira told me to pack a second suit"
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"for the after-party, but uh,"
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"who am I, George Clooney?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"No, Mr. Rose, that's a weekend bag."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I'm going away for the weekend."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Oh."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I told you I'm taking Monday off!"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Yeah, but I didn't know you were going someplace."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Uh, Emir is presenting at the awards,"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Oh... so it sounds like you two are getting..."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"pretty serious?"
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"Uh, I guess we'll see what happens this weekend."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"Look at us! Who are we?"
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"Brad Pitt and his handsome brother?"
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"Why the jacket, Roland?"
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"You know you're not going to the awards."
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"Johnny, you asked me to manage the motel"
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"while you were away."
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"like some schlub off the street!"
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"Like you do every day?"
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"Wow, okay. This one puts on a dress"
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"workplace banter."
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"- We are coming back, Roland. - Oh."
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"At least I'm coming back, I don't know about Stevie."
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"Oh my God, we should really get going."
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"Roland: Great idea, okay."
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"Stevie, do you mind?"
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"Here we go."
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"Absolutely, no, that makes perfect sense."
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"Okay."
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"And everybody..."
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"I just don't get the big reveal, it's a bathroom."
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"It's not just a bathroom, David, it's a passion project."
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"that you've now decided to open up"
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"to the entire town."
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"Yeah well, we can't afford to keep a private bathroom,"
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"David, we're losing customers to the cafe."
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"Besides, you're the one who started serving booze"
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"Um, those evening events are part of a summer series."
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"- Oh... - We sold 30 dreamcatchers"
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"Yeah, you know what? You were right."
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"It does look beautiful."
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"- What the f... - So, I'm confused."
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"Where does the bathroom start,"
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"and all this garbage end?"
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"Ronnie swore this would be done today."
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"Ronnie: Yep, but you ran out of tiles."
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"It doesn't help that you picked the most expensive ones."
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"Okay, you asked for my opinion,"
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"I don't know how much Romanian marble costs!"
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"I was hoping to get my hands on a few more"
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"in an hour or so, but that is TBC at this point."
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"Okay, Ronnie, uh, this installation"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"was just supposed to last two days."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"And now half of our store is covered in tarps,"
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"and David's organized some writers' retreat"
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"We're working as fast as we can,"
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"you have my cell!"
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"I mean, there's green tape everywhere!"
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"The tarps aren't staying up, David."
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"This bathroom's getting finished today,"
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"because that's what we discussed,"
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"it's just that you waited until after she left"
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"if she's aware of that plan."
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"She obviously thinks we're a couple of pushovers."
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"Okay, speak for yourself."
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"All I did was pick out some gorgeous tile."
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"I'm pregnant."
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"That's it, that's the end of my audition."
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"- Indeed it is. - I'm fine with nudity."
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"Not necessary."
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"Thank you."
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"She looks like she may have seen the inside"
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"of a smoky German bar or two."
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"Who knows, a haircut, some dance lessons..."
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"Moira, I feel like we're really scraping"
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"I think that we should bring Alexis in."
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"Jabberwocky! There are still stones left unturned!"
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"Okay, you're actively trying to prevent"
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"in the middle of some mother daughter competition thing,"
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"Competition! Nothing of the sort."
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"No, Alexis just doesn't have the..."
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"- life experience. - Really?"
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"Well, she's had her fair share of adventures, yes."
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"But the role of Sally Bowles requires an actress"
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"A woman encumbered with secrets she will..."
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"take with her to the tomb."
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"received for the role."
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"You know what, Moira?"
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"I'm gonna bring Alexis in."
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"And don't worry, I will handle the audition,"
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"so it is less of a struggle for you."
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"Fine, you're on your own."
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"Boy, it looks like"
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""Best Customer Service in a Motel Under 20 Units""
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"is up fifth, that's the big one."
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"- Okay. - Yeah."
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"Stevie, if we win, and I know that's a big "if,""
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"do you think you'll be doing any talking up there?"
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"- It's all you, Mr. Rose. - Okay."
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"Excuse me, is this the children's table?"
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"Young at heart, maybe."
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"Johnny Rose, but I'm sure you remember me, Emir,"
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"You declared our motel a "must stay"."
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"How could I forget, Mr. Rose, good to see you."
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"And you are?"
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"Uh, I'm just waiting for my date."
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"So that seat's taken."
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"Oh, well, can I uh... buy you a drink while you wait?"
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"I guess, but he won't be too happy about it."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
"From what I've heard, he'll take what he can get."
Schitt's Creek (2015)
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