You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from Archer - Bel Panto: Part II (S07E07)

"[huffs]"
Archer
"Son of a... bitch-ass clown!"
Archer
"I swear to God, one more word out of you,"
Archer
"and you'll... have to have your brain's"
Archer
"mail forwarded to the ceiling!"
Archer
"But first I gotta figure out which"
Archer
"one of these scrote-licks is him."
Archer
"And then, boom, we're outta here."
Archer
"And then Veronica Deane's like,"
Archer
"And then she swoons, and I catch"
Archer
"her, and there is a moment, and..."
Archer
"Yeah, well, so does barging in there"
Archer
"- Knockout gas. - Yeah."
Archer
"Yeah, we just freeze 'em into giant"
Archer
"icicles and hit 'em with a hammer."
Archer
"Son of a... Could've sworn this"
Archer
"hallway led back to the foyer."
Archer
"Or maybe the dining room?"
Archer
"How the hell did I get so turned around?"
Archer
"Oh, and bigger question:"
Archer
"how the hell am I gonna tell which clown is Archer?"
Archer
"You didn't think about that, did ya, Poovey?"
Archer
"knockout gas was an actual thing."
Archer
"Idiot. Some kind of drug, maybe, but..."
Archer
"- [gasps] - [gasps] No, no, no, not the phone!"
Archer
"Listen, I bet you guys are getting"
Archer
"pretty hungry in there again, huh?"
Archer
"Uh, is he joking?"
Archer
"And speaking of, where is Pam?"
Archer
"So, what say we, uh, send in some"
Archer
"more hot pizzas? What do ya say?"
Archer
"- [phone ringing] - [gasps] I bet that's them!"
Archer
"[ringing continues]"
Archer
"Uh-huh. Uh-huh."
Archer
"And that even if they did want pizza"
Archer
"for the hostages, which they don't,"
Archer
"the perps wouldn't eat it 'cause they"
Archer
"- [gasps] What about calzones? - [snaps fingers]"
Archer
"- [horn blaring] - Ow! Come on!"
Archer
"I don't think his problem was with the food shape."
Archer
"Okay. All right. Did I, or did I not, let you drive?"
Archer
"[sighs] Okay, cowboy, let's do it your way."
Archer
"I'm sorry, boss. We just can't find her."
Archer
"Or Pinky or Giggles or Yum-Yum,"
Archer
"this place is on lockdown."
Archer
"find his way off a sinking ship?"
Archer
"I think that's mostly via ropes?"
Archer
"into the icy black waters of failure."
Archer
"For though mightily I toil and strive,"
Archer
"the Tsarina shall not be mine."
Archer
"So, uh, what do we do now?"
Archer
"Uh... [chuckles nervously] w-what's Plan X?"
Archer
"Oh, for..."
Archer
"Eat a dick, mansion."
Archer
"Said the spider to the... clown."
Archer
"[sighs] What, did I walk onto the Titan..."
Archer
"be Archer and a bad guy!"
Archer
"wait... or both?"
Archer
"and then apologize to one of 'em?"
Archer
"- [screaming] - [both groan]"
Archer
"[Pam, Lana] Goddamn it!"
Archer
"is the one who made out with Veronica Deane!"
Archer
"Hey, first of all, she kissed me. I didn't kiss her."
Archer
"But even if I did kiss her, which I didn't,"
Archer
"- He was flirting with me! - Oh, my God!"
Archer
"I wish I'd blown off both of you guys's kneecaps."
Archer
"- Jesus. - Not cool, Pam."
Archer
"Oh, eat my asshole!"
Archer
"Now what are we gonna do about the hostage situation?"
Archer
"[Archer, Lana] Oh, right."
Archer
"All right. My guys are in position"
Archer
"Well, sir, I think, technically, you."
Archer
"- But this guy's been calling the shots. - What?"
Archer
"Yeah. So, uh, yeah. We'll just leave you to it."
Archer
"Don't shoot! Don't shoot!"
Archer
"[quietly] You really think this is gonna work?"
Archer
"Mm, nope. Just those hideous clowns."
Archer
"[Cyril] We're gonna die, we're gonna"
Archer
"die, we're gonna die, we're gonna die..."
Archer
"and then they're gonna shoot"
Archer
"us, and we're gonna die!"
Archer
"[sobbing] We're gonna die! We're gonna die..."
Archer
"♪ ♪"
Archer
"Go, go, go, go, go!"
Archer
"[distorted] Oh, no!"
Archer
"[distorted shouting]"
Archer
"No, no, no, no!"
Archer
"[distorted grunting]"
Archer
"No!"
Archer
"[distorted groaning]"
Archer
"[distorted] This was my..."
Archer
"third best birthday. [groans]"
Archer
"- If anything. - Well, for starters, beanbags."
Archer
"Oh, thank God, he's right about something."
Archer
"Or horseshoes."
Archer
"- Note to self... - [group] Krieger!"
Archer
"What? That was an unrelated note to self!"
Archer
"presenting him with an itemized bill."
Archer
"[Shapiro] But you must realize, Mr. Archer,"
Archer
"Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot. It's opposite day."
Archer
"[gasps] But h-how did you know?"
Archer
"Oh, damn it!"
Archer
"- [laughs] - She's broke."
Archer
"She can't eat a bunch of diamonds and emeralds."
Archer
"Old clients of mine. I got 'em out of jail,"
Archer
"- And now I bet they're gonna kill me! - Yeah, probably."
Archer
"I mean, like, four million."
Archer
"And you were gonna pay the clowns, so you didn't have to worry"
Archer
"- I don't know. Have you got Krugerrands? - I mean..."
Archer
"- Which... - you let me know."
Archer
"Did she... [laughing]"
Archer
"She..."
Archer
"[sighs]"
Archer
"Whew! No."
Archer
"There's a nice way to do that."
Archer
"Why would she be in the refrigerator?"
Archer
"You just went!"
Archer
"No, it was..."
Archer
"Where are you, Veronica Deane?"
Archer
"That's the good news."
Archer
Show more clips