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Clips from The Odd Couple - Enlightening Strikes (S01E01)

"and some moron in a hot dog suit"
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"shoves a flier in my face."
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"He's a very persistent wiener."
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"Anyway, I finally take it and throw it in the trash,"
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"it just falls off the top of this trash mountain"
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"and lands in the street."
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"I get a ticket for littering,"
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"and the hot dog goes free."
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"Nothing? You're in that bad of a mood?"
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"I'm just so sick of New York."
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"You know what I'm gonna do?"
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"I'm gonna move into a cabin in the woods."
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"You say that every few months."
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"I mean it this time."
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"I'm through with this city."
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"is an uplifting urban experience,"
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"so help me God..."
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"No, no, of course not."
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"Not when the swans are breeding."
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""If you know so much about yoga, why don't you teach the class?""
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"I like this Dante."
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"Yes, that's the problem; everyone does."
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"He can't be a good teacher"
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"So, what do you say?"
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"Well, let me think it over for a second. No."
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"Oscar, your loss."
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"I really, really wish you would expose yourself to new things."
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"I've been getting offers to do endorsements and stuff,"
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"and since you do such great work for Oscar,"
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"I was hoping you could represent me."
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"to endorse a new sports supplement."
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"...enhance your performance"
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"- Okay, we're gonna get you an acting coach. - Right."
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"But if this stuff makes me look like you,"
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"I'll take some right now."
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"Well, it's medicine, Teddy."
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"It's not magic."
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"Hey, I only take crap like that from clients."
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"Magic, that's hilarious."
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"Again?"
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"What can I get for you?"
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"Oh, great."
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"You're all at the bar..."
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"bright and early."
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"I will be teaching a yoga class tomorrow,"
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"and I would love it if you could all make it."
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"Yeah, yoga's not really my thing."
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"Guys, yoga changed my life."
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"You might be surprised to know this, but when I was"
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"going through my divorce, I was a bit of a wreck."
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"face my demons and emerge a calmer, stronger man"
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"ready to let go of my marriage"
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"Really? You're moving on?"
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"Like, dating and all that?"
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"I mean, you never actually said dating,"
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"but I think that we all just assumed."
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"I mean, you're a human with needs and desires."
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"Yes to yoga."
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"Great, Emily's in."
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"I did a little yoga..."
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"Well, my wife wants me to stay home"
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"so I'd say yes to an hour of being punched in the face."
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"Just grab me and go for it."
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"It's been a long time since I was..."
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"Run, Oscar, move your skinny ass."
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"I got to quit smoking."
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"You don't smoke."
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"you have to walk into that courtroom with respect."
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"Keep a positive attitude."
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"Just a little ray of sunshine, aren't you?"
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"We have a winner in the subway smell contest."
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"Who made you king of the subway?"
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"You just spit vindaloo all over my shirt."
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"Oscar, calm down."
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"How long are we talking here, half an hour?"
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"Well, the flier said 90 minutes."
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"With a nap in the middle?"
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"I'm gonna need some of those endurance pills."
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"How many should I take?"
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"Let's see, uh,"
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"between fjorten and, uh, keveld."
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"So, you just did your hair and makeup."
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"No heels?"
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"Shut up."
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"Was it a meeting with your john?"
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"Have you guys seen Felix?"
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"Class should be starting."
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"It's not like him to be..."
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"on a voyage of self-discovery."
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"Please welcome your spiritual captain..."
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"Okay, Dante is at his cousin's commitment ceremony in Paramus."
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"So I have the privilege of teaching you today."
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"Now,"
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"as some of you may know, I recently went"
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"through a pretty painful divorce,"
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"but it was yoga that got me through it."
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"let me release my anger"
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"and become the totally centered man"
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"you see before you today."
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"It's my belief that you haven't really practiced yoga"
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"unless you've had a cathartic emotional breakthrough."
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"So hold on to your chakras,"
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"'cause it's about to get namaste-y up in here."
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"We will dive in with a pose that tests"
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"aka the human pretzel."
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"Okay, Steve, as we've established,"
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"Joke's on him."
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"Sorry for the inconvenience."
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"We are..."
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"...electrical fire..."
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"...up to 30 to..."
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"Well, that clears that up."
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"Looks like you're gonna miss your court date."
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"So I'm gonna have to pay the fine?"
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"Thanks, New York."
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"but it doesn't mean I want to hang out with it."
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"Me, growing up in Ohio,"
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"I used to see New York in movies and on television."
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"I remember the first time I saw that Billy Joel video."
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"Now I'm living that video."
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