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Clips from Scrubs - My Night to Remember (S06E06)

"I know your shifts are over and you're all excited about going home,"
Scrubs
"Debbie, what are the neoplastic causes of hyperprolactinemia?"
Scrubs
"Uh, ectopic tumor production secondary to renal carcinoma?"
Scrubs
"Close, but no ciggie."
Scrubs
"- No. - Correct."
Scrubs
"This is good."
Scrubs
"Crash cart to bed three, stat!"
Scrubs
"We got you. He's not really dying."
Scrubs
"I made a device that makes the sound of a flatline."
Scrubs
"I use that on people who are sensitive about their weight."
Scrubs
"- That's easy. - Besides an elephant's penis."
Scrubs
"Whale's blowhole."
Scrubs
"Man, there's no milk for my coffee."
Scrubs
"Welcome. You know what would go great with that coffee?"
Scrubs
"(SCREAMING)"
Scrubs
"- Turkey bacon. - Yeah."
Scrubs
"Let's go, people. Lend a hand."
Scrubs
"I'm hiring a trainer, damn it."
Scrubs
"(INAUDIBLE)"
Scrubs
"we'd refer to you as a John Doe, but I think that's so impersonal."
Scrubs
"What did he say when you told him he tried to commit suicide?"
Scrubs
"Hell, maybe we should never tell him."
Scrubs
"(EXCLAIMING)"
Scrubs
"(YELLING)"
Scrubs
"That's odd."
Scrubs
"(EXCLAIMING)"
Scrubs
"No, just the bad stuff,"
Scrubs
"after testing out his new homemade sex lube."
Scrubs
"The Fray is always playing."
Scrubs
"Where was I?"
Scrubs
"If you're referring to the game "Find the saltine," relax."
Scrubs
"You know why?"
Scrubs
"It's not because I have the name Johnny tattooed on my butt."
Scrubs
"- Have you been drinking? - I'm not drunk."
Scrubs
"Hey, those nuts are for my brother. Please don't eat them all."
Scrubs
"Are you watching Sesame Street?"
Scrubs
"You know, when I was a kid, I had my first sex dream about Mr. Hooper."
Scrubs
"At least I think it was a sex dream. He was trying to choke me."
Scrubs
"that can erase stuff from your head, like memories, dreams..."
Scrubs
"Baby, don't worry, you have nothing to be threatened by."
Scrubs
"Well, I know one person who's not down with erasing dreams, right, J.D.?"
Scrubs
"Holy inferiority complex, Batman,"
Scrubs
"how low is my self-esteem that I'm the sidekick in my own fantasy?"
Scrubs
"Is it hot in here? It's, like... It's hot."
Scrubs
"(TRUCK HONKING)"
Scrubs
"Whack a Newbie! Whack, whack! Damn!"
Scrubs
"Missed me!"
Scrubs
"J.D.!"
Scrubs
"Unfortunately, he was up and had a question."
Scrubs
"yes or no?"
Scrubs
"- What? - Well, it's a new game."
Scrubs
"Yes or no?"
Scrubs
"- No. - Wrong."
Scrubs
"some jackass with a wall on which to lean against and reflect"
Scrubs
"on what a jackass he truly is."
Scrubs
"Hey, come here a sec. We wanna do stuff to you."
Scrubs
"Do you know how I know that this is yours, Farah?"
Scrubs
"Mary?"
Scrubs
"My gal Friday."
Scrubs
"It's short for Sandra."
Scrubs
"Murder, She Wrote."
Scrubs
"Oh, I wouldn't have room for it anyway"
Scrubs
"Janitor, have you ever looked at yourself"
Scrubs
"Does this shade of red make me look like a clown?"
Scrubs
"It makes you look like a prostitute who caters exclusively to clowns."
Scrubs
"- You're a jerk. - You're a jerk."
Scrubs
"You are now."
Scrubs
"I'll go do it."
Scrubs
"the joyful ones and the heartbreaking ones,"
Scrubs
"that make up who you are as a person."
Scrubs
"(SIGHING)"
Scrubs
"but a more successful you."
Scrubs
"- Are you crying? - No."
Scrubs
"I mean, you try going from out-of-control horny"
Scrubs
"to clinically depressed six times a day."
Scrubs
"Look, man, it was one second of doubt, okay?"
Scrubs
"that these two would be together forever."
Scrubs
"Yeah, we are."
Scrubs
"- A little you. - Yeah and with a lot of you."
Scrubs
"You can't keep me from getting drunk."
Scrubs
"Pictures of what?"
Scrubs
"You know, the crying babies covered in chocolate,"
Scrubs
"Not because you did the best you could for those patients,"
Scrubs
"Oh, I'd damn sure change this moment."
Scrubs
"- Turk, can I ask you a quick favor? - I am not giving you a hug."
Scrubs
"J.D.: I hate this place."
Scrubs
"All right now, children,"
Scrubs
"but first we're going to play a little game"
Scrubs
"called "Answer the Question Correctly or Stay Here Forever.""
Scrubs
"You'll be staying here forever."
Scrubs
"- No? - Wrong. It damn sure was."
Scrubs
"You're staying here forever."
Scrubs
"And Kenyan Intern, can you answer me this?"
Scrubs
"Is it even possible to give the right answer in this game?"
Scrubs
"Yes."
Scrubs
"Unfortunately, you're still staying here forever."
Scrubs
"of dividing up the stuff left behind when a patient dies."
Scrubs
"I am going to have Keith give me these later in front of people."
Scrubs
"Look, I can use this ratty thing to turn Turk off when I'm not in the mood..."
Scrubs
"Oh, my God. Mrs. Travis, we are so sorry."
Scrubs
"We thought that you were dead."
Scrubs
"(LAUGHING)"
Scrubs
"(LAUGHING)"
Scrubs
"It also makes that "beep-beep" sound of a truck backing up."
Scrubs
"(BEEPING)"
Scrubs
"Okay, I've put on a few,"
Scrubs
"What the hell am I supposed to do?"
Scrubs
"installed in his heart, which sparked a lively medical debate."
Scrubs
"So, if you could have any animal part, what would it be?"
Scrubs
"That's cool."
Scrubs
"Wanna know what animal parts I'd want?"
Scrubs
"I could guess."
Scrubs
"Thanks, pal."
Scrubs
"- You'd be like a big breakfast machine. - Yeah."
Scrubs
"Finally, something happened that broke the monotony."
Scrubs
"This guy from the ER, he tried to kill himself by jumping off a building."
Scrubs
"(BEEPING)"
Scrubs
"the first order of business is simple."
Scrubs
"Do you know what your name is?"
Scrubs
"I don't remember."
Scrubs
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