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Clips from The Simpsons - Barting Over (S14E14)

"...contact Goldman Sachs, the Skewed financial planners."
The Simpsons
"Up next on the halfpipe, boarding legend Tony Hawk."
The Simpsons
"Up next on the halfpipe, boarding legend Tony Hawk."
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"Psst, Mr. Hawk, may I have a word with you?"
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"- An extreme word? - Sure."
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"My son is Bart Simpson and...!"
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"I didn't say extreme to the max."
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"Sorry. I just wanna win my son back so badly."
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"I can relate. I'm a father myself."
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"Oh, one day, they're little shredders."
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"The next day, they're grinding their way to college."
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"Yeah, I make up words too."
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"I was wondering if you could pretend to lose to me..."
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"...in a skateboarding contest so I can be a hero to my boy again."
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"I'll lose millions in endorsements, but okay."
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"This board represents the ultimate in poser technology."
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"- It gives the illusion they have talent. - Groovy."
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"Lock your feet in, the board does all the work."
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"All the work?"
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"Do it without the attitude or don't do it at all."
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"...may be challenged by any unknown member of the audience."
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"I'm challenging you, Hawk..."
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"...in front of all these outcasts and dreamers..."
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"...who can't even get into the Army, if you can believe it."
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"Dad, how drunk are you?"
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"Not very."
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"You're going down, Homer. Then back up. Then down."
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"Back up again. That's how the game is played."
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"I can't count how many times..."
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"It's 300, Mom."
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"I could've sworn it was 302."
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"Now to win back my son in comfort and style."
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"You know, I could save money by buying separate nuts..."
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"...and mixing them at home."
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"Man, I wanted him to look good, but not to show me up."
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"It's time to take out the thrash."
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"Woo-hoo! I rule this pseudo-sport."
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"Come back to me, boy."
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"Dad, you don't understand."
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"Oh, that's the dumbest thing I ever heard, you stupid little kid."
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"Homer, you're heading for parental face-plant."
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"Do a 180 emotional ollie."
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"Look, boy. I know I did wrong and I'm truly sorry."
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"I put you in humiliating commercials for money which I spent on myself."
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"I just wish I had an opportunity to make things right."
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"Mr. Simpson, I like the way you handled yourself on that board."
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"Would you like to do a commercial?"
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"Anything. As long as I can give the money to my son."
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"Excellent. I represent Viagrogaine, the topical rub for bald, impotent men."
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"Well, I am bald and important. Where do I sign?"
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"Well, I am bald and important. Where do I sign?"
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"Oh, Steve, you're everything a girl could want."
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"Well, Cathy, I'll tell you. It's Viagrogaine."
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"It gives you lots of hair and what you need down there."
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"What are you waiting for, loser?"
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"Side effects include loss of scalp and penis."
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"No one will remember this in 50 years."
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"Ha, ha!"
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""Bart Sad." If I ever needed proof of the existence of God, here it is."
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"You spent all the money I earned?"
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"Hmm, "Badger, Haggle and Bill.""
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"Mm-hm."
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"- What's your name? - I'm Bart Simpson and..."
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"It's taught me how to love and care for a child."
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"Here's $5. Buy yourself a suit and get busy."
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"Hi, guys. Dad."
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"Now the portion of our event where champion Tony Hawk..."
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"...your father's done something crazy like this."
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"Yes. Yes. Ha, ha."
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"Please don't go, Bart."
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"But there must be some sort of..."
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"Good point, Dad. What would Jesus do?"
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"Okay. That was just my imagination."
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"After we get paid."
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"Behold the delightful unicorn I got at the face painting pavilion."
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"Shh."
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