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Clips from The Simpsons - Realty Bites (S09E09)

"[Bell Ringing]"
The Simpsons
"D'oh! [Screams]"
The Simpsons
"Not like that fake Saturday that almost got me fired."
The Simpsons
"- It is? - We have to make the most of the time we have."
The Simpsons
"and realize we've wasted our whole lives."
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"Oh! Friends of the Library is holding an historic manuscript viewing."
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"All right. Listen up. Listen up."
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"These prestigious wrought iron security gates are bulletproof..."
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"bombproof and battering ram resistant."
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"Tough break, amigo. [Laughing]"
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"Oh, no!"
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"Boy, it's nice."
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"Oh, I will totally kill whoever buys L'il Bandit."
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"- Sold! - Whoo-hoo!"
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"I don't recall being consulted when you bought that hat."
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"- Stop, Homer! Stop it! Let me out! - You're the boss."
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"this was a natural move for me."
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"Helping people find homes. That must be really rewarding."
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"- What is that, a six-barrel Holley carb? - You betcha."
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"I'd really like to give it a try."
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"So, you're married, and you're looking for your first house, Mr. and Mrs. -"
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"I'm a veterinarian, and I need to keep lots of sick animals in my house."
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"Well, this neighborhood is zoned R-3..."
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"which allows dogs, cats, phone-answering monkeys..."
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"and, oh- [Groans]"
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"When I had to learn about the Magna Can'ta, I made up a song."
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"We should've lived together first."
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"[Both Cheer] Way to go!"
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"Welcome to the big leagues, Marge."
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"- And there's Nick Callahan. - [Marge] A headset telephone?"
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"I thought those only existed in the movies."
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"[Gasps] For me?"
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"and ideals this jacket represents."
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"No, Cookie. I swear it. I'm scared of you."
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"Seat belts. [Scoffs] They kill more people than they save."
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"Excuse me, Mr. Szyslak."
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"Have you ever considered selling your home?"
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"Are you implying I'm in some sort of financial trouble?"
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"- No. - Well, I am. Let me have that card."
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""with gas range, central can opener..."
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"Why, isn't this kitchen horribly cramped? [Laughing]"
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"Yeah, but you shouldn't have to settle."
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"- Thanks for your honesty, Marge. - My pleasure."
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"If you ever need a prescription, no questions asked-"
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"Actually, this is our first time."
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"Hey, Skinner, wanna drag race?"
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"Just-Just go!"
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"Hey, you're ruinir it for the rest of us!"
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"Well, like we say, "The right house for the right person.""
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"The right house is the house that's for sale."
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"But all I did was tell the truth."
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"you're still the world's greatest wife and mother."
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"Well, I can too compete. And I'm going to sell a house. End of story."
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"The first house I have to show you is, um..."
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"Well, there it is."
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"Hmm. Wh-When you put it that way, it does seem a bit small."
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"Well, that about does it for houses in this area."
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"Ooh, that's a dilly. How about it, Marge?"
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"[Gasps] And the price has been slashed repeatedly."
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"I'm gonna give you a deposit this minute."
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"All my life I've wanted purple drapes! [Screams]"
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"The Hail Murray? The Susquehanna Shuffle?"
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"Huh? [Clicks Tongue] Huh? [Clicks Tongue] Huh? [Laughing]"
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"It was salesmanship. That's all."
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"Sure, Marge. "Salesmanship.""
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"- But it was. - Sure, Marge. "Was.""
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"Just because everyone who lived in that house was hacked to bits..."
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"And you get a third wall for your cubicle."
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"You're hangir on by a thread."
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"Man, the air feels good on my neck."
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"Wow, honey. You sold a house and got rid of the Flanders."
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"- What's for dinner? - Well, neighboreenos, I guess this is good-bye."
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"[Groans] Good-bye, Ned."
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"Or you can beep me. In fact, why don't you just stay here tonight?"
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"- Give me my car, fatty. - [Shouts]"
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"The truth!"
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"[Screaming]"
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"- Must've dozed off. - Red room."
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"Red room. Over there."
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"[Sighs]"
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"[Grunting]"
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"- [Engine Revving] - [Shouts]"
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"- This is Wiggum reporting a 318- waking a police officer. - [Siren Wailing]"
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"- Mm-hmm. - [Gasps]"
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"- [Grunting] - [All Screaming]"
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"[Both Screaming]"
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"A smashed hotrod, a wrecked police cruiser, a destroyed house!"
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"I've had it with your renegade ways, Simpson."
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"You're one of a kind, Marge..."
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"- [Murmuring] - Shh!"
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"##[Chorus Singing]"
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"[Tires Screeching]"
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"- It's Wednesday, Homer. - [Screams] Work!"
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"[Groans]"
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"Is this all we're going to do today?"
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"[Choking, Relieved Sigh]"
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"You know, Homer, I'm starting to realize life is short."
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"- We do? - Otherwise, we could wake up one day..."
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"Oh, that. [Laughing]"
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"[Choking, Relieved Sigh]"
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""Friends of the Library"?"
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"Ooh! Ooh!"
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"- I went yesterday. - [Groans]"
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"- Lenny really wanted to go. - I'm tired of being cooped up in this house all the time."
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"- Open a window. - [Groans]"
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"All right. I hear ya, honey."
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"Change into something nice. We're steppir out."
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"The police auction?"
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"Wow, sweetheart. Look at all this seized booty."
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"We could find the drug boat of our dreams!"
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"I don't want a drug boat."
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"Well, I bet there's drug dresses and drug vacuum cleaners too."
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"He forgot to lock 'em. Now, what am I bid?"
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"Ay, ay, ay, my gates. Ay! Johnny C. gave me those."
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"Oh, hey, look, they're sellir your car, man."
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"[Imitating Engine Revving]"
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"You bought a car without consulting me?"
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"- [Tires Screeching] - [Marge Screams]"
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"Oh, yeah, you gotta be careful when you do a trick like this."
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"[Tires Screeching]"
The Simpsons
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