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Clips from Flight of the Conchords - A New Cup (S02E02)

"♪ my sugarlumps are two of a kind ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ honeys try all kinds of tomfoolery ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ to steal a feel of my family jewelry ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ my cannonballs cause a kerfuffle ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ the ladies, they hustle to ruffle my truffle ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ if you party with the party prince ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ you get two complimentary after-dinner mints ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ we see you girls checking out our trunks ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ we see you girls checking out the front of our trunks ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ we see you girls looking at our junk then checking out our rumps ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ then back to our sugarlumps ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ chillin' at my store, doing my thing ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ when in walks a guy with his dick in a sling ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ I'm like, "holy shit, what happened to you?" ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ he said, "how much will you give me for the family jewels?" ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ I said, "10 bucks," he said, "no way" ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ "10 bucks and a frisbee," he said, "okay" ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ and I took his sugarlumps and put 'em up in a display ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ and sold 'em as hacky Sacks later that day ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ all the ladies, they want ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ a taste of my sugarlumps ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ sweet sugarlumps, yeah ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ all they ladies, they want ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ a taste of my sugarlumps ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"what do you think, Bret?"
Flight of the Conchords
"I don't think I want to be a prostitute."
Flight of the Conchords
"- What? - You should be the prostitute."
Flight of the Conchords
"You bought the cup."
Flight of the Conchords
"Sorry to interrupt, but do you see my friend over there"
Flight of the Conchords
"with the red shirt?"
Flight of the Conchords
"He's a bit of a part-time prostitute."
Flight of the Conchords
"I was wondering..."
Flight of the Conchords
"Nut loaf."
Flight of the Conchords
"- She said no. - Did she say why?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Bret, perhaps you should wear shorts and show your legs off"
Flight of the Conchords
"and maybe wear a cowboy hat and cover up your head a bit."
Flight of the Conchords
"I don't have a cowboy hat."
Flight of the Conchords
"I've got that old sun hat, though."
Flight of the Conchords
"And also, I think you're gonna have to go the whole way."
Flight of the Conchords
"You can't just hug them."
Flight of the Conchords
"Just hugs until I get more confident."
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay."
Flight of the Conchords
"Excuse me."
Flight of the Conchords
"Would you like to party with my friend?"
Flight of the Conchords
"I'm sorry?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Would you like to dance? Mamba?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- What? - You see my friend over there?"
Flight of the Conchords
"20-40-60."
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay, 10-30-50."
Flight of the Conchords
"He'll go all the way and he's clean."
Flight of the Conchords
"- You interested? - What?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Not interested? Okay, move along."
Flight of the Conchords
"Move along. I'm walking here."
Flight of the Conchords
"- What happened? - Not interested."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's dark, Bret."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, I know."
Flight of the Conchords
"What expression's on your face?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Um, guilty expression."
Flight of the Conchords
"but satisfied 'cause I was right about the cup."
Flight of the Conchords
"Bret, how much are you selling those superstraws for?"
Flight of the Conchords
"One dollar."
Flight of the Conchords
"How many straws does it take to make a superstraw?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Five."
Flight of the Conchords
"What's the total cost of those five straws?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Two-fift... oh."
Flight of the Conchords
"I've sold quite a few of them."
Flight of the Conchords
"Oh."
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ humans are dead ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ humans are dead ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ had to be done ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"♪ so we could have fun. ♪"
Flight of the Conchords
"okay, listen to this review, guys."
Flight of the Conchords
""Flight of the no-chords."
Flight of the Conchords
"It was hard to tell if the band was a band"
Flight of the Conchords
"So that's what they're saying about you."
Flight of the Conchords
"That's what you're saying about us. You wrote it."
Flight of the Conchords
"It doesn't matter who wrote it, Jemaine."
Flight of the Conchords
"This is what people are reading."
Flight of the Conchords
"This is the written report on you"
Flight of the Conchords
"- that someone's written. - Yeah. You."
Flight of the Conchords
"Maybe."
Flight of the Conchords
"- It says "by Murray hewitt." - Yeah, I know."
Flight of the Conchords
"You're a band with no instruments."
Flight of the Conchords
"- How does it feel? - Not very good."
Flight of the Conchords
"No, not very good. Can you think of any successful musicians"
Flight of the Conchords
"- with no instruments? - The Mormon tabernacle choir."
Flight of the Conchords
"- I can't. - Boyz ii men."
Flight of the Conchords
"Bobby mcferrin. Pavarotti."
Flight of the Conchords
"Bret's right. There are none."
Flight of the Conchords
"No one else is doing it."
Flight of the Conchords
"until you've got instruments."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Is that what they said? - Yup."
Flight of the Conchords
"So guess what I've done?"
Flight of the Conchords
"I've written up a timeline, if you look over here,"
Flight of the Conchords
"to show us how long it's gonna take"
Flight of the Conchords
"to raise the money"
Flight of the Conchords
"to get your guitars back."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, I sort of made the scale wrong at the start there"
Flight of the Conchords
"and it got out of hand."
Flight of the Conchords
"You should see the first one I made, though."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's definitely an improvement."
Flight of the Conchords
"Basically, you should have your guitars back"
Flight of the Conchords
"in about 14 years."
Flight of the Conchords
"- 14 years? - Yup."
Flight of the Conchords
"And that's if you stop selling those straws, Bret."
Flight of the Conchords
"What about the band investment with Mr. Nigel soladu?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Yes, well, I'm still waiting on that."
Flight of the Conchords
"I've got you some good news here."
Flight of the Conchords
"- I've got you a paid gig. - Well, that's good."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yes, well actually it's just Bret."
Flight of the Conchords
"You'll be dressing up in a costume"
Flight of the Conchords
"for a guy called Eddie."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Eddie? - Yes, you know Eddie?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- My boss? - Yup, he phoned me up. It's all sorted."
Flight of the Conchords
"He said to tell you that your phone wasn't working"
Flight of the Conchords
"So he just left a message."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Well, it was a gig offer, wasn't it? - No."
Flight of the Conchords
"So..."
Flight of the Conchords
"I can't get a cut on that?"
Flight of the Conchords
"All right, I'll note that down."
Flight of the Conchords
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