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Clips from Flight of the Conchords - Murray Takes It to the Next Level (S02E02)

"- It sold out. - Yes, it was another sold out gig,"
Flight of the Conchords
"calling each other friends."
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"Okay."
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"So I think the three of us are ready to move on"
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"Hey, Jemaine! Hey, Bret!"
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"Jemaine, you were a slave"
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"♪ it would be full ♪"
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"♪ what if the world ♪"
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"♪ go to school and do a test ♪"
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"Just some ideas for things we could do as friends."
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""Complain about our days.""
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""express our emotions" and "have a beer.""
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"Murray, we don't even drink beer."
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"Well, I like having a bath, but..."
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"I know, but that's something I like doing."
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"I like to have a sleep."
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"- More tea, Jemaine? - No thank you, Murray."
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"- Can I be chandler? - No, I'm chandler."
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"- He's like a one-man party. - Well, does he need us then?"
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"Oh, definitely. As soon as I saw it I thought, "yeah.""
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"Oh, we should play a joke on him."
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"...three, four."
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"And the fun begins."
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"- You work out, Bret? - Yeah. Yeah, um..."
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"- what is it? - Uh, pages?"
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"- Ah. Hmm. - Oh, that's nice."
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"But, Bret, I just... I feel like..."
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"I guess you don't want to get together. Okay."
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"I'm afraid this is a drop in the y-axis, Bret."
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"- Oh. No, that's okay. - Mmm."
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"All right, I'll see you tonight at tae kwan do."
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"She could be like the kooky female, you know... Phoebe, is it?"
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"You'd have to be, um..."
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"- Ah! Ah! - Sorry, are you okay?"
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"but I knew something was wrong,"
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"Yeah. Well, Bret confirmed it though."
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"You might as well call me a dick."
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"How does that feel, a taste of your own dick medicine?"
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"And then... Iook at this..."
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"But we came to visit you impromptu."
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"Oh, here we go. Come on, let's go, Jim."
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"- Friend. - See you, Murray."
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"♪ friends are the ones on whom you can depend ♪"
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"♪ he's my friend, he's not my friend ♪"
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"♪ friends are the ones who are there in the end ♪"
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"- ♪ he's my friend ♪ - ♪ they're not my friends ♪"
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"♪ I'll scrape you up and reconstruct you ♪"
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"♪ I'll cheer you up if you're depressed ♪"
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"♪ friends. ♪"
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"Item one: "Slow songs.""
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"I thought it would be a good idea if you ended each gig with a slow song."
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"No. We don't really have any slow songs."
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"So that's a clear "no" from you, Bret."
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"Now, Jemaine, what if you were to slow down some of your own bits?"
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"'Cause you do different songs than Bret, don't you?"
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"- Hmm? - well, your songs, they're a lot..."
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"no, they're the same songs, they're just a different part."
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"- I play the bass. - Okay, well, I'm not the musician, all right?"
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"You guys know what you're talking about"
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"Murray, I was thinking we should play some gigs in bigger venues."
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"There's no such thing as a small venue, Bret,"
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"only small bands."
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"The camper-van gig was too small, 'cause no one could get in there."
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"There was just that one old man and his wife."
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"Whoa whoa whoa, this was the camper-van gig"
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"that was sold out if I'm correctly mistaken."
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"How do you think you get to be sold out?"
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"It's the small venues... that's the trick."
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"And no more raft gigs."
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"- but we want to do bigger gigs. - Okay, I get the picture."
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""Friends.""
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"Now we've known each other for quite some time"
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"in the professional realm,"
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"I'd like to push things forward in the friendship realm."
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"- What's the friendship realm? - Well, you've heard of a realm?"
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"- Mmm. - Yeah?"
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"- Yes. - Well, this is like a friendship one."
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"A group of people basically getting together"
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"Iook at this."
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"Right. Okay."
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"- What's this? - It's a friendship graph."
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"Okay, if you have a look along here on the x-axis,"
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"this represents time passing"
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"and on the y-axis here,"
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"this is the different levels of friends, okay?"
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"Starting up here with "friends,""
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""workmates," down to "colleagues,""
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"underneath that, "strangers"...which is pretty much everyone I've noticed..."
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"and then "enemies.""
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"So basically you guys are here..."workmates"..."
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"and what I want is to get you up here..."
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""friends" and above. That's where Jim is."
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"- Who's Jim? - Jim's my best friend."
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"- We've never heard of Jim. - Well, if you guys were my friends,"
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"you'd know who my other friend was... Jim."
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"Murray, would you like to see the new immigration report?"
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"- Greg, do you think of us as friends? - I hope so, Murray."
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"We're not. We're colleagues."
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"- I see. - I'm your boss. Don't forget that."
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"- Would you like the report, Murray? - Uh, yes."
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"Now can you fax that to me?"
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"See, guys? I don't let just anyone be my friend."
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"Greg's a good guy, but he's in colleague status."
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"and get to that next level. What do you say, guys?"
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"Uh, okay."
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"Jemaine, friends possibilities?"
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"- Okay, man. - Yeah, man."
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"What's the time, man? Aw, heck."
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"You guys had better go... you'll be late for your gig."
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"♪ who likes to rock the party? ♪"
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"♪ I like to rock the party ♪"
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"sounds good, guys."
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"Slow it down a bit. These two are dancing."
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"Possible couple here... dancing to this."
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"Well, you've lost the audience."
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"Oh, it's the bottom floor."
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"All right, see you tomorrow, future friends."
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"Oh, there's Mel. Go go go."
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"Hey! Hey, guys!"
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"I have some cookies for you in my fanny pack."
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