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Clips from Garth Marenghi's Darkplace - The Creeping Moss from the Shores of Shuggoth (S01E01)

"- No. I think I'll wash my hair. - OK."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- Plus I've got a headache. - Whatever."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"'Why won't she be mine?"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Drivin' fast down the highway"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Travellin' way too fast"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Man, you don't need this, leave her at the door."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Count yourself lucky. Look at her."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Todd's wonderful in this episode."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"I only went into medicine for the laughs - and the pussy, and that dried up years ago."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"That's no reason to mock this woman's condition."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"I'm gonna stay and talk to her. It's called a bedside manner - heard of it?"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- But coffee's free here. - Shh! She don't know that."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Ten-four."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Hi, Gavin. Quick question re that green gas in the sky last night."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Sorry, I thought you were gonna speak."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"It could? And those fungal spores could infect a person?"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Mmm, something smells good."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"SPLAT"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- Whoops! - Ah, you've spilt."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"As a horror writer, there are certain words"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"you don't use in a sex scene -"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"It's not clever, it's not sexy. It's bad writing."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
""someone put it there, he held it, at this frequency.""
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- "Honeyed lining". - "Mossy cleft"?"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Look at that. Makes you wonder what else is up there."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"You're right, that was funny."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"This time tomorrow the girl he loves will be a complete vegetable."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"I can cope with constant bereavement. He can't. Most people can't."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"No. Gavin just handed me this."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"If it's passed to Sanchez, half of Romford'll have it within the week."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Let's hope Sanch ain't dipped his wick, or it's nationwide."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"I mean, with a patient?"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Yes, but they were dying - it was their last wish."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Plus, I've got a thing for green women."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- Linda. - Dr Sanchez."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"The cosmic spores represented AIDS."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"such terrible experiences with..."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Um... I've lost so many friends to that terrible disease -"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"very quietly and very peacefully,"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"And then... Freddie went."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Back then, no-one would touch this subject."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- Have you ever been in love, Padre? - Only with the holy three."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"It can make you feel like the king of the world, or..."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- A complete tool? - It's powerful stuff."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"My best friend's woman's gonna die, she's turning into broccoli."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Jesus Christi!"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"You could steam her."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"How does one weigh the happiness of these two star-crossed lovers -"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"You're the most sensitive man I know, and I know God."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Come on, come to Padre. Embrace the infinite."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"That's it, that's it."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"If you need me, I'll be here in the vestry - or out in my Jeep."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"I'll have a double scotch and my friend will have the same."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"You can't stand it that this time I got the girl."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"OK, buddy, let's dance."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Nice shot, buddy!"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Boil Linda? Over my dead body, you bastard!"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"EXAGGERATED SOUND EFFECTS"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"That means I could backtrack 10% and still be behind him."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"You have no idea what this feels like, old timer."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Sanch, we know what's up with your meat and two. I saw you in the gents."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- Mild discomfort. - Tell Reed what colour it is!"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- I've asked Reed to assist me. - He's not been in surgery in ten years!"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"But this is the whole nine yards. He's not getting near it."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"I'd offer you my own if I could, but this is the only way."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"The next sequence in the show, alas, is lost."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"It was an idiotic altercation which I regret for personal and professional reasons."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"'Linda worsens. Sanchez is rushed to surgery to stop the infection spreading.'"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"'Dagless and Reed remove the affected penis and leave Sanchez to recuperate,"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"The guy happens to be my best bud in the whole world."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"A dream catcher - it's like a wind chime."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Thank you. Sanch will love this."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"He loves wind and he loves the sound of tinkling. And he loves you."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"She's gone. She's all yours, guys."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"'As Linda breathed her last green breath,"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"'and I went back to my humble doctor's duties.'"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"(Hey, big guy.)"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"It's like a wind chime."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"TINKLING"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Wait!"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Thanks for that lift."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"We are seeing an end to the quality of television"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"that we should be able to take for granted."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"'The horror genre is in decline. Um...'"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Reading is in decline."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
""buddies, weren't you?""
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Need I say more? Need I say more?"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"As a horror writer, I don't ask for much,"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Down a two-way lane"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Driving fast down the highway"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Must have been insane"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Travellin' way too fast"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"So, dear pilgrim, I give you my hymn to the heart, with horror,"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"'You are about to enter the world of my imagination."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Darkplace, Darkplace, Darkplace"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Aah!"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Oh! God..."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Get me Dr Rick Dagless MD - now!"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"I'm a language junkie, that's my hit."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"What's wrong with you, Dag?"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Must have been insane"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"And I knew our lovin'"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Alone, your lady treats you bad, leaves you hangin' on the phone"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- Got to get away, can't take it no more - We should be makin' love"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"ROMANTIC MUSIC"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"WHIRRING"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"INHALES"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Where's the sensuality?"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Where's, "He glided in, liquid smooth"? Where's her "wispy mound"?"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"- Hold me in your arms. - We don't even know each other's names."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"he went."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"It's very infectious. The only way to stop it spreading is to boil her."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Romeo and Juliet, 'gainst the future of Romford?"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"When I pray, and sometimes I do..."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"...I pray to myself."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Sanch, I saw Linda."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"I suggest you remove your hand or I'll knock you down."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"She must be boiled."
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"'Yeah? Come on!'"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
"Knock it off, this is a hospital!"
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
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