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Clips from 30 Rock - Murphy Brown Lied to Us (S06E06)

"what's that, celestia? All right."
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"I'll do it."
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"Do you know the history of this building, Stewart?"
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"used a softer version of their gum"
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"They turned it into a training facility"
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"Ah, good morning, fellow patriots."
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"We've got your back."
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"The one in my office was perfect."
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"Oh, we didn't make the prototype."
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"We bought it at West Elm."
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"I don't know. You?"
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"I mean, you're the one who insisted on hiring"
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"This is what we've been making for the past month?"
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"I wouldn't know. I'm not a math guy, really."
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"This is only a setback."
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"Besides, what did Theodore "Bazooka" Joe do"
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"when his eccentric millionaire father"
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"As gum."
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"Tracy, I need your input."
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"I cannot give it to you. I'm a married man."
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"But more importantly,"
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"I'm having a celebrity breakdown."
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"Partying too hard with Christian Slater?"
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"Furious about Nafta? Y2k panic?"
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"to get Paul to come back and take care of me."
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"Fake breakdown."
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"Interesting."
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"I thought next I'd go nuts on the today show,"
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"really blow it out. Jenna!"
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"Did Hamlet start the play by stabbing people?"
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"No."
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"'cause Angie wanted to take advantage"
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"You have to build to the big breakdown,"
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"like in a C&C music factory song."
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"My heyday was also the '90s."
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"So what have you done so far?"
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"And I think this blind item in the Post"
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"is about me."
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"get serious!"
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"Mm. Can we have sex after?"
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"'Cause those guys always put fuel in my tank."
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"Who is [email protected]?"
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"Deets 2 follow. Kev.""
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"Who is kev?"
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"Oh, my God. He gave him my email?"
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"Who gave who your email?"
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"or jealous about this."
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"'Cause I got it going on?"
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"Jack is trying to set me up"
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""Sent from one of my four iPads"?"
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"This guy sounds amazing."
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"Obviously, I'm not going."
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""Broseph. Sor-sor on the haps...""
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"no, you know what? You should go."
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"What, are you kidding?"
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"No, if you don't go,"
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"you're not gonna be able to tell Jack"
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"how wrong he is."
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"If you do go just have coffee with this guy,"
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"maybe Jack will shut up,"
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"And maybe Kevin will insist on paying,"
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"and I can get a jazz cd and a ham sandwich."
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"Girders."
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"That's not what America's all about."
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"Tell me, can you even look at the television?"
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"I can see the floor."
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"I can see the veins behind my eyes."
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"Oh! I can see pain!"
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"My whole body is asleep. Oh!"
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"The design forces the sitter"
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"into what Israeli military interrogators call"
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"It cuts off circulation to the legs"
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"while simultaneously spreading out the ribcage,"
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"while the body begs for oxygenated blood."
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"putty, and, as you see here, lagoon."
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"Hank Hooper will never give me another shot."
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"I'll spend the rest of my career behind this desk"
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"Okay, Jack."
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"And you certainly are dressed to impress."
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"You look like a substitute teacher"
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"Well, I'm just doing this as a formality, Jack."
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"Lemon, I know you don't trust me,"
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"but keep an open mind."
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"three Mythbusters last night,"
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"Let's take a look."
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"Dhanalakshmi, I'm happy for you,"
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"Gurubarath Kurrupuswami spelled"
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"one of the toughest words of all time!"
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"That's yesterday afternoon."
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"Then a kleptomania relapse ending in orgasm and arrest."
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"Wow, Jenna Maroney has gone crazy."
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"Matthew, I'd really prefer to just talk"
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"about my upcoming project."
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"Me running through that window."
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"Right this way, folks."
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"Greetings, gentlemen"
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"I give you a new couch for a new era,"
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"designed and manufactured in..."
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"America."
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"It's a simple couch."
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"Oh, good God, my leg!"
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"Pain is in the mind."
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"It's like I'm full of lightning."
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"Jack, it's Ethan Allen."
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"Are you all right?"
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"You want secrets? I'll give you secrets."
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"This couch... Is a failure."
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"One time in college, I smoked a clove cigarette."
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"I keep buying candles as gifts and keeping them for myself."
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"My natural hair color is bright red."
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"Agh."
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"Good luck finding someone stupid enough"
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"Everybody locate your buddy,"
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"and let's make our way to the subway."
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"I'm sorry, sir."
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"Okay."
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"And will you accept dancing as money?"
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"Kenneth."
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"Drag me to my office."
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"Agh!"
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