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Clips from South Park - Christian Rock Hard (S07E07)

"Summertime love It's gonna get me down"
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"were having their intestines pulled out through their mouths."
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"if we're ever going to make a platinum album."
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"I mean, I'm a fusion guy, but Kenny's background is more Latin-jazz."
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"to listen to for inspiration."
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"It's the easiest, crappiest music in the world, right?"
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"If we just play songs about how much we love Jesus,"
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"Gotta make a Platinum album before Kyle."
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"Token! Get the bass guitar out of your basement"
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"Yes, the tears of Kyle Broflovski when he loses his $10 to me."
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"Gentlemen, we are about to embark on the most amazing, life-affirming,"
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"Wow!"
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"We are going to start a Christian rock band."
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"Walk out that door, Token, and you'll regret it the rest of your life!"
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"at $12.95 that would be..."
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"$2,331,000,000."
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"Still want to leave, Token?"
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"$300? What in the world for?"
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"All right, cool."
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"Let's download some Metallica and some Stevie Wonder."
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"Kenny's right, we should download some Judas Priest, too."
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"- What the hell is that? - I don't know, let me check..."
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"Move, move, move, move!"
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"- Kyle, what did you do? - I don't know!"
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"All right, Butters, give me a beat."
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"Token, how many times do we have to go through this?"
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"All right. Nice, fellas, nice."
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"- Sir? - Shut up!"
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"You got anything to say for yourselves?"
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"We didn't think it was that big a deal."
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"Britney used to have a Gulfstream IV,"
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"The Gulfstream llI doesn't even have a remote control"
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"We didn't realise what we were doing."
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"Now look in this window."
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"Here you see the loving family of Master P."
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"We're sorry. We'll never download music for free again."
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"Man must learn to think of these horrible outcomes"
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"Almost there, guys."
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"Why the hell did you tell us to dress nice to take us out here?"
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"The key to a hot selling Christian rock album"
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"Wow, neato! An album cover!"
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"Why the hell would I be looking way over there?"
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"I promise I'll be good to you"
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"Just for downloading some songs off the Internet?"
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"- It's not that big a deal. - Not a big deal, huh? Come with me."
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"Dude, I can't wait to just go back home and get back to band practise."
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"Look, if we make an album, all that's gonna happen is that"
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"Until we get people to stop downloading music for free, I say we refuse to play."
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"Hey, guys, how's it going?"
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"I don't want to be in your crappy band, guys."
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"- It is? - That's right."
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"It was a stupid idea then, and it's a stupid idea now."
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"I know enough to exploit it."
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"Go ahead. People will just download your songs for free"
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"Yes, it's really the best Christian album that's ever been produced, actually."
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"They need hip, cool music but with inspirational lyrics."
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"Are you ready for some live music?"
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"- Yeah, Jesus! - Feel the glory!"
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"And I praise his holy name wherever I go"
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"we have got to get on that stage!"
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"You bet your gosh darn rear end we are."
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"That's cool."
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"Apparently there's been a change. Give it up for Faith +1!"
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"You know, Jesus, I've been thinking a lot about you lately."
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"Well, that's why I wrote this song."
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"Dude, I didn't know being in a band was gonna be this tough."
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"refusal to play and the second day of absolutely no other news to report on."
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"In a recent poll, we asked people if Moop's refusal to play"
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"We're gonna sit here and protest with you until free downloading stops!"
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"Tom, it appears now the musicians' strike is growing."
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"Well, what are you saying, that you don't really love Christ?"
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"I want to get down on my knees and start pleasing Jesus"
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"I want to feel his salvation all over my face"
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"The body of Christ"
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"I can't take this much longer. Maybe we're just not cut out to be in a band."
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"As soon as this strike ends, we're gonna be the biggest band ever!"
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"people might never stop downloading our music for free!"
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"Because that's what real artists do."
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"then we should just play and be stoked that so many people are listening."
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"Besides, maybe our songs would have gotten downloaded for free,"
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"Our platinum album ceremony. I've spared no expense."
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"And now to present the award, here is Michael Collins."
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"- This is the worst day of my life. - This is the best day of my life."
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"the Christian recording industry is pleased to present you with this"
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"Our bet was that you would get a platinum album, not a myrrh album!"
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"Do you mean to tell me I can't get a platinum album"
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"No, but you can go double myrrh!"
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"don't give out platinum albums!"
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"Fuck Jesus!"
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"Who fuck cares, Token? I can never beat Kyle now!"
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"Summertime is right For touching in the night"
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"Girl, won't you feel my summertime? Come on and touch my summertime"
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"Yeah, Dad, we're just rehearsing our band."
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"I thought a group of Vietnamese people"
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"He's right, dude, we have to define our style"
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"Yeah, and I'm more hip-hop and R&B-oriented."
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"Inspiration... Wait a minute, that's it. Inspiration, you guys. Don't you see?"
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"- See what? - Our band should play Christian rock."
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"- Christian rock? - Think about it."
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"all the Christians will buy our crap."
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"- That's a retarded idea, Cartman. - It worked for Creed."
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"I don't wanna be in a stupid Christian rock band."
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"You just start that way, Stan, then you cross over. It's genius!"
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"Just get the hell out of here, Cartman."
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"You're not serious, and you're a detriment to the band."
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"Oh, yeah? I will bet you 10 bucks that if I start a Christian rock band"
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"I can get a platinum album before you guys do."
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"- You're on, fat boy! - Okay, fine! Ready?"
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"First one to have a platinum album wins. Go!"
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"What a stupid asshole."
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"Platinum album. Platinum album."
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"Hi, Eric."
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"Butters, get your drum set and meet me at my house."
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"We have to make a platinum album. Hurry, Butters!"
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"No time to waste. Platinum album! Must beat Kyle."
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"and meet me over at my house."
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"What? We don't have a bass guitar."
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"Your family's black, Token."
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"There's bound to be a bass guitar in your basement somewhere."
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"Boy, you sure seem driven, Eric. You must really have some inspiration."
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