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Clips from Married with Children - No Ma'am (S08E08)

"...for live coverage of Christian Slater's butt."
Married with Children
"Live, from Chicago..."
Married with Children
"And Cop and 1/2? Good movie too."
Married with Children
"I Can't Believe It's A Tampon."
Married with Children
"I wish Al would."
Married with Children
"Last week he found out there was no bowling alley in this part of town..."
Married with Children
"...with a ladies-only night. So Jerry did something about it."
Married with Children
"...finally get a bowling night, which is tonight."
Married with Children
"- Some guys lost their bowling night. - Yeah, I wonder who."
Married with Children
"Wedge it out the door, beefalo, it's my night to bowl."
Married with Children
"...I realized, A, Thursday nights is now ladies' night..."
Married with Children
"And what about mothers who wanna nurse?"
Married with Children
"Quiet, Klingon."
Married with Children
"- AI, don't you think women deserve... - No!"
Married with Children
"...so we would have something to watch while waiting our turn."
Married with Children
"And where are you calling from, sir, 1952?"
Married with Children
"I wish. Ike was in the White House, women were in the kitchen..."
Married with Children
"Well, we can't go back to the bowling alley."
Married with Children
"Those women are too strong."
Married with Children
"Thank you."
Married with Children
"We could go to the newsstand and buy a magazine."
Married with Children
"At the nudie bar!"
Married with Children
"And the mirrors are gone."
Married with Children
"Tonight..."
Married with Children
"Boy, they really hit us where it hurts this time."
Married with Children
"Come on."
Married with Children
"Live, from Chicago..."
Married with Children
"That is Daddy, you mud flap."
Married with Children
"Tell them what that is, Jefferson."
Married with Children
"...if our demands go unheeded..."
Married with Children
"...and a pair of boxers which read:"
Married with Children
"Try having it in the kitchen, cooking for a man."
Married with Children
"We hate that."
Married with Children
"Anyway, those are our five demands."
Married with Children
"We had five more written down..."
Married with Children
"- To address these demands, or we'Il..."
Married with Children
"Can't spell that either."
Married with Children
"So let's go to the K's."
Married with Children
"I'll try."
Married with Children
"This is Al Oink Oink Bundy."
Married with Children
"You call yourself a..."
Married with Children
"...you're a chicken! - Yeah!"
Married with Children
"After all, you need us more than we need you."
Married with Children
"Yes!"
Married with Children
"Where were you last week when I got mugged outside of your store?"
Married with Children
"- Yes, I am. - Tie him back up."
Married with Children
"I hate that guy."
Married with Children
"Oh, quick, Bud."
Married with Children
"Change the channel. It's sweeps month..."
Married with Children
"...so Christian Slater's gonna show America his butt."
Married with Children
"Kelly, now, this may come as a surprise to you..."
Married with Children
"...then again, the fact that people can ride..."
Married with Children
"...upright in the backseat of a car came as a surprise to you."
Married with Children
"There are far more important things than Christian Slater's butt."
Married with Children
"Now, for instance, the president's giving an important press conference."
Married with Children
"We interrupt the press conference..."
Married with Children
"Move over, kids. It's time for our favourite talk show."
Married with Children
"But, Mom, we were watching the president's press conference."
Married with Children
"That jogging's been doing him some good."
Married with Children
"...it's jerry Springer, the masculine feminist."
Married with Children
"Good evening, women, I'm jerry Springer..."
Married with Children
"Before we start, I wanna tak e a moment to apologize on behalf of all men..."
Married with Children
"...for the disgusting way Burt has mistreated Loni."
Married with Children
"Good move, Burt."
Married with Children
"I mean, when are men gonna realize..."
Married with Children
"...that women are this world's most precious natural resource?"
Married with Children
"Except, of course, for our sponsor."
Married with Children
"It feels so natural you're gonna wish it was always that time of the month."
Married with Children
"A masculine feminist. What does that mean?"
Married with Children
"It means he likes show tunes."
Married with Children
"Would that they all did."
Married with Children
"Jerry has the hottest talk show around."
Married with Children
"Is he gonna show his butt?"
Married with Children
"Jerry is politically correct."
Married with Children
"He's keeping his butt covered until all women are free."
Married with Children
"At least until all women were warned."
Married with Children
"Well, Jerry's not just a talker. He's a doer."
Married with Children
"We had a bloat-in."
Married with Children
"A hundred of us waited until we were really grumpy..."
Married with Children
"...then stormed the bowling alley and chained ourselves to the ball returns."
Married with Children
"Which, in hindsight, turned out to be an error."
Married with Children
"At least those little blower things were kind of enjoyable."
Married with Children
"But what's important is that Jerry helped women..."
Married with Children
"Hi, honey. I'm home."
Married with Children
"Why am I early on what used to be my bowling night?"
Married with Children
"Good question. Thank you for asking."
Married with Children
"Well, as I entered the bowling alley ready for an exciting night..."
Married with Children
"...of bonding, brewskies and barfing..."
Married with Children
"...what did I see? Women. Bowling. Overhand."
Married with Children
"Naturally, I went up to one of these donut depositories..."
Married with Children
"...and said in my nicest voice:"
Married with Children
"Instead of coming back at me verbally, like I did..."
Married with Children
"...they took their doughy fists and they pounded on me..."
Married with Children
"...until a mutual agreement was reached that I leave."
Married with Children
"Anyway, when I regained consciousness in a burning trash can..."
Married with Children
"...and B, you don't wanna know how a bum puts out a trash-can fire."
Married with Children
"Congratulations to those fine women in Chicago..."
Married with Children
"...for what they achieved at jim's Bowl-A-Rama."
Married with Children
"That's the pantywaist that cost me my bowling night."
Married with Children
"Now we've gotta get the bowling alley to enlarge the women's restroom."
Married with Children
"I propose a lactation lounge."
Married with Children
"I propose a dairy farmer."
Married with Children
"Let's tak e some phone calls."
Married with Children
"Well, believe you me, this outrage shall not go unavenged."
Married with Children
"Just don't embarrass us, honey."
Married with Children
"- Is the caller there? - AI Bundy here."
Married with Children
"Too late."
Married with Children
"Now, listen here, Jerry. Bowling is a man's sport."
Married with Children
"If God had wanted women to bowl, he would've put breasts on backs..."
Married with Children
"...and you were in the closet."
Married with Children
"And you forgot to mention where you were, sir."
Married with Children
"I suspect in a zoo someplace, throwing your faeces at a passing tourist."
Married with Children
"Once again, I wish."
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"Enough of that call. Let's tak e another one."
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"You and your thundering herds..."
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"...may think you won, but let me tell you something."
Married with Children
"Thursday nights have always been men's bowling nights."
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"And mark my words. Next Thursday men will be bowling!"
Married with Children
"All right, nice spare, Jim."
Married with Children
"If you shift your weight to your rear foot..."
Married with Children
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