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Clips from Van Wilder (2002)

"Hey, Van. I just wanted to come by and extend an olive branch."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- ID, please. - It's a terrible picture of me, but--"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Well, I'll be the judge of--"
Van Wilder (2002)
"I think I remember this behind. I mean, you sitting behind me."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Well, I hope we can put it all behind us and be friends."
Van Wilder (2002)
"You have absolutely no idea what Gwen wants."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Okay, kids."
Van Wilder (2002)
"This is our Uncle Jäger."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Trooper."
Van Wilder (2002)
"We got an anonymous tip that there's some underage drinking going on here."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Hutch?"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Hell no, man. I've been at the door all night."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- I love you, man. - No, man."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Those circus midgets cannot hold their booze!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Don't worry, Van. We'll get you out, man."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Delta Iota Kappa rules!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Look, I need you to help me release..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"some pressure."
Van Wilder (2002)
"You know, help me relax."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Just so we're clear, I'm talking about intercourse."
Van Wilder (2002)
"And it's okay. You just had to get it out of your system."
Van Wilder (2002)
"I just hope you used some protection."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Why don't you go release your own pressure?"
Van Wilder (2002)
"And just so we're clear, I'm telling you to go fuck yourself!."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Hi, partner in crime. Is there anything I can do for you today?"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Oh, my God!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"We make such the fab team!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Last night, I was so like Bonnie and you were so like Clyde. And now this."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Would you shut up? I'm trying to pleasure you."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Sorry, Richard. Pleasure away."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- PS, this is an awesome room. - PS, shut the fuck up!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"He got expelled today. Is that in your story?"
Van Wilder (2002)
"- Is Van here? - He don't wanna see you."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- Why don't you just leave him alone? - Home wrecker."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Oh, thank you! Thank you!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Any student may appeal an expulsion before the university judicial board..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"and state his or her case within 48 hours of being discharged."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Do you want my hot tub, or should I just give it to Milty?"
Van Wilder (2002)
"We can get the law club to help."
Van Wilder (2002)
"They owe you after the Sue Me, Screw Me soiree you threw."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- You're not hearing me-- - It's over, Taj!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Fuck you, Van Wilder!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"You heard me. I say-- I say..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"you--you--"
Van Wilder (2002)
"you pussy ass motherfucker!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Tell me how you really feel. Seven years."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Seven years! I've accomplished nothing!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"There's no reason to stay here anymore!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"who in the drop of a rupee do anything for you, and that doesn't mean much?"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Who cares about Sick Boy and the charities you've helped..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"And I guess so is a promise..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"made to a wet-behind-the-ears kid from India whose only dream..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"was to bury his face in a beautiful woman's lotus patch."
Van Wilder (2002)
"I'm leaving."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Then leave. But leave the honorable way."
Van Wilder (2002)
"It is at your doorstep."
Van Wilder (2002)
"We need to talk."
Van Wilder (2002)
"It's ridiculous! It's preposterous!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Let Van stay! Let Van stay!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Let Van stay! Let Van stay!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"You were found in violation of Article 2, Section B of Coolidge's bylaws--"
Van Wilder (2002)
"soliciting of alcohol to extreme minors..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"which is grounds for immediate expulsion."
Van Wilder (2002)
"The floor is yours."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Ladies and gentlemen..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Let Van stay! Let Van stay!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"- Continue, Mr. Wilder. - I'm okay."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Let the record show that..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"However, it was only when I met a special someone..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"hiding."
Van Wilder (2002)
"But I see that now."
Van Wilder (2002)
"And I'm ready to move on."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Well, that's that. Good luck, loser. Who's ready for lunch?"
Van Wilder (2002)
"- Mr. Bagg, you will be quiet. - What's any of this got to do with..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"that he's guilty of an infraction that deserves expulsion?"
Van Wilder (2002)
"I was responsible for that party, so what happened was my fault."
Van Wilder (2002)
"If you'll kindly take a look at my transcripts..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"I am pleading to this committee, reinstate me."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Let me audit my last six classes, take the finals..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"and leave Coolidge with a degree."
Van Wilder (2002)
"God, I've bled..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"This school has given me so much. Let me repay Coolidge..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"by parting ways as a graduate."
Van Wilder (2002)
"What are the courses Mr. Wilder needs in order to graduate?"
Van Wilder (2002)
"Biology, English Lit, Calculus, Economics..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- Sociology and Political Science. - Wow."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- That's quite a load. - Well, Van can handle quite a load."
Van Wilder (2002)
"If we expel him, there could be some sort of a coup d'état."
Van Wilder (2002)
"He broke a rule. He should pay the consequences."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Well, let's take a vote."
Van Wilder (2002)
"There's five of us here. Majority rules."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Miss Haver?"
Van Wilder (2002)
"over and over."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Expulsion."
Van Wilder (2002)
"You know, I've waited a long, long time for this day to come."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Either way..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Van Wilder's tenure here at Coolidge is over."
Van Wilder (2002)
"He's in! He's in!"
Van Wilder (2002)
"- Hey, Jeannie. - Look."
Van Wilder (2002)
"I just wanted to explain about the whole, you know, Richard thing."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Me and Richard's unspoken bond blossomed the other night in one beautiful..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"symbiotic act."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- What sort of act? - Messing up that Van Wilder party."
Van Wilder (2002)
"It was the best ten seconds ever."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Yes, these interviews are somewhat of a formality..."
Van Wilder (2002)
"but I think it's crucial we like-minded people get to know one another."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- I knew you'd come to your senses. - Hello, Richard."
Van Wilder (2002)
"I have a written exam first, and then an interview with five Northwestern alums."
Van Wilder (2002)
"All doctors."
Van Wilder (2002)
"That's why I came-- to help make you your shake."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- That'd be terrific, Gwenny. - I'll see you downstairs."
Van Wilder (2002)
"But hurry. Interview's in a half hour, other side of campus."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Good luck, honey. You deserve it."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Nothin' but net, my man."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Richard! I was just talking about you."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Hey, surprise. I'm on your oral exam board."
Van Wilder (2002)
"- I gotta go-- - No, come on. It's a great time."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Finished his written exam in only 20 minutes. This kid is a dynamo."
Van Wilder (2002)
"Dr. Fine."
Van Wilder (2002)
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Bagg. I've heard a lot about you."
Van Wilder (2002)
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