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Clips from American Dad! - One Little Word (S04E04)

"and I have no mate."
American Dad!
"[Bullock] Actually, just having someone to talk to gives me enormous comfort."
American Dad!
"[Stan] I'm happy to do it, sir."
American Dad!
"Hmm? Hmm?"
American Dad!
"[Groans]"
American Dad!
"[Imitates Crash Noise]"
American Dad!
"Vroom, vroom."
American Dad!
"Oh, I've been up with that baby five nights in a row."
American Dad!
"If I have to sit through one more Carson Daly-"
American Dad!
"Oh, I get it. You're friends with Dave Navarro."
American Dad!
"- [A.J. Cries] - What now? Klaus!"
American Dad!
"He bumped into the coffee table. I looked away for two seconds."
American Dad!
"[Groans]"
American Dad!
"You did that on purpose."
American Dad!
"- [Shouts] - Roger! What the hell?"
American Dad!
"Isn't it obvious? Sibling rivalry."
American Dad!
"Roger's jealous of the new baby in the house, so he's acting out."
American Dad!
"Yeah, what makes you such an expert?"
American Dad!
"- Jo mama. - Well played."
American Dad!
"There's my little pisha. Did you sleep well?"
American Dad!
"He didn't sleep at all. He's not a football, Avery."
American Dad!
"You can't keep passing him off to me every night and picking him up in the morning."
American Dad!
"- It's not good for him! - [Sighs] You're right."
American Dad!
"It would be easier for all of us if I left him here during the day too."
American Dad!
"- Back-skate! - ## [Headphones: Disco]"
American Dad!
"Stan, how can you let him do this to me?"
American Dad!
"I'm not his permanent babysitter."
American Dad!
"You need to say no to your boss."
American Dad!
"I can't! Number ones don't say no."
American Dad!
"Besides, it's just until I can find a woman for Avery."
American Dad!
"That could take forever! The guy's a weirdo."
American Dad!
"- No woman's gonna be interested in him. - That's not true. He had a wife."
American Dad!
"[Gasps] That's it. His wife!"
American Dad!
"Sometimes the best solution is the easiest."
American Dad!
"You'll live, but you will not live well."
American Dad!
"Yes. And A.J.'s going home with his new mommy."
American Dad!
"Now I can practice exclamations for when Stan and I get to the lake."
American Dad!
"- [Horn Honks] - That's her. How do I look?"
American Dad!
"Eh."
American Dad!
"She's in the back, but, well, there's kind of a thing."
American Dad!
"I don't care! She's my dry little raisin scone."
American Dad!
"Nothing can change my feelings for her."
American Dad!
"- Miriam! - [Screaming]"
American Dad!
"Die, American infidel! [Groans]"
American Dad!
"[Gasps] What the hell happened to her?"
American Dad!
"she kind of went Shia."
American Dad!
"They turned her into a terrorist, sir."
American Dad!
"That rabid jackal is not my wife."
American Dad!
"[Sniffs] Did you just poop? Oh. No. That's her."
American Dad!
"- [Rings] - Smith here."
American Dad!
"and an alien who's acting like a jealous four-year-old!"
American Dad!
"She keeps using ketchup packets as foot grenades."
American Dad!
"- It's probably just jet lag. - A.J. And Miriam are Bullock's family."
American Dad!
"You have to say no to Bullock. Now!"
American Dad!
"Uh, sir, your family's been staying with us for what seems like forever, and-"
American Dad!
"How would you like to join me..."
American Dad!
"- for lunch in the executive dining room? - [Whimpers]"
American Dad!
"Oh, hello, Jackson."
American Dad!
"- You look terrible. - [Renguins Squawking]"
American Dad!
"[Gasps, Sobbing]"
American Dad!
"Jackson! Forget him. He's a jerk."
American Dad!
"I did everything right!"
American Dad!
"Francine, I had the most kick-ass lunch. It kicked ass!"
American Dad!
"Huh? What's going on? Did you talk to Bullock?"
American Dad!
"Oh. Well-"
American Dad!
"You didn't, did you?"
American Dad!
"Damn it, Stan! I'm sick of taking care of this-A. J?"
American Dad!
"" I've taken your baby hostage."
American Dad!
"U.S. Out of Middle East.""
American Dad!
"Oh, my God. Where did she take him?"
American Dad!
"Is that Roger's French poster of The Wizard of Oz?"
American Dad!
"- Miriam. - Stay back, or I'll spray!"
American Dad!
"- That baby is innocent! - He's just another spoiled future infidel."
American Dad!
"Maybe. But he's your future infidel."
American Dad!
"- What? - It's the truth. That baby is yours."
American Dad!
"Avery adopted him. That makes you his mother."
American Dad!
"I'm- I'm a mommy?"
American Dad!
"I will name him Muhammad."
American Dad!
"What? It's a pretty name."
American Dad!
"You are. Yes, you are."
American Dad!
"Isn't it great that you're not crazy anymore?"
American Dad!
"Yeah. Nothing like the love of an orphaned Indian child..."
American Dad!
"to make you embrace the ideals of the West again."
American Dad!
"- [Doorbell Rings] - That's Avery!"
American Dad!
"It's really me."
American Dad!
"[Sighs] I can't believe it."
American Dad!
"We're finally gonna be rid of Bullock's family."
American Dad!
"See? Everything's gonna be okay."
American Dad!
"Oh."
American Dad!
"Let's go home, my nutty crumpet."
American Dad!
"I believe you arrived with a small piece of rope around your wrists?"
American Dad!
"Number one, we have a problem."
American Dad!
"Stan, this is Coco."
American Dad!
"- Got any cigarettes? - Uh, no."
American Dad!
"- Then go suck it. - Isn't she great?"
American Dad!
"In fact, she's already moved into my house."
American Dad!
"Her? Really?"
American Dad!
"I know. She's Asian, she's loose, and she's fat. I hit the trifecta!"
American Dad!
"Quite right. That's why I need you to do something for me, number one."
American Dad!
"His mistress is moving into our house?"
American Dad!
"Just until he gets her set up in an apartment."
American Dad!
"[Groans] I'm gonna go soak it in your tub."
American Dad!
"And just like that, I'm gay."
American Dad!
"Stan, what about our weekend getaway?"
American Dad!
"I'm sorry, but Bullock doesn't want her to be alone on Valentine's Day."
American Dad!
"I mean, what was I supposed to say?"
American Dad!
"You were supposed to say no!"
American Dad!
"Maybe someday I'll know how that feels."
American Dad!
"[Sobbing]"
American Dad!
"Francine, go upstairs and pack your sex helmet."
American Dad!
"First thing tomorrow, I'm saying no to Avery."
American Dad!
"You mean it? Oh, Stan, thank you!"
American Dad!
"If I had to guess, I'd say bottom."
American Dad!
"A reluctant bottom."
American Dad!
"Hey! Knock it off. A.J.'s gone."
American Dad!
"What? A. J? Where's A. J?"
American Dad!
"Mr. And Mrs. Bullock took him home."
American Dad!
"But- But... I was gonna teach him stuff."
American Dad!
"- I thought you'd be happy. - It's not fair."
American Dad!
"I know how hard it was for you to say no to Bullock."
American Dad!
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