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Clips from The Office - Vandalism (S09E09)

"Normally I find Pam to be a comforting"
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"if unarousing presence around the office."
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"Like a well-watered fern."
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"and I'm like, wow, Pam has kind of a good butt."
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"- A little eye-for-an-eye action. - Yes, yes."
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"Go all Hammurabi on this clown."
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"We need an infiltrator."
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"I know just the man for the job."
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"Clark?"
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"He even looks like a mole."
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"One of his tee shots can wipe out a whole owl population."
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"[Laughter]"
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"You two seem very close."
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"- Yeah. - And I suppose that may ruffle"
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"a few feathers, because for a long time"
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"Well, that is not who I am."
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"I am a friend of the Latino community."
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"And, if you ask me,"
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"it's time that we bid bigotry"
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"hasta luego."
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"make me more electable?"
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"What I care about is Oscar."
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"Maybe I should be insulted that he only invited me here"
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"to be his token Mexican friend,"
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"but he could have invited"
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"any number of Hispanics that he knows--"
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"his gardener Rohelio,"
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"or he could have invited..."
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"Rohelio."
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"But he chose me."
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"The son of a bitch is Malaysian."
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"Hey, I usually watch TV during my lunch break."
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"- It's cool? - Yeah, cool."
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"It's mine. Don't worry."
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"I didn't say anything."
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"I don't think you had to."
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"Excuse me?"
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"I think you might be going a little crazy"
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"with this labeling thing, man."
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"I mean, you put your name on a five-pound bag of flour."
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"What you need flour for, Jim?"
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"That's not the point."
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"- What you making, bread? - No, I'm not making bread."
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"What kind of bread you making? Pumpernickel?"
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"It doesn't matter. Darryl, I think you know"
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"the point I'm trying to make."
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"All right, I'm being a jerk."
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"You got me this job. I should be grateful."
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"That's all."
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"Are we all good?"
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"[Beeping]"
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"[Electronic ding]"
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"What happened to my Tavis Smileys?"
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"I never want to see you working"
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"in the upstairs office again!"
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"Do you hear me?"
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"But my only crime was loving the local sports teams"
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"and trying to be one of the guys."
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"Silence."
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"You'll now be working in the warehouse"
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"with the untouchables."
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"Now go make your hands rough with work."
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"Pam, you know this is ridiculous, right?"
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"- Like, you're smarter than him. - Shh, shh, shh."
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"- This is never gonna work. - Shh, shh."
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"Remember your lines."
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"Hey, you know that guy Frank"
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"who works in the warehouse?"
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"He's not my hire, but I know who he is."
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"Okay, what is he like?"
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"or a lunchbox?"
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"You getting him a gift or something?"
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"Yeah, something like that."
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"I know he loves his pickup truck."
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"Oh, great, his truck."
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"Great. Get the plate number."
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"Okay, do you know the plate-- never mind."
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"So we know which truck to fill."
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"your husband's like a sloppy, homeless hobo."
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"I gotta go. Bye."
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"Come on."
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"_"
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"Hold on a second."
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"Sundeep, let's get you closer"
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"to the Senator."
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"Just about there. Great."
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"And, Oscar, I'm gonna need you"
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"to step a little closer to the Senator as well."
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"- Somewhere there. - He's blocking me."
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"It's only a photo, honey."
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"Excuse me. What's your name?"
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"- Shawn. - Lashawn, great."
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"You want to be in a photo? Right this way."
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"- Not you. No. - He put me here."
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"He put you right in front of me?"
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"He placed me there. He did. He placed me here."
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"- right in front-- - Ow!"
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"- Here. - Oscar... Angela. - Robert."
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"Smile."
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"I'm done. What are you..."
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"I'm drawing your mural on Frank's truck's butt."
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"Eye for an eye, mamacita."
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"Aw, Dwight, that's really sweet."
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"- Let's see yours. - Oh, no."
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"I'm embarrassed. It's stupid."
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"This is amazing!"
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"- Yeah. - And he has saggy boobs."
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"I saw that. It's great."
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"I feel better."
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"Good."
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"This has been a wonderful day."
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"I have to say,"
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"I like hanging out with a vengeful bitch."
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"I know."
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"Ugh, don't sympathize."
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"You're ruining the mood. Back to work."
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"Draw his penis."
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"I got back at Frank in the most fitting way possible."
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"With my art."
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"You know, the paints are water-based."
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