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Clips from South Park - Turd Burglars (S23E23)

"Hello, ma'am. We are the darling children"
South Park
"who's dying friend is all set to meet Tom Brady."
South Park
"I am Mabel Gonzales, the housekeeper."
South Park
"like I'm supposed to say something."
South Park
"Come on in."
South Park
"We've got more sick incoming. Try and make some more room."
South Park
"We have a major epidemic, here, detective."
South Park
"C-diff has spread to half the town."
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"We don't have enough staff or enough supplies to keep up with it."
South Park
"How did this happen?!"
South Park
"Apparently, the outbreak started at a restaurant,"
South Park
"The women contracted C-diff"
South Park
"So, they got sick from another woman's feces?"
South Park
"It's a thing most people only use once a year,"
South Park
"The rest of the year, it just sits in a drawer,"
South Park
"collecting bacteria."
South Park
"Oh, those ladies!"
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"It gets worse."
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"We're completely out of healthy donor feces."
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"to give everyone transplants."
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"So what happens next?"
South Park
"Jesus. What have those rascally ladies done?"
South Park
"So... You're all here to meet Tom Brady, too?"
South Park
"Yeah. I'm a sports writer."
South Park
"A little interview, and hopefully more."
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"Yes, and we are here with our little girl"
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"I'm dying, Mommy?"
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"Shut up, Theresa!"
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"Everyone, the honorable Thomas Brady."
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"Hey, everybody."
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"The rest of you, stand back!"
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"They only want to get to the Spice Melange!"
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"Oh, God, not again. Alright, everybody out."
South Park
"Mr. Brady, can we just see your basement really fast?"
South Park
"Nope. Nope. That's all."
South Park
"If you people want a healthy microbiome,"
South Park
"then proper diet and healthy choices, alright?"
South Park
"That's it. You are all being ridiculous."
South Park
"Kyle? Dude, what are you doing here?"
South Park
"You don't get to be part of Turd Burglars now, Kyle."
South Park
"[ All gasping, "oh"ing ]"
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"Okay, look, I got sick of people"
South Park
"my pipes to get them."
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"This is enough for all the universe."
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"if people were always trying to steal your shit."
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"Girls this was all my fault."
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"I think I got a little carried away"
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"Doctor: You ladies are pretty lucky."
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"If it hadn't been for these little turd burglars, here,"
South Park
"for the deaths of countless others."
South Park
"Kyle, how did you do it?"
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"I mean, how did you even know what was going on?"
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"I didn't know. My microbiome did."
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"All along, they were trying to tell me something."
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"I've really learned that I'm not just me."
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"I'm also all the creatures inside of me."
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"From now on, I'm gonna trust my gut a little more."
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""One for the Ladies" is one too many for the ladies."
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"♪♪"
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"♪ Goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪"
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"We are here, and we're proud."
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"that the women of South Park should be treated"
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"just like your mom."
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"We'll get a donor's feces, mix it with water,"
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"We're gonna do the very best we can."
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"My goodness, look at you! I thought you were sick!"
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"It's teaming with life --"
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"your microbiome."
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"Aaaaaaah!"
South Park
"[ Chuckles ][ Cellphone vibrates ]"
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"It's getting great reviews -- thought you might want it."
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"I don't need much."
South Park
"I'm not gonna go steal my mom's shit."
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"You ready with the bucket, Kenny?"
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"for the flush."
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"we still don't know a lot about the microbiome."
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"The Spice Melange."
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"What?She called you the C-word."
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"These rumors are that you three"
South Park
"in return for "Jedi Fallen" Order.""
South Park
"And, again, I think the offense has"
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"They are me."
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"What the fuck?"
South Park
"No. They got sick from using this --"
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"Even if we found a donor at this point it wouldn't be enough"
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"Half of South Park is going to die."
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"I stopped flushing them because people kept breaking"
South Park
"bragging about my fecal transplant."
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"♪ Goin' down to South Park, gonna have myself a time ♪"
South Park
"in your eyelashes and in your teeth!"
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"He knows about the spice."
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"They're not a part of me."
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"Oh, IS it? 'Cause the girls told me"
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"Oh. Oh, God."
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"Stan: People just keep looking at me"
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"They're here for the spice."
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"He has to be a little protective."
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"Tom Brady's Publicist: A chance. Perhaps."
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"♪♪"
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"Music to your ears, I suppose."
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"The Spice Melange."
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"alive..."
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"Yeah, I had a little procedure done."
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"Inside me..."
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"The bookcase."
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"♪♪"
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"called C. diff."
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"Sheila?"
South Park
"Uh, I mean... It's not that I don't want"
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"That cunt! I told you she'd say no."
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"So, Sheila,"
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"to have a little bit of your poop."
South Park
"The offer stands."
South Park
"What is your problem?"
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"Kyle: [ Thinking ] Half the cells in my body..."
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"all over me..."
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"It's unobtainable."
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"Two faced bitch!"
South Park
"Yes, we do understand. We just..."
South Park
"and we don't have to deal with Harriot anymore."
South Park
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