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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013) - Balancing (S08E08)

"Johnny Franzia has been on a murder spree"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine (2013)
"for the past ten years,"
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"Johnny Franzia's catchphrase is "deuces are wild.""
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"- There are three lamps."
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"- You think Franzia gives a damn about lamps?"
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"This is why you don't have an arch nemesis, Terry,"
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"because you focus on all the wrong details."
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"♪"
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"- I'm giving the murder to someone else."
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"- What?"
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"- I assure you, he did not."
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"I had never heard of Johnny Franzia before today."
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"Actually, you're entire first year here"
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"If our pilot program to reimagine"
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"So the fact that he's 10 months old and isn't doing it yet"
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"I mean, get real, sir."
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"- Oh, couple's therapy isn't going well?"
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"- Why would I include travel time?"
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"so I'm putting in more effort."
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"- Well, Kevin says it's because all I care about is work."
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"But if that's true, why did I leave work"
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"- Wow, you're a lot chattier than I remember you being."
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"That's not like him. So what are we missing here?"
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"Two chairs, two paintings. Oh, my God, the lamps."
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"I was just feeling attacked, so I lashed out,"
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"Franzia!"
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"- Hey, so don't freak out,"
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"and only one will get funding."
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"- That's not true."
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"No one is less competitive than me."
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"- Anyway, uh, here's who you're up against."
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"- Alan Peters. Dud."
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"Ugh, and he's pitching"
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"predictive algorithmic policing."
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"It's him. It's really Franzia."
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"'cause it has nothing to do with lamps."
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"- Jake, what are you doing here?"
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"He's finally down."
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"of the victim's name written on a bus stop."
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"where there was a payphone ringing."
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"He picked it up, and there was a voice on the other end"
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"Stupid Franzia is probably in his house right now"
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"Thank God."
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"I'll just scale back"
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"All we need is each other."
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"- There's been a lice outbreak at day care,"
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"- Ugh, damn it."
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"and my parents are out of town, and my brother David can't help"
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"for somebody or something-- I don't know, I hung up on him."
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"and it smothered them to death, it was actually kind of cool."
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"You can hear their tiny screams."
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"- No, that's an old home remedy,"
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"a place where you go, and they comb the lice out for you."
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"Six hours? Who has that kind of time?"
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"♪ Oh"
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"- And it is working. Hmm-hmm."
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"- Ugh."
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"- And then he called her Cheryl,"
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"a clear attempt to delegitimize her."
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"I mean, she calls herself Dr. Cheryl."
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"has regressed."
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"- I'm sorry-- I wish I could stop thinking"
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"- We could get really drunk."
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"but when I showered this morning,"
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"- No, I know, it's just Charles and I have this agreement"
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"and then we can decode it together"
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"- Here, I brought a toy for the little guy."
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"- Oh, thanks. That's very nice of you."
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"Want to see me cuddle him? I love cuddling."
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"- I consider myself a bit of a Mary Poppins."
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"- Oh, how so?"
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"You can take a nap anywhere in here."
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"Every surface is like a bed."
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"I think the lives are numbers."
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"- Okay, yeah, I guess."
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"a cool scary modulated voice or something."
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"- Help! Help!"
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"- Boyle will explain, but I'm still on your tail."
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"- Jake!"
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"- Mac's fine. It's me."
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"- Yeah, immediately, for so many reasons."
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"- Is he okay?"
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"as it is a prequel."
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"Here you go."
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"Yeah, we deserve that."
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"- Good news is, the heavy drinking worked."
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"- At 3:30 a.m., I seem to have sent Kevin..."
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"- A digital phallus portrait? What is that?"
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"Oh, no, you sent him a pic."
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"- Ants! Ants in the bed!"
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"- My presentation is today,"
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"Got to say, worked great."
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"Although I guess my hair took it a little better than yours."
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"while I was blow-drying."
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"Let's not waste any more time looking for babysitters."
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"- Yeah, this is not gonna be hard."
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"- Charles, it wasn't boring. I know what you're doing."
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"And there was a partial on the wrench."
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"It belongs to a guy named Eric Marsh"
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"I can't run an interrogation."
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"- How did your prints end up on a wrench"
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"- That wrench went missing two weeks ago."
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"- Johnny Franzia."
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"- Uh-oh. Something stinks."
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"- I actually have the same question."
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"- Relax. It's not a big deal."
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"- It reduces robust data sets to a single point."
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"Get your head out of your ass!"
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"Kevin has virtual office hours at 2:00 p.m."
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"- Shut up. - Shh."
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"♪ In the background"
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"- Wait. Is that Scully feeding Mac?"
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"Franzia must've bugged the precinct,"
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"and he was listening to it when we called him."
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"♪ Was the weird babysitter"
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"- ♪ He gave the bug right to you ♪"
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"We know where Franzia is. We're gonna go arrest him."
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"- I guess we could call that creepy babysitter"
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"- We're not giving our baby to a serial killer!"
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"- Are you sure? - Yes, absolutely."
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