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Clips from American Dad! (2005) - Comedy (S01E01)

"self-actualized feminist in the world."
American Dad! (2005)
"Michael Moore? Oh, you mean Michael Bin Laden!"
American Dad! (2005)
"America is the greatest country in the world!"
American Dad! (2005)
"he can pack up his admittedly pithy baseball caps and take a slow Prius to Canada!"
American Dad! (2005)
"- Hayley, I forbid you to see that movie!"
American Dad! (2005)
"And my lucky condom from 1 0th grade!"
American Dad! (2005)
"- That's opening night of my play! - Play? What play?"
American Dad! (2005)
"I'm sorry. This story is rather personal to me."
American Dad! (2005)
"I aced the play audition!"
American Dad! (2005)
"We got the playbills today at the playhouse ofthe play I'm in!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Haveyou makin' up such wild stories.""
American Dad! (2005)
"- Mmm. Doesn't ring a bell. - Well, too bad. I'm doing the play."
American Dad! (2005)
"I'm visiting Sarah Swanson..."
American Dad! (2005)
"whose husband would still be alive today..."
American Dad! (2005)
"Hey, that's Angelina Jolie! I thought this was a documentary."
American Dad! (2005)
"-Jeff, that's a corn dog! We're vegetarian! - Still?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Come on, Steve. We're leaving."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, no. I'm about to lose my... coverage."
American Dad! (2005)
"Stan! This is my costume for the play!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Right in the kisser!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Ooh! Wife not here to support you? Guess we know who wears the pants in your fam-"
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, oh, I'm sorry, Jay. I'm sorry."
American Dad! (2005)
"so I'll be doing the roast."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, yeah! He's an Asian chubby chaser."
American Dad! (2005)
"Laughter is infectious, like smallpox or gay."
American Dad! (2005)
"She wants to be equal partners? Well, I say, "No way!""
American Dad! (2005)
"# I don't want a partner l want a wife #"
American Dad! (2005)
"I would never let Archie go to a party alone."
American Dad! (2005)
"- # Content to love honor and obey #"
American Dad! (2005)
"#The way masterwas by his Jeannie #"
American Dad! (2005)
"# I want a wife ##"
American Dad! (2005)
"- Arewe gonna die, Mommy? - Yes, Brandy."
American Dad! (2005)
"No. I'm going to promote you."
American Dad! (2005)
"Relocate?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Hey, these people are extremists. That's not ignorance. That's fact."
American Dad! (2005)
"Bullock can't hold a grudge forever."
American Dad! (2005)
"- How come all the women are dressed like ninjas? - They're wearing abayas."
American Dad! (2005)
"The beauty myth doesn't exist here."
American Dad! (2005)
"It doesn't exist in Idaho either. Why couldn't we go there?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Next, you'll want to use their bathrooms."
American Dad! (2005)
"God, you women are driving me crazy."
American Dad! (2005)
"There is no booze. Saudi Arabia is a dry country."
American Dad! (2005)
"Now, I've installed extra locks on the doors and windows."
American Dad! (2005)
"Just because we're stuck in this wasteland doesn't mean it's not Wednesday!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Stan, I'm not staying inside all day."
American Dad! (2005)
"Your assignment is to protect this oil pipeline."
American Dad! (2005)
"Hello, neighbor."
American Dad! (2005)
"Where'd you get all this stuff?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Sure. They have everything. Want to play rebuild Iraq?"
American Dad! (2005)
"My husband cannot remember to put the toilet seat down!"
American Dad! (2005)
"MyStan is just as bad."
American Dad! (2005)
"Land mine! Ten points!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Good Lord! How do you stand the sand and the heat?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Thanks. You know, l once stood in for Leno."
American Dad! (2005)
"Allow me to explain."
American Dad! (2005)
"Public singing is illegal in Saudi Arabia."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Hello, assorted family members. - Wow! Someone's in a better mood."
American Dad! (2005)
"- I couldn't agree more. - Great."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, and women can't drive or ride bicycles."
American Dad! (2005)
"And here's the best rule. The man has final say on everything."
American Dad! (2005)
"Thanks. Just, uh- Just put her anywhere."
American Dad! (2005)
"Or as they say in my country-"
American Dad! (2005)
"- And? - And when you're in your late 30s, you may have a chance..."
American Dad! (2005)
"at convincing a long-time female friend to have awkward pity sex with you once."
American Dad! (2005)
"Uh, no. I'm Mrs. Smith."
American Dad! (2005)
"You know, to help with cooking and cleaning."
American Dad! (2005)
"or give our out-of-style clothing to."
American Dad! (2005)
"They ranked us the number two party school behind Chico State."
American Dad! (2005)
"But we partied so much harder!"
American Dad! (2005)
"I have to go to the bathroom."
American Dad! (2005)
"Not to mention my "Petronar." Get it? Like sonar."
American Dad! (2005)
"Shut up! God, you're annoying."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, no. That's just Rog- Sold!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Whoa! What do I buy first?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Iam a man!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Foryou, as thanks for inviting us intoyour lovely home."
American Dad! (2005)
"Fazziz, was this you? Wow."
American Dad! (2005)
"- Great. - It's fantastic!"
American Dad! (2005)
"As-salaam alaikum."
American Dad! (2005)
"Yes. Well, my sources tell me l may have overreacted to your speech."
American Dad! (2005)
"Like it? Areyou mad? What aboutyour family?"
American Dad! (2005)
"My family?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Help! Where areyou taking me?"
American Dad! (2005)
"You can never come back to the C.I.A.!"
American Dad! (2005)
"I am... Stan of Arabia!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Bye! Have a beautiful time!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Hey! Gimme a chance to emerge!"
American Dad! (2005)
"- Oh, look. You stained the sleeve! - I'm sorry."
American Dad! (2005)
"Men, this is the most difficult mission we've ever faced."
American Dad! (2005)
"We've got to plan a surprise party..."
American Dad! (2005)
"honoring his 25 years at the C.I.A.!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Francine! Roger, haveyou seen Francine?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Not since she came back from the store with this."
American Dad! (2005)
"I'm completely off my ass, and I'm barely down to the label!"
American Dad! (2005)
"-Just gimme a ride! - You know the rule."
American Dad! (2005)
"You're the most environmentally conscious..."
American Dad! (2005)
"Bye, Dad. We're goin' to see the new Michael Moore documentary."
American Dad! (2005)
"Damn! She took my gold card."
American Dad! (2005)
"There's my clever little shopper."
American Dad! (2005)
"Oh, this four-literjug- screamin'!"
American Dad! (2005)
"which means you're in charge of planning Bullock's party."
American Dad! (2005)
"- It's on Saturday night. - You planned a party for Saturday?"
American Dad! (2005)
"I'm in the Langley Players production of Beautyand the Beast."
American Dad! (2005)
"I play the teapot. It's kind of an important role."
American Dad! (2005)
"Without Mrs. Potts, the Beast would have killed himselfyears ago!"
American Dad! (2005)
"Forwho could ever love... a beast?"
American Dad! (2005)
"Francine, this is the first I'm hearing ofany play."
American Dad! (2005)
"No, Stan. It isn't."
American Dad! (2005)
"Play rehearsals are going well."
American Dad! (2005)
""Mama, there's a girl in the castle.""
American Dad! (2005)
"Uh, I'd hit the you, not the wild. It's better."
American Dad! (2005)
"- It's important to me. - And this party is important to me."
American Dad! (2005)
"- I forbid you to do that play! - You forbid me? Ha!"
American Dad! (2005)
"if her H.M.O. had approved a medically vital operation."
American Dad! (2005)
"I knew I had to comfort her."
American Dad! (2005)
"Two more buttons! Two more buttons!"
American Dad! (2005)
"No!"
American Dad! (2005)
"What the-"
American Dad! (2005)
"Shut the trunk. I'm sneaking into the drive-in."
American Dad! (2005)
"Francine, you've gotten so fat!"
American Dad! (2005)
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