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Clips from Hung (2009) - Comedy (S01E01)

"... the headwaters of a river of failure."
Hung (2009)
"They had normal jobs and made a normal living."
Hung (2009)
"And that's what I try to teach my kids too."
Hung (2009)
"I'll give you a hint."
Hung (2009)
"He eats it, he sleeps with it, he talks to it at night."
Hung (2009)
"...we as a team cannot afford to take our dung with us."
Hung (2009)
"Pazderka dropped a 40-pounder on his foot."
Hung (2009)
"One more D in Chemistry, Kuzneski's ass is on the bench."
Hung (2009)
"But it's not like we've been winning any games, fellas."
Hung (2009)
"You okay, coach?"
Hung (2009)
"Let's pretend we're on the winning streak we're gonna start tonight."
Hung (2009)
"Let's go out there and tear up some Badger ass."
Hung (2009)
"- Wolves! - All right."
Hung (2009)
"Come on. Let's go. Let's go, let's go."
Hung (2009)
"Let's go."
Hung (2009)
"Oh, God."
Hung (2009)
"- Should I call the nurse? - No, I'll be all right. Just help me up."
Hung (2009)
"No, you're right. Better safe than sorry."
Hung (2009)
"All right? I'll try to be back by fourth quarter."
Hung (2009)
"And I'm missing a game during a losing season..."
Hung (2009)
"But desperate times call for desperate measures."
Hung (2009)
"You know what a public school teacher makes these days?"
Hung (2009)
"Okay, so maybe we make a little more in Michigan than the national average..."
Hung (2009)
"This is my first day on the job."
Hung (2009)
"Hey, it's been a rough couple of years."
Hung (2009)
"Really rough."
Hung (2009)
"A real punch in the face."
Hung (2009)
"I had to kick the renters out and move into my parents' house where I grew up."
Hung (2009)
"Then came the kidney stone that weirdly ended up in a prostate scare."
Hung (2009)
"... which every week brings me a new humiliation."
Hung (2009)
"And then this prick lawyer moved in next door."
Hung (2009)
"Say, I'm having a little open house on Saturday."
Hung (2009)
"So I was wondering if between now and then..."
Hung (2009)
"...and, I don't know, maybe cleaning out your gutters."
Hung (2009)
"Where the hell is she? Where is she?"
Hung (2009)
"- She didn't say where she was going? - Dad, I'm sure."
Hung (2009)
"Hey, you! Hey, you, come back here."
Hung (2009)
"Any guy named Hammer is not a good idea at midnight. And your curfew is 10."
Hung (2009)
"What did I give you a cell phone for, huh?"
Hung (2009)
"All right, I'm sorry."
Hung (2009)
"Weather's not cold yet. We get to be by the lake."
Hung (2009)
"It's gonna be great. We're gonna fish, we're gonna cook breakfast."
Hung (2009)
"Now all I ever seem to do is try not to drown."
Hung (2009)
"When did life become something you buy?"
Hung (2009)
"Drecker."
Hung (2009)
"I needed help."
Hung (2009)
"She's got psoriasis, eczema..."
Hung (2009)
"Lotte Brandt, my ex-mother-in-law."
Hung (2009)
"What's this you are doing here?"
Hung (2009)
"Mom. Mom?"
Hung (2009)
"What are you doing here?"
Hung (2009)
"Just being social. Yeah, you always say, "Stop by, say hi.""
Hung (2009)
"- So how are the kids holding up? - Kids are great. They're inside playing Wii."
Hung (2009)
"- Don't you speak English? Go away. - Mom, please."
Hung (2009)
"She wasn't always like this."
Hung (2009)
"How many fucking lives have you fucking saved?"
Hung (2009)
"- Put the fucking tulips back. - Fuck off, Ray. They're my bulbs."
Hung (2009)
"He's loaded. Is that it?"
Hung (2009)
"And I am only shallow because I choose to be!"
Hung (2009)
"A homecoming, cheerleading, stupid-ass beauty queen."
Hung (2009)
"And clearly, I made the obvious choice."
Hung (2009)
"Clearly, I was stupid enough to have completely bought into it."
Hung (2009)
"- In high school, you were a king. - King?"
Hung (2009)
"You were beautiful and athletic..."
Hung (2009)
"And hung."
Hung (2009)
"What am I now, Jessica? What am I now?"
Hung (2009)
"So, Ray, is there a reason? Is there something that you need?"
Hung (2009)
"I just need to..."
Hung (2009)
"Hey, Ray, you might wanna have that mole removed, you know?"
Hung (2009)
"Look, I'm already screwed with the property taxes, you know?"
Hung (2009)
"Now I gotta find a way to fix the house before the city slaps me with more citations."
Hung (2009)
"I'm not asking for a handout, I'm asking for a loan, you know..."
Hung (2009)
"I mean, if it was just me, l... Shit, I wouldn't bother."
Hung (2009)
"- Well, until I fix the house. - No, for good."
Hung (2009)
"All right, forget I asked. Just forget it."
Hung (2009)
"It's you. The secret is in you."
Hung (2009)
"All right, hold it, hold it, hold it."
Hung (2009)
"Yes. Yes, thank you. Yeah."
Hung (2009)
"- Now let's open our books. - Shit, what's her name again?"
Hung (2009)
"Night musket The smell of fear, thick in the air"
Hung (2009)
"In the revolutionary sky I grope..."
Hung (2009)
"You could get these so-called local poets to come to your class."
Hung (2009)
"Oh, my God, you're so big."
Hung (2009)
"Not to mention veganism and all the yakking..."
Hung (2009)
"... and the coming that had no beginning and no end."
Hung (2009)
"Something that helps you get that very special job done."
Hung (2009)
"Oh, my God, Ray!"
Hung (2009)
"The touch of spirit on the body."
Hung (2009)
"Seawater begs the pearl To break its shell."
Hung (2009)
"And open the love-window. Those are the eyes."
Hung (2009)
"Look, Tanya, I gotta take off."
Hung (2009)
"Is what my thing?"
Hung (2009)
"Yeah. Unless I'm deaf."
Hung (2009)
"No. Ray, why don't you enlighten me?"
Hung (2009)
"You tend to come a lot."
Hung (2009)
"I need to change my sheets."
Hung (2009)
"- What do you want, a parade? - Okay, Tanya, I'll see you in class."
Hung (2009)
"I didn't hear you coming."
Hung (2009)
"- It's the Damester. - Are you drunk?"
Hung (2009)
"So you can camp out for Godhead but not your old man?"
Hung (2009)
"Yeah, yeah. No, I've been meaning to talk with you about that."
Hung (2009)
"And your mother and I give you an allowance, you know."
Hung (2009)
"Damon."
Hung (2009)
"I've lived a long life."
Hung (2009)
""Ed, my wife's stepping out on me. What do I tell her?""
Hung (2009)
"...and I got to thinking, maybe that's my thing."
Hung (2009)
"I could take an ad out in the newspaper that says:"
Hung (2009)
"No-nonsense advice from the guy who's seen it all.""
Hung (2009)
"...like a consultant."
Hung (2009)
"Some people don't put stock in them..."
Hung (2009)
"Lyric bread."
Hung (2009)
"...with a short poem tucked inside."
Hung (2009)
"Or a raisin loaf with Robert Frost's "The Road Not Taken" swirled in."
Hung (2009)
"Food for the body, food for the soul."
Hung (2009)
"Then again, you don't want that plastic taste in your mouth, right?"
Hung (2009)
"Yeah, I've considered it."
Hung (2009)
"Slow down, Ray."
Hung (2009)
"Before we can help you with your dream, we have to know what it is."
Hung (2009)
"You have to pitch it to us."
Hung (2009)
"I'm not in the mood to pitch tonight, Floyd..."
Hung (2009)
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