Loading...
You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from Seinfeld - The Wizard (S09E09)

"When are they gonna learn that news about China is an instant page-turner?"
Seinfeld
"What's that?"
Seinfeld
"Jerry, George."
Seinfeld
"No, of course not. I mean, I'd just like to know."
Seinfeld
"- Well. - Hey."
Seinfeld
"That's the one."
Seinfeld
"What's that?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, bought myself a little retirement gift."
Seinfeld
"A gold watch."
Seinfeld
"Actually South Africa."
Seinfeld
"You gonna buy a hot dog or not?"
Seinfeld
"It's 5:30 in the morning."
Seinfeld
"Leave your father alone. It's his birthday."
Seinfeld
"It's a radar detector."
Seinfeld
"You can do everything with it. You can get e-mail, fax, there's a calculator."
Seinfeld
"Mr. Cornstein died, and it's a beautiful apartment."
Seinfeld
"Not you."
Seinfeld
"That sounds great, Mom."
Seinfeld
"Maybe he's..."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, I may move out there."
Seinfeld
"Yay, Jerry got it open."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, it was so nice of you to come down here on your father's birthday."
Seinfeld
"I resigned."
Seinfeld
"Pinko commie rag."
Seinfeld
"You know what he's got? He's got charisma."
Seinfeld
"Oh, Here's one. Race."
Seinfeld
"No. But it's very nice to know."
Seinfeld
"...you know?"
Seinfeld
"...and a guy in a wheelchair."
Seinfeld
"What are you doing here?"
Seinfeld
"I'm running for condo president. Like your vote."
Seinfeld
"Thanks."
Seinfeld
"- Coffee? - Sure."
Seinfeld
"Isn't that unbelievable?"
Seinfeld
"Yes. It's awful."
Seinfeld
"Do you have your bathing suits?"
Seinfeld
"...to the Hamptons."
Seinfeld
"This is the homestretch. Tomorrow's the election."
Seinfeld
"Right, yeah. The poll's close after dinner. Three o'clock."
Seinfeld
"...the celebration goes all night until the break of 8 p.m."
Seinfeld
"You could put that whole schedule right in your daily planner."
Seinfeld
"- Daily what? - Have you read today's Boca Breeze?"
Seinfeld
"Hey, look at that. Picture of me, huh?"
Seinfeld
"There are 20 people on the board."
Seinfeld
"- What about your deal? - I didn't have a deal."
Seinfeld
"- And I have horses too. - What are their names?"
Seinfeld
"Snoopy and Prickly Pete."
Seinfeld
"A housewarming gift."
Seinfeld
"All right, we're taking it up a notch."
Seinfeld
"- Long day? - Yeah, I just worked a triple shift."
Seinfeld
"It's okay. My boyfriend's black. Here he is. See?"
Seinfeld
"- He's black? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"I'll give you a couple of minutes to decide."
Seinfeld
"So we're just a couple of white people?"
Seinfeld
"- So do you want to go to the Gap? - Sure."
Seinfeld
"Congratulations, Mr. Puppet Master, huh?"
Seinfeld
"What are you talking about?"
Seinfeld
"It does other things!"
Seinfeld
"This is the end of Long Island."
Seinfeld
"Where's your house?"
Seinfeld
"We don't like you, George."
Seinfeld
"And we always blamed you for what happened to Susan."
Seinfeld
"It's a Wizard electronic organizer for my dad."
Seinfeld
"- I'm going to Florida for his birthday. - How much?"
Seinfeld
"Two hundred. I'll tell him 50."
Seinfeld
"He doesn't care for the gift, he gets excited about the deal."
Seinfeld
"Where are you getting a Wizard for $50?"
Seinfeld
"I'll tell him I got it on the street and maybe it's hot. That's his favorite."
Seinfeld
"I got a message from the Rosses at work today."
Seinfeld
"Susan's parents? When's the last time you talked?"
Seinfeld
"At the funeral, give or take."
Seinfeld
"Deep down I always kind of felt that they blamed me for Susan's death."
Seinfeld
"Why? Because you picked out the poison envelopes?"
Seinfeld
"That's silly."
Seinfeld
"Darryl, these are people I know."
Seinfeld
"Nice meeting you. I gotta run, Elaine. I'll see you later."
Seinfeld
"Okay."
Seinfeld
"Still no Puddy?"
Seinfeld
"I think his answering machine's broken, so I just gave up."
Seinfeld
"What do you think?"
Seinfeld
"What, about you dating a black guy? What's the big deal?"
Seinfeld
"- What black guy? - Darryl. He's black, isn't he?"
Seinfeld
"He is?"
Seinfeld
"- No, he isn't. - Isn't he, Elaine?"
Seinfeld
"- You think? - I thought he looked Irish."
Seinfeld
"- What's his last name? - Nelson."
Seinfeld
"- That's not Irish. - I think he's black."
Seinfeld
"Should we talking about this?"
Seinfeld
"- I think it's okay. - No, it isn't."
Seinfeld
"- Why not? - Well, it would be okay..."
Seinfeld
"...if Darryl was here."
Seinfeld
"- If he's black. - Is he black?"
Seinfeld
"Does it matter?"
Seinfeld
"- So you need to know? - No, I don't need to know."
Seinfeld
"I just think it would be nice if I knew."
Seinfeld
"Shall I take that?"
Seinfeld
"- One sec. - Oh, here."
Seinfeld
"Oh, yeah, hang on."
Seinfeld
"- Mrs. Ross, it's George. - Who?"
Seinfeld
"George Costanza. Susan's friend?"
Seinfeld
"Long time no speak."
Seinfeld
"We're all out of lime juice."
Seinfeld
"I told that woman to buy more."
Seinfeld
"George, the Susan Ross Foundation..."
Seinfeld
"...is having an event this weekend."
Seinfeld
"Oh, I just leased a house out in the Hamptons..."
Seinfeld
"...and I have got to get out there this weekend and sign the papers."
Seinfeld
"I'm going back to bed."
Seinfeld
"- Thank you for calling, George. - Oh, sure."
Seinfeld
"I mean, after all, you were almost my..."
Seinfeld
"Okay, I gotta go."
Seinfeld
"House in the Hamptons?"
Seinfeld
"I figured I could afford a fake house in the Hamptons."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, it's time to celebrate."
Seinfeld
"- What are we celebrating? - You remember my coffee table book?"
Seinfeld
"With the little legs."
Seinfeld
"A big Hollywood so-and-so optioned it for a movie."
Seinfeld
"How are they gonna make that book into a movie?"
Seinfeld
"Remember that photo book on toy ray guns?"
Seinfeld
"- Yeah. - Independence Day?"
Seinfeld
Show more clips