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Clips from South Park - Dead Celebrities (S13E13)

"[all screaming]"
South Park
"[dramatic music]"
South Park
"- [sighs]"
South Park
"- you see, ike? there's nothing."
South Park
"there's nothing for you to be afraid of."
South Park
"- hi, billy mays here for the big city slider station."
South Park
"- it's all just in your head, ike."
South Park
"- the fast and easy way"
South Park
"to press and cook delicious sliders."
South Park
"- but dude, it doesn't make any sense."
South Park
"i mean, if you know it's going to make you crap blood,"
South Park
"- because, dude, that's what i'm saying."
South Park
"you have the chipotlaway, so it doesn't matter."
South Park
"do you understand this?"
South Park
"- dude, i don't understand at all."
South Park
"i eat chipotle all the time and it never made me crap blood."
South Park
"it's great you've got a golden rectum of the gods,"
South Park
"- well, boys, little ike is stable."
South Park
"but the celebrity ghosts"
South Park
"appear to have sent him into some kind of coma."
South Park
"- well, of course there really are ghosts."
South Park
"haven't you seen that show ghost hunters?"
South Park
"but i'm a pediatric doctor, so i'm going to hand this off"
South Park
"- the ghosts of these celebrities are at deep unrest."
South Park
"i've never sensed anything like it."
South Park
"i believe these celebrity ghosts are still roaming the world,"
South Park
"reaching out through the child"
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"because they are lost in purgatory."
South Park
"they go to a place called purgatory."
South Park
"it is a temporary plane of existence."
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"it's neither heaven nor hell."
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"purgatory is like being on an airplane"
South Park
"but you're still sitting at the gate."
South Park
"because you're on an active runway."
South Park
"all these dead celebrities are sitting on that plane,"
South Park
"without any information, even from the pilot,"
South Park
"it's like a terrifying limbo."
South Park
"- i am speaking to the celebrities"
South Park
"that are haunting this child."
South Park
"if any spirit can hear my voice, make your presence known."
South Park
"[feedback]"
South Park
"- are you tired of having to put your toilet seat down?"
South Park
"somebody is trying to contact us!"
South Park
"- to which celebrity am i addressing now?"
South Park
"- this is walter cronkite."
South Park
"- all you celebrities need to know that you have passed on."
South Park
"- yeah, of course we know that."
South Park
"- that's right! now just admit you're dead and sit down!"
South Park
"[michael jackson] - no, that's ignorant."
South Park
"- uh-oh."
South Park
"- you are dead!"
South Park
"- boys, quickly, convince michael jackson that he's dead."
South Park
"- what? - he's in denial."
South Park
"he's been in denial all his life."
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"now tell him or you're gonna lose your little brother!"
South Park
"- mr. jackson, you aren't alive."
South Park
"you're in purgatory."
South Park
"- no. you're being ignorant."
South Park
"i'm alive, and i'm a child."
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"and i'm white."
South Park
"- mr. jackson, please, you're causing a lot of problems."
South Park
"- shut up, billy mays!"
South Park
"- you're dead, mr. jackson."
South Park
"- no. that's--that's just ignorant."
South Park
"- accept it!"
South Park
"[electrical buzzing and feedback]"
South Park
"- no!"
South Park
"- he's in too much denial."
South Park
"aah!"
South Park
"oh, ike! i thought i lost you, little brother."
South Park
"- hey, what the hell are you doing inside my little brother?"
South Park
"i knew i was a child. see?"
South Park
"- [muffled]"
South Park
"[michael jackson] - come on, let's climb the tree. * hee-hee"
South Park
"- mr. jackson, you can't do this! this is not your body!"
South Park
"[michael jackson] - no, i'm a little white child. let's play."
South Park
"* hee, hee-hee, hee-hee-hee *"
South Park
"you're keeping a lot of other celebrities in purgatory."
South Park
"- including the late and very talented billy mays."
South Park
"people are just ignorant,"
South Park
"but if i was dead, how could i do this?"
South Park
"* ooh, datta be dat"
South Park
"- what the hell are we going to do?"
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"[michael jackson] - * you know, you know"
South Park
"* hee-hee"
South Park
"how much longer do we have to sit in purgatory?"
South Park
"- come on! - this is ridiculous! come on!"
South Park
"- ladies and gentlemen, we thank you for your patience."
South Park
"i've been informed that we are going to be delayed"
South Park
"at least another 96 hours."
South Park
"[all] aw!"
South Park
"- yo, you can't just keep people stuck like this, man!"
South Park
"- we know that you're all excited to cross over"
South Park
"to the next plane, but for now you have to stay on this one."
South Park
"- sir, you have to stay in your seat"
South Park
"- you've been saying that for three months now!"
South Park
"- all right, let's see. demonic ghosts, animal ghosts."
South Park
"- [muffled]"
South Park
"the first time you saw bloodstains on your underwear,"
South Park
"- was i alarmed? yes, i believe i was."
South Park
"- chipotlaway, kyle, and i'm not the one who uses it."
South Park
"my mom does. she does the laundry."
South Park
"- your mom uses chipotlaway"
South Park
"to clean bloodstains out of your underwear?"
South Park
"- yes."
South Park
"- and then takes you to chipotle and buys you more?"
South Park
"- here--here--here it is. possession by a ghost."
South Park
"a ghost that enters and then refuses to leave a living host"
South Park
"has done so because it failed in the living world"
South Park
"the ghost must be allowed to transform"
South Park
"- what has michael jackson always tried to be?"
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"- a child and a female. and white."
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"[michael jackson] - oh, looky, it's a planet. * hee-hee-hee"
South Park
"- so he wants to finally be accepted by the living"
South Park
"as a little white girl."
South Park
"- well, what the hell are we gonna do?"
South Park
"dress him up in a princess gown and parade him around"
South Park
"like the parents at those awful child pageants?"
South Park
"- * move your body, ooh *"
South Park
"- hello. first up, we have the beautiful miss jessica."
South Park
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