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Clips from South Park - Probably (S04E04)

"Hello, Satan. It's been a long time."
South Park
"- Yeah. - What brings you here?"
South Park
"Do you wish to mount your unholy war against Heaven?"
South Park
"No, I have a problem"
South Park
"and I need your advice."
South Park
"You want to rule more than Hell? You want to destroy the Earth?"
South Park
"No, it's kind of a long story, but..."
South Park
"Well, it all started when this Iraqi dictator, Saddam Hussein,"
South Park
"was killed by a pack of wild boars."
South Park
"I remember when I first met him in Hell, it was a lovely morning in April..."
South Park
"Hallelujah Praise the Lord"
South Park
"And now I am receiving a message directly from God!"
South Park
"God is telling me"
South Park
"that each and every one of you is to walk up to this stage"
South Park
"and give me $1!"
South Park
"So, I want everyone to feel the love of God"
South Park
"by coming up here and putting $1 in the box!"
South Park
"Come on, don't be shy! Come on!"
South Park
"Dude, that seems kind of weird."
South Park
"And now, Chris and Saddam just keep killing each other over and over,"
South Park
"and I don't know which one to pick."
South Park
"- Jesus, what the hell happened to you? - Huh?"
South Park
"and now you're a whiny little bitch."
South Park
"Well, I just don't know which one to pick."
South Park
"No, you've become dependant on relationships,"
South Park
"so you haven't even considered the option of not being with either of them."
South Park
"If you're not sexually attracted to someone, you're not ever going to be."
South Park
"But Saddam isn't right, either. He's the other extreme."
South Park
"You need to spend time alone so that you can find the balance,"
South Park
"the middle ground."
South Park
"That's what I always do, because I'm a Buddhist."
South Park
"God, you're right."
South Park
"You know, I've had steady relationships for the last 1,000 years."
South Park
"And when one ends, I just start another one."
South Park
"But I haven't taken the time to be secure with myself."
South Park
"Bingo."
South Park
"Hey, thanks, God."
South Park
"It was nice to see you again, Satan."
South Park
"- You, too. - Goodbye."
South Park
"Would you like to stay for some cookies and punch?"
South Park
"- Yes, would you? - No, I need to be getting back."
South Park
"Oh, all right, then, but you're gonna miss our big play!"
South Park
"Well, he seemed like a nice fellow."
South Park
"Yes."
South Park
"Let's go make things out of egg cartons."
South Park
"Let's do that."
South Park
"Yes! Yes! It worked, you guys!"
South Park
"It actually worked!"
South Park
"- What worked? - Everybody bought the whole act!"
South Park
"They keep giving and giving until we have it all!"
South Park
"- What? - What?"
South Park
"- You're keeping that money yourself? - Of course, you guys,"
South Park
"and then we can make $10 million."
South Park
"Look, the tooth fairy thing didn't work,"
South Park
"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait."
South Park
"has just been a way for you to make $10 million?"
South Park
"It all came to me days ago, when we were first in Sunday school."
South Park
"But what about going to Hell and all that?"
South Park
"Dude, if God is all understanding, he wouldn't send us to Hell."
South Park
"Then why didn't you tell us?"
South Park
"My brain is of a much larger size than you guys's."
South Park
"I couldn't expect you to understand,"
South Park
"not until you actually saw the cash flow."
South Park
"The only thing of yours that's larger in size is your big fat ass!"
South Park
"Suck my balls."
South Park
"Dude, I am so disillusioned right now."
South Park
"Die, pussy!"
South Park
"Guys! Guys! Guys!"
South Park
"I've made a decision."
South Park
"I don't want to be with either one of you."
South Park
"- What? - What?"
South Park
"Saddam, you're an asshole,"
South Park
"and you'll never be the friend that I want."
South Park
"And Chris, well, you're a pussy and you'll never be the lover I want."
South Park
"So, I'm just gonna be alone for a while and learn to like myself."
South Park
"Satan, can we go for a walk in the park?"
South Park
"No, I'm not going on a walk."
South Park
"- Fine. - Well, you can't leave me, Satan."
South Park
"I won't let you."
South Park
"Today is another day, and that's another dollar the Lord needs from you!"
South Park
"So come on up and give to the Lord!"
South Park
"All right, kids, it's time to go."
South Park
"It's time for this to stop."
South Park
"Sister Anne is a blasphemer!"
South Park
"I know you won't listen to me,"
South Park
"that's why I brought somebody else."
South Park
"Jesus!"
South Park
"Kids, you need to all stop spending all your time here"
South Park
"and go back to school."
South Park
"Jesus, ixnay on the ool-skay."
South Park
"God doesn't want you to spend all your time being afraid of Hell,"
South Park
"God wants you to spend your time helping others"
South Park
"and living a good, happy life."
South Park
"That's how you live for him."
South Park
"Yes, by doing that and putting a dollar in the box!"
South Park
"Let's go ice skating!"
South Park
"We can help Timmy learn how to ice skate, too."
South Park
"Yeah!"
South Park
"No, come back!"
South Park
"You face everlasting damnation!"
South Park
"Wait! No! No!"
South Park
"I can't be cheated out of my $10 million again,"
South Park
"God damn it!"
South Park
"- Serves you right, Cartman! - Yeah!"
South Park
"But, Eric, I think this time I have to teach you a lesson."
South Park
"I'm sending you somewhere to think about your sins!"
South Park
"You're gonna send me to Hell?"
South Park
"No, worse!"
South Park
"Oh, crap!"
South Park
"Hi, Bob! Hi, Rick!"
South Park
"- Hi, Satan. - There you are!"
South Park
"Not again."
South Park
"You know you can't live without me."
South Park
"Saddam, I told you."
South Park
"You can't leave me, Satan."
South Park
"Nobody leaves me!"
South Park
"Yes, I can!"
South Park
"You little prick!"
South Park
"Goodbye forever, Saddam."
South Park
"What are you talking about? You can kill me, but I'll be back tomorrow."
South Park
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