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Clips from 30 Rock - 100: Part 2 (S05E05)

"I just need you to sign this lease I printed up off the Internet."
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"that I point at nerd's crotches in the park."
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"No, wait."
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"Come on, baby, let's go find a pen."
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"Okay."
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"Future Jack, obviously."
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"More like 35 years."
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"which is a lot harder than coming from the past..."
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"In the future, you're happier than you ever imagined."
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"You have grandchildren, and a gorgeous Polyblasian wife."
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"That's a new race that emerges in 2030."
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"They're incredible."
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"Yeah, but what about his/your/our career?"
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"Younger me's, business is only a part of life. Real happiness..."
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"Don't listen to his crap, Jack."
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"If you chose my path, you'll be plenty happy."
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"You won't be married, but you'll have"
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"a house with a lot of glass, and it's cold."
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"And you'll own the Buffalo Bills."
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"about to sign a lease with Denis Duffy."
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"If she does that, you'll lose her."
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"where he operates an unlicensed alligator park."
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"Her hair can't handle that humidity!"
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"No, I don't care. I'm tired of saving her."
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"To quote Liz Lemon, "Opposite!""
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"Jack, this guy is just trying to justify his own bad choices."
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"Go down there and fire Liz."
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"Okay?"
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"We're obviously all thinking it, so I'm just going to say it."
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"Yeah, yeah."
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"No."
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"If you have a problem, I will fight you, Denis."
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"That wouldn't be very fair."
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"I'm only trained to fight four or more men at a time."
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"I can't. I'd hurt my wrist."
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"People could have died. Or had fights."
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"What? Who would do that?"
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"It was you!"
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"What, are you mad at me, Liz? Huh? I did it for love."
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"You're insane!"
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"It's from Amar'e Stoudemire's evening wear collection."
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"All right, the gas is clearing out."
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"You should be okay in time for the show"
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"according to my device here."
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"Forget about Kenneth."
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"Nothing to see here, Mr..."
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"I mean, if, when 'TGS' gets cancelled, we need to talk about your future."
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"I know what my future holds, Hank, motherhood."
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"It surprised me, but I have so much love to give."
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"Well, why couldn't you be a mother, and do a daytime talk show?"
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"Okay. Just please, tell my mother that..."
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"For God's sakes Tracy, give me that gun!"
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"if you shot Kenneth?"
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"I didn't know that Jack. I'm sorry."
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"I'm just trying to get people to stop respecting me."
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"Tracy, you want to destroy the good will you have"
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"Then all you have to do is go back to your easy TV job."
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"Do TV."
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"Doesn't matter how big a movie star you are,"
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"walked away from a blockbuster franchise,"
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"or worked with Meryl Streep, or Anthony Hopkins,"
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"made important movies about things like civil rights,"
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"Tracy, your career hit rock bottom"
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"the first time you decided to do 'TGS'."
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"You want it to hit rock bottom again?"
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"We have 5 minutes!"
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"Ah, ah!"
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"Sorry, folks, while we were working on the gas line,"
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"I'm okay!"
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"Excuse me, the elevators are out. Do you know how..."
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"Shut up!"
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"Well, if it isn't Jack and Kenneth, and Tracy, and Liz."
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"Sorry, recurring hobos."
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"You're welcome for the adventure my absence provided."
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"30 seconds!"
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"Danny can't make the wardrobe change that quick."
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"Guys, I don't know about this."
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"Oh, my God. We don't have a show!"
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"Just start!"
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"You're picked up for a billion more episodes!"
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"Am I back in Vietnam?"
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"Keep your milkshakes purple for over a million years!"
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"Tracy Jordan's doing TV again."
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"Well I don't have the password. Pitt's our webmaster."
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"Well, then, wake him up!"
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"Endangering the lives of hundreds of people"
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"for a show that TV Guide once called "Still on.""
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"Wow, 5 years."
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"It makes you think about all the fun we've had together."
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"that's happened over the last 5 years?"
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"That is true, sir. But, today does make me wonder"
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"where we'll all be 5 years from now?"
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"Fart doctor!"
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"while someone's daughter shakes her crack at you."
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"When I saw you in Hard to Watch..."
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"...you inspired me to contact my biological father."
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"7 minutes later"
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"I know you've been molested."
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"The line was"
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"Someone's getting into the Easter spirit!"
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"Fine."
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"It's not rape if neither party really wants it!"
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"Yeah, this is my front."
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"You can keep it."
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"A man named Elia. That's a giraffe's name."
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"who texted me earlier today."
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"I'm never speaking to Jack Donaghy again,"
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"When I was high on gas."
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"Our parents voted to spend it on a boat"
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"I'll change your mind."
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"old man."
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"This is how everyone talked in the '80s."
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"That only hurt me!"
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"This tuxedo is made out of the puma that I rode"
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"Now, can you say the alphabet for me?"
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"No. I got in my head about having a baby,"
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"And that's crazy!"
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"Or is it?"
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"I don't know."
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"It has a nice, simple logic to it."
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