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Clips from Saved by the Bell - Miss Bayside (S02E02)

"wanna see me drink a milkshake through my nose?"
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"Hey, who drank my root beer?"
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"Sorry, Zack. Potato chips make me thirsty."
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"Screech, I have something very important to tell you."
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"ALF flew back to Melmac?"
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"No."
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"The next Miss Bayside is right here in this room."
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"Kevin!"
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"- I'm so happy for you. - Me?"
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"Not Kevin. You, you doofus."
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"Zack, I thought you knew this already, but I'm a guy."
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"about Miss Bayside having to be a girl."
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"Let me see those."
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"I'll need my glasses."
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"Okay, let's see here..."
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"Bing! He's right, boss, you can enter."
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"But do something about your hair."
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"But I don't want to enter, Zack. No one would vote for me."
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"That's because the other kids don't know the real you."
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"- I have some? - Yeah."
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"You're full of them."
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"You'll go where no man has ever gone before."
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"Okay. But I have to be home before dark."
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"Let Belding know we're united against him."
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"Yeah!"
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"Kelly, show some more enthusiasm."
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"On second thought, just carry the sign, okay?"
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"Hi, Jessie, Kelly."
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"Nice signs."
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"They would've been prettier in pink."
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"- Who? - Screech."
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""Ban Miss Bayside." Huh."
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"- Still there, sir. - Don't worry, sir,"
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"I don't think you're a pig."
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"Sir, can I please have an entry form for the pageant?"
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"Don't be ridiculous."
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"- I'm entering Screech. - Are you crazy?"
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"You can't enter a man."
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"I think it's a great idea to enter a man in the pageant."
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"It makes a statement."
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"Oh, you want a statement? Well, here's a statement:"
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""No way, José!""
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"Now I'll never be beauty queen."
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"- Hold it! - Hold it!"
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"If you don't let Screech in, you're discriminating against men."
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"They'll just join us in the picket line."
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"Yeah. I'll get you 20 good men by lunch, Jessie."
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"I can deliver three geeks and a nerd."
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"Wait a minute now. Let's not let this thing get out of hand here."
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"Jessie, if I let this..."
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"contestant enter the pageant,"
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"will you stop your protesting?"
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"Well..."
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"a man in a beauty contest would be a big step forward."
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"All right. Let Screech enter and I'll call off the protest."
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"Okay. Sign up."
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"Mom will be so proud."
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"No, Lisa. This is the first time the pageant hasn't been a mockery."
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"People should vote for the inner person."
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"You're not in the contest."
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"No, you'd feel ridiculous competing against Screech."
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"No, she wouldn't. I bet Jessie would be proud"
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"to be part of an event that treats men and women equally."
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"- Right, Jessie? - Well, yeah. I suppose so."
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"- Then why don't you enter? - Yeah."
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"Yeah, show off your inner person."
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"All right, I will. I'm in."
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"Right. Way to go, Mama."
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"- Jessie what? - I saw it with my own two eyes."
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"She thinks she's got the prettiest "inner person" in the school."
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"Let's see if her inner person"
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"can match my outer person in a bikini."
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"Ooh. Does that mean you're going to give her some competition?"
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"- You're darn right I am. - Great."
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"Having a beauty contest without you, Kelly,"
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"Hey, guys. What's up?"
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"Nothing much, except that the Miss Bayside has become a real contest"
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"now that Jessie and Kelly are in."
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"What? Kelly, you're in?"
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"Yeah, and don't feel bad about backing Screech instead of me."
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"And until the pageant is over, no more dates."
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"Kelly."
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"Could you hand me my towel, please?"
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"Sure."
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"What does that mean?"
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"It means you're a hypocrite! Talking me out of the pageant,"
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"and then you entering it yourself!"
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"Excuse me, but I'm in because the politics behind it changed."
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"Your understanding of politics"
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"is limited to who won the election on "Sesame Street.""
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"Can you believe this snob?"
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"I can't believe you, Kelly-come-lately!"
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"It's not enough for you to be Homecoming Queen,"
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"you are not gonna win."
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"It is not a beauty contest anymore."
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"That's right, you entered it!"
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"Hey, hey, hey. Wait a minute."
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"What are we getting so upset for?"
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"We are up against Screech."
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"All right, rehearsals for the talent competition."
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"and takes a look at her new body."
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"Now she is a butterfly."
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"Now she has wings,"
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"and now she can fly!"
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"Screech's chances look better than ever."
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"She's got a voice like a bird. Watch."
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"♪ You saw me standing alone ♪"
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"♪ Without a dream in my heart ♪"
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"♪ Without a love of my own ♪"
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"Ooh."
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"Okay, next..."
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"Thank you, Zack."
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"I've got a date with Robocop's kid sister."
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"I'll do the jokes."
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"Hey, boss, I've got to blow my nose and I don't have a handkerchief."
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"- Can I borrow yours? - This is very unprofessional."
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"You'd better hurry it up! I feel a sneezing fit coming on."
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"Ah-ah..."
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"ah-ah-tchoo!"
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"We'll see about that, Preppie."
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