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Clips from American Dad! - An Apocalypse to Remember (S02E02)

"Good. Let's begin."
American Dad!
"One hundred percent."
American Dad!
"Nuclear war? Stan, are you sure?"
American Dad!
"- We have to go now. - What about Roger?"
American Dad!
"- Leave him. There's no time. - Stan, he's right in the window."
American Dad!
"Well, they're off to somewhere in a hurry."
American Dad!
"Any luck finding me a blender?"
American Dad!
"This one's pretty."
American Dad!
"Pretty? Bonnie Hunt's pretty. This one's Bonnie Bedelia gorgeous."
American Dad!
"- Who's Bonnie Bedelia? - Die Hard's wife."
American Dad!
"Oh, it costs money."
American Dad!
"Oh, that's a bridal registry. When couples get married..."
American Dad!
"...they choose the gifts they want to receive from their guests."
American Dad!
"All I have to do is get married by next week..."
American Dad!
"...and I can get my blender in time for Grey's Anatomy."
American Dad!
"JDate, huh?"
American Dad!
"Klaus, these girls don't look that desperate."
American Dad!
"Click on "Over 35 and Never Married.""
American Dad!
"Oh, God, look at that one."
American Dad!
"Oh, God, that's the picture she chose?"
American Dad!
"That's how she advertizes herself?"
American Dad!
"Further, further. I can still see her neck."
American Dad!
"- Gone, all gone. - What are we gonna do?"
American Dad!
"Listen to my every word if you want to live."
American Dad!
"Francine, you dig another fire pit since Hayley's will be piss-poor."
American Dad!
"- What are you gonna do? - I'm gonna gather wood."
American Dad!
"- Anyone wanna make fun of me now? - No, sir."
American Dad!
"Oh, my God, my cell phone. There must be other survivors."
American Dad!
"Hello? Am I speaking to an astronaut?"
American Dad!
"...during the drill. He was shouting."
American Dad!
"Second, interesting footnote, I'm not your secretary."
American Dad!
"What do you mean, "drill"? You telling me the world hasn't ended?"
American Dad!
"...thanks for saving me and the fish. I see where we stand."
American Dad!
"Oh, no."
American Dad!
"Oh, gotta take this. Hello?"
American Dad!
"Well, shalom."
American Dad!
"Yes. Well, as it turns out..."
American Dad!
"This is difficult for me to put into words."
American Dad!
"What, just tell us what we need to do."
American Dad!
"Then your faith is well-placed, because we're the last ones left on Earth."
American Dad!
"- What was that? - Mosquito."
American Dad!
"If my family finds out the world didn't end..."
American Dad!
"But I can't keep them out here forever. There's only one thing to do."
American Dad!
"Concentrate very hard and try to switch souls with this beetle."
American Dad!
"Answer her. That's your wife."
American Dad!
"- Stan? - I'm looking for my contact."
American Dad!
"You don't wear contacts."
American Dad!
"Then peaches. Listen, I'm gonna go..."
American Dad!
"Not for long, because I'm going out to kill us some breakfast."
American Dad!
"Nice recommendation. You. You."
American Dad!
"I just hit a possum!"
American Dad!
"So I had to fire Theresa, hire a painter and get a new hygienist, all in one week."
American Dad!
"- Never mind, we're okay. - Oh, Jacob, I'm so impressed."
American Dad!
"You seem to have it all figured out."
American Dad!
"- You can hardly even notice it's there. - You like it? Dr. Bernbaum."
American Dad!
"- "While I'm here..." - "While I'm here...""
American Dad!
"Boy, I have never told a guy about my nose job on the first date before."
American Dad!
"Oh, Jacob, you have made me so happy."
American Dad!
"Ma, you won't believe it. He asked me to marry him."
American Dad!
"Yes, the orthodontist."
American Dad!
"Brandeis. Reformed. Ashkenazi. Haven't seen the car."
American Dad!
"We did it, Ma!"
American Dad!
"- What is that, a rat? - It's a possum."
American Dad!
"- Hold steady. - Stan, the car is right there."
American Dad!
"It's unlocked."
American Dad!
"I've saved your lives once already, haven't I? Hold your position."
American Dad!
"And that's how you kill a bear."
American Dad!
"That was a close one."
American Dad!
"Didn't you hear?"
American Dad!
"All of civilization was destroyed by a nuclear holocaust."
American Dad!
"That's the reason I moved up here 10 years ago."
American Dad!
"The name's Bu..."
American Dad!
"Dang it. It's been so long, I forget."
American Dad!
"Buckle? Do people go by "Buckle"?"
American Dad!
"How would you folks like to come by old Buckle's for a nice hot meal?"
American Dad!
"- All right. - Let's eat. You're a lifesaver."
American Dad!
"You don't need him. We've got food. I just killed a bear with deadly stillness."
American Dad!
"You'll miss out on all the fun..."
American Dad!
"...when the cubs come looking for their mama and find her dead."
American Dad!
"God, I hope they're not too young."
American Dad!
"There's no room for you in our stories. Hey, wait up."
American Dad!
"This place is amazing. Did you do it all yourself?"
American Dad!
"We used to have paint cans all over, but then I put up a shelf."
American Dad!
"I was an lmagineer at Disney. We'd build this crap in our sleep."
American Dad!
"Literally."
American Dad!
"Its name was Michael Eisner."
American Dad!
"Such a command of the literal and figurative."
American Dad!
"Oh, my God, that looks so good."
American Dad!
"I see what's going on here. He's clearly jealous of my shelf."
American Dad!
"- Come on, everyone, let's go. - Dad, I'm tired and hungry."
American Dad!
"Can't we just stay up here with Buckle?"
American Dad!
"Good idea. Could be mutants down there."
American Dad!
"Mutants? What mutants?"
American Dad!
"They absorbed enough radiation to become..."
American Dad!
"Oh, how do I put this?"
American Dad!
"If they infect you, you could become one of them."
American Dad!
"- Relax, there aren't any mutants. - How do you know, Stan?"
American Dad!
"Because there's only been one mutant. He was half-human, half-divine."
American Dad!
"...until he ascended to heaven..."
American Dad!
"Isn't he adorable."
American Dad!
"Russell Rothberg. Can I get you something from the bar?"
American Dad!
"Oh, I don't drink any more."
American Dad!
"Jacob, I have spent the last 10 years..."
American Dad!
"...preparing the perfect wedding for my Sharri."
American Dad!
"I've already booked the Crystal Room at the Hyatt for next June."
American Dad!
"...it's really important that we get married by Sunday."
American Dad!
"- But Sunday is such short notice... - Daddy, I want this."
American Dad!
"We can have the wedding in my back yard."
American Dad!
"Fantastic. I'll handle all the arrangements."
American Dad!
"Mitzvahs all around."
American Dad!
"Finished. Buckle's got nothing on me."
American Dad!
"This will provide shelter and hold things."
American Dad!
"- We don't have any things. - A shelf we don't even need. Lavish."
American Dad!
"No, no. I can do this."
American Dad!
"But I can't promise anything."
American Dad!
"Hey, I'm gonna just go in the kitchen and steal your food."
American Dad!
"Taking all the fruit from the helpless deaf kids..."
American Dad!
"What?"
American Dad!
"You lied to us, Dad?"
American Dad!
"...but Harry Potter does it and he's your favorite writer."
American Dad!
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