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Clips from NewsRadio - Awards Show (S03E03)

"Well, of course not, it's just that--"
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"is bleaching the pit stains out of my best white T-shirt."
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"Not at all, Joe. It's just that I wanted--"
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"doesn't know the difference"
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"between a bow tie and a "cumberband.""
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"I guess now is probably not a good time"
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"I'm just worried that he's gonna show up"
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"wearing a tuxedo with a pair of red high-tops or something."
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"Or worse, one of those T-shirts with the picture of a tux on it."
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"Oh!"
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"I love those! I always think they're real."
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"Catherine, you guys--"
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"Well, sure, Matthew, sweetie. What is it?"
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"I mean, people in the office are starting to think"
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"I'm a little-- Whoo! --crazy."
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"Maybe we'll take a look at the break room a little later, okay?"
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"You know what? We, uh--"
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"We don't have to go to the break room, actually."
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"I have-- [MUMBLING]"
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"that they are ant bites."
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"They bit me when that spoon,"
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"uh, accidentally fell off the counter"
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"[HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] Yes."
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"[NORMAL VOICE] Oh, Beth, that is so sweet of you to agree to that."
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"Sweetie, please."
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"Um, you know what? I would love to take a look"
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"at the itchy red welts on your buttocks."
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"at the welts on his buttocks."
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"Bill too, the water cooler guy."
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"Yeah, I guess it could get-- Okay, bye-bye!"
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""Quite frankly, in over their heads.""
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"Well, that is not all. No, no, no."
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"He continues to say:"
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"can handle the pressure of being a news director.""
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"Whenever I have a bee in my bonnet,"
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"I find it helps to take my hat off."
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"Meaning I take my hat off, the bee flies away."
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"We got ants?"
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"That's the understatement of the century."
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"[SIGHS]"
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"what's so bad about wanting to win."
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"You know, when I was in school there was this kid, right?"
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"He wanted to play football more than anything."
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"Coach wouldn't let him because he wasn't big enough."
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"I'm assuming for the purposes of this story, no."
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"Damn straight!"
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"I mean, the kid--"
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"The kid ate like a wild animal every day."
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"I mean, he pumped iron all night long and--"
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"Makes you think, huh?"
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"I really don't think I get the point."
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"Oh, yeah. Well, there's one more thing."
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"That kid's name was Richard Nixon."
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"Richard Milhous Nixon?"
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"Uh, let's see. Hernia, wild animal, Nixon."
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"Oh, hell, it's in there somewhere."
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"I'm glad I could help you out."
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"Do you really think you can, Jimmy?"
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"Hey, Mr. James. What's up?"
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"Just wondering if you're looking forward"
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"to the fancy dress, black tie wingding tonight."
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"Uh, not really, but, uh, Catherine asked me to go,"
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"and I don't wanna deny her the pleasure of my company."
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"Ah, yeah, I hear that. I-I-I hear that."
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"Hey. Hey,"
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"did I ever tell you the story about my first job interview?"
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"I don't think so."
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"Okay. Well, as I remember, I was being interviewed"
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"for a low-level position at a records management firm."
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"there's all these guys, right?"
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"They were wearing narrow ties, and I come in with a--"
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"You know, a big, old fat one."
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"and beg the man for a second chance?"
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"Hell, no!"
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"I went out and started my own records management firm."
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"Put that clown out of business in six months."
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"That's right, sir. 'Cause even with a big fat necktie,"
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"you're still the best man for the job."
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"Damn straight. And that pinched-face,"
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"narrow-tied little bastard had to learn that lesson right then!"
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"it's about the man inside the clothes."
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"You are straight, brother man."
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"Thank you, sir. Would you go tell Catherine"
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"I'll wear whatever I wanna wear?"
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"You got it. They don't call me"
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""The Great Communicator" for nothing."
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"I am on it!"
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"So is he gonna wear a tux?"
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"At this point, I don't know if I'm gonna wear one."
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"Well, well, well, If we don't look"
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"like a couple of winners, I don't know who does."
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"My stomach's much flatter"
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"Cher. Uh?"
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"of what she wore to the Oscars in '87."
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"Tell you one thing. The only award Marty Jackson's"
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"Where's Matthew?"
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"DAVE: Come on, Matthew. Let's go!"
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"Okay. Coming!"
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""Do not shake can.""
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"Okay, too late for that."
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"Oh, no. No."
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"Okay."
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"Joe, you look great."
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"You really do. Thank you."
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"Your last name's Garrelli?"
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"You're not wearing that, are you?"
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"Of course. Why not?"
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"'Cause everybody can see everything."
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"How would you like it if I showed up"
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"with a bow tie and a jockstrap?"
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"I was elected treasurer of my fraternity. We--"
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"Never mind."
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"[HACKING COUGH]"
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"Welcome to the 32nd annual American Broadcasters"
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"Society Awards Banquet."
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"Tonight, we recognize the best and the brightest"
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"And who knows?"
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"Maybe even Marty Jackson will win something tonight."
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"That's right, Marty."
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"For the 10th time, Joe, I am not cold."
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