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Clips from NewsRadio - Awards Show (S03E03)

"Pardon?"
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"I'm not looking at anything."
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"a rented tux."
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"Oh, dude, that is it. You are so squashed."
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"Bring it on."
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"[SIGHS] [JOE GROANS]"
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"I just dropped by to say congratulations."
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"Really?"
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"Yeah. Really, Dave."
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"Twenty-nine."
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"No kidding? You know something?"
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"Please-- Please, have a seat."
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"Hi. Hi."
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"of being a news director."
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"But I guess that was just me, huh?"
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"No. No, no, no."
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"I should stop because my liver"
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"You got a long road ahead of you."
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"Salud."
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"Do you ever see that TV show, The Prisoner?"
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"What? Hello."
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"Dude, what's the problem?"
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"Matthew, there's like one, two..."
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"There's like-- There's like six grains"
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"how the ant problem got started in the break room."
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"There's no ant problem in the break room."
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"I prefer the term ant enthusiast."
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"And I haven't seen any ants in the break room."
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"Well, probably because your big, clunky work boots"
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"scare them away or something."
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"Show us the ants. Okay, yeah."
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"it's not safer than a savings account?"
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"No. That's just what those guys"
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"at the 401(k) scheme want you to think."
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"You keep your money in a shoebox under your bed or something?"
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"Right."
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"Like I'm gonna tell you where I keep my shoebox."
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"You thought I was an ant, didn't you?"
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"Seriously though, Beth, I'm just--"
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"I'm doing this to dramatize a point."
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"To what?"
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"Dramatize a point."
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"because I wanna show it to Joe."
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"Oh, yeah. It makes a good point too."
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"There's ants on the loose in here."
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"This is gonna be great!"
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"Beth?"
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"Beth? Sweetie honey?"
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"Uh, tonight is the big night,"
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"and I'm not gonna try to hide it."
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"Oh, let me guess. Mom and Dad are out of town,"
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"and you and Lisa are finally gonna go all the way."
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"the American Broadcasters Society Awards Banquet."
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"Ah. And remember, people,"
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"it's not whether you win or lose,"
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"I beg to differ."
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"I think we stand a pretty good chance"
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"What on earth makes you think that?"
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"Oh, let's all be real quiet"
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"[HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] We're gonna win some ABSAs! We're gonna win--"
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"[NORMAL VOICE] Have you ever considered colon hydrotherapy?"
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"I trust, as usual,"
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"Come on, dude. WNYX loses every year"
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"in every category."
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"Joe's upset because he doesn't get to go."
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"Well, I have an extra ticket, Joe,"
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"if you'd like to be my guest."
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"I don't know if I could bear watching"
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"all you guys get humiliated again."
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"WNYX may have lost in the past, but over this last year"
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"You know, call it a hunch, if you want to,"
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"but you know what?"
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"Ah, screw it. Nobody has to go."
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"Look, I didn't wanna say this in front of everyone--"
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"I understand, Bill."
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"You wanna win just as much as I do."
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"No, it's about your stomach."
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"You really should consider the colon hydrotherapy."
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"Try my guy. Best in the business."
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"Thanks, Bill."
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"[DAVE SIGHS]"
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"Just ignore them."
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"I would like to, but it's just that they're--"
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"I know."
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"Because we are gonna lose."
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"They always do."
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"Oh, come on."
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"Well, I just assumed the rhyming aspect"
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"suggested an internal logic of its own."
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"Party...is...over."
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"Got it."
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"What did Marty ever do to you?"
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"Here is an interview he gave to the papers"
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"Here we go. Uh--"
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""The problem with radio is that too many"
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"--are quite frankly, in over their heads.""
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"I think it's pretty obvious who he's talking about."
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"Well, neither am I. Thank you very much."
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"And I don't think the voting members are stupid."
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"I think they're gonna send a clear message"
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"Broadcasters Society Awards."
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"I'm aware of that."
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"Well, it's driving me crazy. ABSA, ABSA, ABSA."
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"Dave, I was kiddin'. Lisa, I heard what you said."
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"I think those people are dorky too."
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"Thank you, sir. You're welcome."
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"Want me to rile up the troops a bit?"
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"That'd be great."
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"Set 'em up for the big fall when we lose like we always do?"
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"Yes indeed, we will just see."
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"Really got a fire in his belly, doesn't he?"
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"Yes, he does. He really ought to"
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"Hey, Joe."
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"I was, uh, just wondering:"
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"Jets jersey, green and white face paint"
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"But seriously,"
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"gonna be pretty dressed up and..."
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"So?"
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"Well, I was just thinking that, you know--"
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"You think I'll embarrass you?"
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