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Clips from Ted Lasso - Trent Crimm: The Independent (S01E01)

"to the Allen-Bradley Clock Tower up there in Milwaukee."
Ted Lasso
"They ended up leaving me there all by myself."
Ted Lasso
"Yeah, three hours and 42 minutes. You know how I know that?"
Ted Lasso
"You were staring at a clock?"
Ted Lasso
"Speaking as we were mere moments ago, about time,"
Ted Lasso
"I have a branding meeting, so..."
Ted Lasso
"I always feel so bad for the cows,"
Ted Lasso
"but you gotta do it otherwise they get lost."
Ted Lasso
"That was a branding joke."
Ted Lasso
"If we were in Kansas right now,"
Ted Lasso
"I'd just be sitting here waiting for you to finish laughing. Yeah."
Ted Lasso
"I'll see ya tomorrow, okay?"
Ted Lasso
"Then all these guys over here, okay?"
Ted Lasso
"This son of a gun's gonna go all the way down here."
Ted Lasso
"Crystal Palace kicked our booties last week."
Ted Lasso
"And this here, is our current offense that we are running,"
Ted Lasso
"Get rid of it."
Ted Lasso
"Now, you might be wondering why'd I draw all that up there just to erase it."
Ted Lasso
"And that is because I believe in symbolic gestures."
Ted Lasso
"-Didn't. -Really?"
Ted Lasso
"Give the ball to Jamie and everyone else can go to hell."
Ted Lasso
"So, I am officially on the prowl for any new ideas, you hear?"
Ted Lasso
"-You got something, Nate? -No."
Ted Lasso
"So..."
Ted Lasso
"No. No. God, no. Never mind, I'm sorry."
Ted Lasso
"Come on now. You're one of us. Let's go. Fire away. What do you got?"
Ted Lasso
"It's just something that I thought of."
Ted Lasso
"Sorry. Jesus."
Ted Lasso
"Not that one."
Ted Lasso
"You know what, it's not even very good."
Ted Lasso
"It's probably really bad. It's embarrassing even."
Ted Lasso
"-I just-- -Sorry, Nate."
Ted Lasso
"I have a real tricky time hearing folks that don't believe in themselves."
Ted Lasso
"I'm gonna ask you real quick again."
Ted Lasso
"-Do you think this idea will work? -Yeah, I do."
Ted Lasso
"-Why you screaming at us, Nate? -God!"
Ted Lasso
"We're right here."
Ted Lasso
"All right, come on now. Walk us through it."
Ted Lasso
"Okay. So, I thought if we started the attack on the wing,"
Ted Lasso
"Jamie could run through nearside,"
Ted Lasso
"then when the defense follows, Sam could fill his spot."
Ted Lasso
"So, use Jamie as a decoy?"
Ted Lasso
"No."
Ted Lasso
"No. Well, yeah, in-- Yeah, in this case, yes."
Ted Lasso
"Let's give it a shot."
Ted Lasso
"What, you're gonna use my play?"
Ted Lasso
"Yeah. I mean, we're gonna try it on, see if it fits."
Ted Lasso
"You know, it might not."
Ted Lasso
"Then again, it might be a very flattering silhouette,"
Ted Lasso
"and I might wear it right outta the store."
Ted Lasso
"Makes me feel good and I start to strut."
Ted Lasso
"I'm like, "I like this. I like the way this makes me feel.""
Ted Lasso
"Show him your strut, Coach."
Ted Lasso
"Yeah, there you go. Oh, yeah. Yep, that's how to strut."
Ted Lasso
"You look a little angry, but that's all right."
Ted Lasso
"That's my fault. I forgot the pitch is right this way."
Ted Lasso
"Come on, let's go. Strut this way. Here we go."
Ted Lasso
"Still strutting."
Ted Lasso
"-I'll see you later. Yeah. -Yeah."
Ted Lasso
"Ted! Hey, have you got a minute?"
Ted Lasso
"-Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everything okay? -Yeah, yeah. No, it's fine, yeah."
Ted Lasso
"-It's not fine. Everything's shit. -Oh, no."
Ted Lasso
"This was gonna be the front page of The Sun today."
Ted Lasso
""Manager Shags Star Player's Girlfriend.""
Ted Lasso
"I think a more accurate headline would be,"
Ted Lasso
""Manager Innocently Feeds Young Woman Whose Relationship Does Not Define Her.""
Ted Lasso
"Except I look insanely fit in this picture."
Ted Lasso
"Yeah, no, it's beautiful light."
Ted Lasso
"My friend who works at the paper said he can hold this story for one day"
Ted Lasso
"When this shit hits, Jamie is going to go mental."
Ted Lasso
"There's going to be photographers all over us."
Ted Lasso
"Right, right."
Ted Lasso
"The next picture of me will not be this perfect."
Ted Lasso
"I am gonna be mid-sneeze face, like--"
Ted Lasso
""Jamie's Tart Breaks Tartt's Heart.""
Ted Lasso
"-Everyone would read that. -Of course they would."
Ted Lasso
"You have no idea the power of rhyming in this goddamn country."
Ted Lasso
"Yeah."
Ted Lasso
""Lasso Makes Passo and Creates Team Fiasco.""
Ted Lasso
"Keeley's got bars."
Ted Lasso
"Yeah, I'm cute as a button and I can rhyme my ass off."
Ted Lasso
"God, it's no wonder they want to destroy me."
Ted Lasso
"Yeah, yeah."
Ted Lasso
"Sorry, it took me so long to get up the stairs."
Ted Lasso
"I was... stopped to talk by about a hundred people."
Ted Lasso
"Still nothing."
Ted Lasso
"Get someone to run the story about Ted and Keeley."
Ted Lasso
"-Hey, boss. -Ted! And Keeley. Hello."
Ted Lasso
"Hey, I found that in the hall. Yeah."
Ted Lasso
"So, we got ourselves a situation here."
Ted Lasso
"Go ahead, show her the picture, yeah."
Ted Lasso
"See? And the fucking Sun is running it tomorrow."
Ted Lasso
"Honestly, these people,"
Ted Lasso
"they just have no regard for people's privacy and dignity."
Ted Lasso
"Yeah, I'm gonna find the piece of shit that took this and who hired them."
Ted Lasso
"Really? Oh, my God. Thank you."
Ted Lasso
"See, what I tell ya, huh?"
Ted Lasso
"This woman right here is strong, confident and powerful."
Ted Lasso
"Boss, I tell ya, I'd hate to see you and Michelle Obama arm wrestle,"
Ted Lasso
"That's not a compliment I've had before."
Ted Lasso
"-You do have perfect action figure-y arms. -Yeah."
Ted Lasso
"-All right. Yeah. -Thank you."
Ted Lasso
"-Okay. -See y'all later."
Ted Lasso
"-Yes. -What do you mean "yes"?"
Ted Lasso
"I'm not a spy, Rebecca. I'm just the director of football operations."
Ted Lasso
"And equally proficient at both."
Ted Lasso
"Switch to Bumbercatch."
Ted Lasso
"Nice play, Nate. How you feel?"
Ted Lasso
"Kinda like getting your first pube, right?"
Ted Lasso
"-Yeah. What? -Here we go."
Ted Lasso
"All right. Hey. Nice work."
Ted Lasso
"Okay, now, gentlemen,"
Ted Lasso
"here's the other thing we're gonna start focusing on."
Ted Lasso
"Making quicker transitions from offense to defense."
Ted Lasso
"Y'all gotta start making your hellos goodbyes. You understand?"
Ted Lasso
"Easiest way to get that done well is to do it well."
Ted Lasso
"But aside from that, you gotta be in great shape, right?"
Ted Lasso
"So, we are all gonna run two laps around this field."
Ted Lasso
"Anyone who loses to me has to run four more. Let's go!"
Ted Lasso
"-Okay, come on. What you got? -What's going on?"
Ted Lasso
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