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Clips from How I Met Your Mother - The Rebound Girl (S07E07)

"A bootleg VHS of a very, very popular Korean movie,"
How I Met Your Mother
"this genuine Lenny Vintone purse"
How I Met Your Mother
"and the number of a man who can get me a kidney."
How I Met Your Mother
"Do that on Long Island."
How I Met Your Mother
"Look, Robin, we appreciate that you want us"
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"to stay in the city, but this is what we want."
How I Met Your Mother
"I mean, you understand, right?"
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"Here are a few fun facts"
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"about Long Island."
How I Met Your Mother
"Number one: it's Brooklyn's fart trail."
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"So Barney and I--"
How I Met Your Mother
"and again, going through a tough time,"
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"found an adoption agency Web site"
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"and filled out their online application."
How I Met Your Mother
"Name: Barney Stinson."
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"Ted Mosby."
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"Address..."
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"Oh, put my address in Westchester."
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"They'll want to see we'll be"
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"raising this child in a good environment."
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"You know, the suburbs."
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"What? No."
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"- All my guys are here. - Your guys?"
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"Yeah. You know how I got a guy for everything?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Well, they're all in New York."
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"My suit guy, my shoe guy, my ticket guy, my club guy."
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"And if I don't have a guy for something,"
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"then I have a guy guy to get me a guy."
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"And oddly enough, his name is Guy."
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"Okay, fine. How about this?"
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"We stay in the city during the week, then on the weekend,"
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"country house in the burbs!"
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"This is why bro-parenting works!"
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"Totally!"
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"And with your salary plus my salary,"
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"we can totally afford two places."
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"Oh."
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"What?"
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"So... uh, you're gonna keep your job?"
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"Robin, this discussion is closed."
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"The universe told us to do it, so we're doing it."
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"Well, the universe gets it wrong sometimes."
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"Remember when Marshall was trying to decide between"
How I Met Your Mother
"becoming an environmental lawyer and working at a bank?"
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"That's a funny story."
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"Marshall was fed up with his job at GNB and was"
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"thinking about leaving it all behind,"
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"so he and Lily agreed he should wait for a sign"
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"from the universe to tell him what to do."
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"Then one day..."
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"Of course."
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"It's been right there all along."
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"I have to call Lily."
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"Excuse me. Excuse me, sir."
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"I'm sorry, but, um, can I please borrow your..."
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"- Ernie Hudson? - Yes."
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"Can I borrow your phone?"
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"And did Marshall become a Ghostbuster?"
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"That firehouse is still for sale."
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"Even Ernie Hudson begged you not to go through with that."
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"Oh!"
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"Of course I'm gonna keep my job."
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"Why wouldn't I keep my job?"
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"Well, I mean, this whole architecture thing..."
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"isn't it more of a hobby?"
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"Excuse me?"
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"Forget I said anything."
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"No! No, no, no. We're having this discussion."
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"Architecture is my life's work."
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"Why don't you quit your job? I don't even know"
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"what it is you do for a living."
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""What it is I do for a living?""
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"I work, Ted, 14 hours a day so that our baby can have food"
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"and clothes and a nice house,"
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"while you sit around doodling pictures of buildings."
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"You know what? Screw this. I'm gonna go to the bar."
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"Yeah, right, right, 'cause the answer's always"
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"at the bottom of a bottle!"
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"Wait, wait, wait! Hold it!"
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"Brainstorm. Brainstorm."
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"Nobody quits their job."
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"We get a nanny."
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"No. No banging the nanny."
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"Okay, fine. We'll get two nannies."
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"One for banging, one for childcare."
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"Slash banging. Dibs on both nannies!"
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"Just think of it, Ted, you and me,"
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"living together, with our kid,"
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"my two hot nannies, our pet cobra..."
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"What?"
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"A kid needs a pet cobra, Ted. Don't be a pill about this."
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"And we'll have amazing weeklong parties,"
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"and there'll be swords and ninja stars lying around."
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"That's when I realized:"
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"adopting a baby with a friend? Crazy."
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"Adopting a baby with Barney? Freaking nuts."
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"I can't adopt a baby with you, Barney."
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"Why not?"
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"Because we don't even have one yet"
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"and you're already a terrible father."
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"Oh, I get it."
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"You want one of the nannies."
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"Well, you can't have 'em! They're mine!"
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"Except dibs on the third nanny! Good day!"
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"Which brings us to Thanksgiving."
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"Marshall, Lily and Robin were heading out"
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"to Long Island early to get ready."
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"Okay, how is this even possible?!"
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"'Cause how did we even get it in here?!"
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"Okay, I change my mind. I want an epidural."
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"You guys are crazy."
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"This place is enormous."
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"I mean, look arou..."
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"Have you never heard of overhead lighting?!"
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"You're right."
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"I get it."
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"This place is great."
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"Um, excuse me. Where is the restroom?"
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"Oh. Right there. Oh, good, great."
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"I'm just gonna go in there and..."
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