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Clips from The IT Crowd (2006) - Reynholm vs Reynholm (S04E04)

"What a fantastic woman."
The IT Crowd (2006)
"but give us another chance, as a couple."
The IT Crowd (2006)
"No, Victoria, I'm sorry, it's over."
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"That might be the dog."
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"Heston! I'd like to introduce you to my..."
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"Well, as I said, I'm not a lawyer, so..."
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"have you told her yet?"
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"That's not the same as telling her, Mr. Reynholm."
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"- No! - Oh, come on!"
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"How long have you and Mr. Reynholm known each other?"
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"- About ten years. - Ten years, ten wonderful years."
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"Mrs. Reynholm... Can I call you Victoria?"
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"Flowers grow, trees are cut down,"
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"Oh, I can't do it, I just can't."
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"I didn't know these were edible too."
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"They're not."
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"What's all that?"
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"but please, show a little respect!"
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"What's a pedal stool?"
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"when you admire them, you know, the phrase."
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"She's always been a very aggressive litigator."
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"212 million quid!"
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"But that's enough to bring Reynholm Industries to its knees!"
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"Piss off! I'm going to represent myself."
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"this would actually be a comparatively small amount of talking, what we're doing here."
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"No, that's all right, it's what I pay you for."
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"Look at her. Cold as ice."
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"I had to brush his teeth."
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"- Really? - Yes."
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"Dammit, Jim, I'm a sexy doctor, not a sexy scientist!"
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"certain alien species do not fall under the Hippocratic oath."
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"Female Spock, and you know that!"
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"Victoria, you've spoken about the real me,"
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"Yes, your Honour."
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"Your Honour, may I confer with my relationship manager? What's up, Jen?"
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"I need to prepare a proper defence."
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"The one I just did there was rubbish."
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"Well..."
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"that I think this whole case to be a damp squid."
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"Yes?"
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"What?"
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"What did you say the case was? May I have it read back please?"
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"What does that mean?"
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"Yes, but did you say "damp squid"?"
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"Hence the phrase!"
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"I must say, I find it extraordinary that you, a man in your early 30s,"
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"- I think it's "squid". - I have no further questions."
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"- Everyone has a blind spot! - I said that will be all!"
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"That's electric. That's electric in there."
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"It is not."
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"Chair. It was the chair's fault."
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"She's going to take you to the cleaners, Mr. Reynholm."
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"Yup, I suppose she will."
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"Not just because my teeth had fallen out."
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"Is it okay if I play a DVD?"
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"Then you may proceed."
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"We at Goth2Boss work with goths at various locations around the UK"
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"Now she's a lifeguard in Mumbai!"
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"my divorce proceedings, m'kind fellow?"
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"Scratch away that fake tan"
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"Oh, sorry about that. That's not her."
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"Lying here,"
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"on an expensive trial that has resulted in humiliation."
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"Hooray!"
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"I'm getting oak."
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"And every other day, I take a short helicopter ride"
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"to Heston Blumenthal's restaurant."
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"Last night,"
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"I ate a chocolate radio that still worked in my stomach,"
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"and a flat chicken that was actually a glass of water."
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"Even the menu was edible."
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"They said it wasn't, but I ate it."
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"Sounds like you're living the life of Riley."
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"Well, I actually knew Riley, and yes, there are similarities."
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"Tell me about Victoria."
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"You'll have to forgive me, there's been quite a few Victorias."
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"Your wife?"
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"Oh, my God, my wife, oh yes, Victoria!"
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"The two weeks we were married were unforgettable."
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"She disappeared in mysterious circumstances, did she not?"
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"She vanished while washing the car."
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"Despite a search that lasted nearly five hours, we found nothing."
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"So naturally, we assumed the worst."
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"- You must miss her. - More than words could say."
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"I'd give anything to see her walk through that door right now."
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"Hey, why don't you take your clothes off?"
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"- What? - Come on!"
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"We both knew it was on the cards as soon as I realised you were a woman!"
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"What if someone were to walk in?"
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"I left strict instructions not to be disturbed in case we had sex."
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"There's no way anyone is walking through that door..."
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"Hello, Douglas."
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"Victoria!"
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"But I thought you were dead!"
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"I must say, Douglas, you still don't seem very pleased to see me."
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"No, no, I must have eaten some bad stereo system."
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"- How's the wine? - Exquisite."
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"From the chef's own cellar."
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"What are you doing, Victoria? Last time I saw you, you were..."
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"Washing the car? Yes, I imagine you have many questions."
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"I was under a lot of stress that day, Douglas. I think we both were."
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"We both knew it wasn't working."
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"I picked up my sponge and bucket with a heavy heart that day."
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"The rest is a blank. The next thing I can remember with any clarity"
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"is being on a kayaking holiday two years later."
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"That looks good, what's that?"
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"I sort of wish I'd ordered that."
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"Our invisible desserts have arrived!"
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"I know we weren't happy that second week of our marriage, Douglas,"
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"I don't know."
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"I don't think we can just pick up from where we left off."
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"Oh God!"
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"I forgot you could do that."
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"Maybe we should give it another go!"
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"Nnngh..."
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"Well that is new!"
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"How are you doing that?"
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"Wi-i-i-ife."
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"I want to divorce my wife."
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"- Why are you telling me? - Aren't you with legal?"
The IT Crowd (2006)
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