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Clips from Scrubs - My Porcelain God (S03E03)

"Mr Tenaka here is fatiguing and he needs to be intubated. Any questions?"
Scrubs
"Turk's asked me to be his best man. Any advice?"
Scrubs
"No, not at this moment."
Scrubs
"Probably."
Scrubs
"Newbie, it turns out I do have some best man advice."
Scrubs
"and if you chase after the bouquet, make sure you kick off your pumps"
Scrubs
"Thanks. Thanks for coming back."
Scrubs
"Barbie, are you sure you went into his lungs?"
Scrubs
"It looks like you're blowing up his stomach."
Scrubs
"Dammit, his O2 sat's dropping. Get out of the way, honey."
Scrubs
"A few more seconds, we would have been coding this guy. Take that."
Scrubs
"Actually, it goes a little lower."
Scrubs
"- Let's test these one more time. - You ready?"
Scrubs
"And one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight."
Scrubs
"- Drop it like it's hot. - It is hot!"
Scrubs
"- Put one hand on the floor. - I can't reach."
Scrubs
"- You better feel the burn. - I can feel it burning."
Scrubs
"...there you gotta do things..."
Scrubs
"I'm gonna change."
Scrubs
"Just remind him that the wedding is all about what the woman wants."
Scrubs
"should stand out from the other groomsmen?"
Scrubs
"The ring, please?"
Scrubs
"- You got the ring? - It's gotta be one of these."
Scrubs
"Dr Cox!"
Scrubs
"I'm sorry, Dr Cox. I don't know what to do."
Scrubs
"Carla, if one more annoying thing comes my way,"
Scrubs
"extract that extra air out of Barbie's head and inject it right into my veins."
Scrubs
"Hey, Ace, I want you to find my gardener, Hector, a room."
Scrubs
"He has a case of cellulitis and I need him in tip-top shape by the weekend."
Scrubs
"I'm having my lawn-bowling tournament"
Scrubs
"and if anyone but Hector cuts my grass my game goes to heck."
Scrubs
"What has two thumbs and still doesn't give a crap?"
Scrubs
"This is amazing. I'm your best friend. Now, I'm your best man."
Scrubs
"- What will I be best at next? - How about not talking?"
Scrubs
"One-one-thousand, two-one-thousand. And now I'm best at that."
Scrubs
"- Me or him? - You."
Scrubs
"- What now? - You tell anybody about my toilet?"
Scrubs
"Where are you coming from?"
Scrubs
"I find out you told anybody, I'll beat you with Poppy's nickel sock."
Scrubs
"Why would I tell anyone? And no one has epiphanies on the john."
Scrubs
"Aye, aye, captain."
Scrubs
"When two people collide, a lot of things can happen."
Scrubs
"For some, it can be disaster. For others, it's salvation."
Scrubs
"Excuse me?"
Scrubs
"Hi, I'm Kevin."
Scrubs
"Turk, it's your brother. My business trip got cancelled"
Scrubs
"but I'm not gonna be petty."
Scrubs
"When the tux guy called to confirm Turk's measurements. I gave them to him."
Scrubs
"Just remind him that the wedding is all about what the woman wants."
Scrubs
"- Red is a theme? - Love is the theme!"
Scrubs
"Why make a big deal about something we both know you don't even care about?"
Scrubs
"I better get to work before all the good patients are taken."
Scrubs
"it gives them false hope. So you have to do it perfectly."
Scrubs
"Hey, me too."
Scrubs
"- Are we flirting? - Little bit."
Scrubs
"- and once at the White House. - How are the bathrooms there?"
Scrubs
"No idea, but the fountains are nice. And security? Quick as bunnies."
Scrubs
"I know you've helped out a lot of people and I've got this intubating problem..."
Scrubs
"- I'll be right back. - Where are you going?"
Scrubs
"He's your gardener!"
Scrubs
"Did you hear what I said about being suspended?"
Scrubs
"Tell me you're not waiting to use my roof toilet."
Scrubs
"OK, attention, roof poopers."
Scrubs
"Setting aside the fact that I'll make sure you all live to regret this day,"
Scrubs
"let's keep the magic rolling."
Scrubs
"- There is not a toilet on the roof. - You just said there was."
Scrubs
"You've heard this, "There's a toilet on the roof.""
Scrubs
"- Right, people? - That's right. Ain't nothing up there."
Scrubs
"JD, can I talk to you? Have you seen Carla around?"
Scrubs
"False alarm."
Scrubs
"I can't right now, Turk, I am completely swamped."
Scrubs
"- How about later? - Later's no good."
Scrubs
"I gotta finish telling my whole family that you picked me as your best man."
Scrubs
"Look, that problem I was talking about before."
Scrubs
"Now, the only thing that sets me apart is that my beeper plays,"
Scrubs
"There's no reason we both shouldn't be able to sit on it."
Scrubs
"Yeah, about my career-ending problem..."
Scrubs
"- We must conquer the roof toilet. - Enough about the roof toilet!"
Scrubs
"I've heard about how amazing you are. I'm not leaving until you help me out."
Scrubs
"Dammit. I have to go."
Scrubs
"Thanks."
Scrubs
"That reminds me. Hector, Enid made you a prosciutto and mozzarella sandwich,"
Scrubs
"Screw him."
Scrubs
"That's it! I just have to go and talk to him."
Scrubs
"- Kevin Casey. - Dr Casey, have you seen Turk?"
Scrubs
"Oh, yeah. Nice guy. Good surgeon. Great dancer."
Scrubs
"- I have to go. - Cool. I'll see you tomorrow?"
Scrubs
"Actually, no. I have to go back to my hospital."
Scrubs
"- Why do you have to do that? - Look at it this way."
Scrubs
"I may be leaving here, but I will always be there."
Scrubs
"- I know. - I am so messing with you."
Scrubs
"Thank you."
Scrubs
"have such a big impact and then vanish just like that, never to be seen again."
Scrubs
"Kevin had helped every person he met here."
Scrubs
"Kevin? Has anybody seen Kevin?"
Scrubs
"He didn't say goodbye to a lot of people. Just me, Dr Cox, Carla,"
Scrubs
"Doug, Snoop Dogg intern."
Scrubs
"- Where are my hos at? - I haven't seen them."
Scrubs
"I don't want to sound pathetic, but he didn't even help me."
Scrubs
"He didn't help a lot of people. It was just me and Turk and Carla"
Scrubs
"- Mickhead? No, Mickhead's in rehab. - Was in rehab, Elliot, was."
Scrubs
"He'll never huff paint again."
Scrubs
"But look, if you need help I'm always here for you."
Scrubs
"With intubating, I can't seem to intubate patients anymore."
Scrubs
"- Elliot? - Aunt Lillian?"
Scrubs
"Aunt Lillian?"
Scrubs
"- I need help. - I know you do, sweetie,"
Scrubs
"but I'm out of hair scrunchies. Scram, we're waiting for somebody."
Scrubs
"Go on."
Scrubs
"- He's here. - I want them both out of my office."
Scrubs
"There's a ton of empty beds right here. All you have to do is flick the switch."
Scrubs
"I thought so."
Scrubs
"Yeah, me too."
Scrubs
"I want you to know if there's anything I can do to make your wedding go smoother,"
Scrubs
"just tell me. Even if it's stepping down from being best man."
Scrubs
"The only reason I asked my brother was because I knew he couldn't come."
Scrubs
"- You've been my best friend... - You're my friend..."
Scrubs
"- Man, I love you. - I've known you since college."
Scrubs
"- Cool. - Solid."
Scrubs
"Sure. Is he, in fact, a latex-encased robot with real human hair"
Scrubs
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