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Clips from Scrubs - My House (S06E06)

TV Series 2001 Season 6, Episode 4 21 min ★ 8.2/10 (14,105 ratings) 393 clips
Drama Comedy
God, so many memories. So many, many memories.
"God, so many memories. So many, many memories."
Scrubs
Elliot, your new office is right there.
"Elliot, your new office is right there."
Scrubs
Nothing's gonna change but your lab coat.
"Nothing's gonna change but your lab coat."
Scrubs
whenever I felt like it.
"whenever I felt like it."
Scrubs
That was hot, stud, but I think it's just my leg that's supposed to be up.
"That was hot, stud, but I think it's just my leg that's supposed to be up."
Scrubs
J.D.: Oh, my God, she likes me!
"J.D.: Oh, my God, she likes me!"
Scrubs
and you don't want to be around me when I'm pregnant.
"and you don't want to be around me when I'm pregnant."
Scrubs
All the women in my family go psycho.
"All the women in my family go psycho."
Scrubs
- Yeah, but Kim... - I wasn't finished!
"- Yeah, but Kim... - I wasn't finished!"
Scrubs
(SIGHS)
"(SIGHS)"
Scrubs
so if you want to get near it ever again,
"so if you want to get near it ever again,"
Scrubs
House is a genius.
"House is a genius."
Scrubs
That's it. I'm whacking both of you.
"That's it. I'm whacking both of you."
Scrubs
(BOTH GROAN)
"(BOTH GROAN)"
Scrubs
There aren't any cameras over here. Real medical mysteries don't happen
"There aren't any cameras over here. Real medical mysteries don't happen"
Scrubs
every Sunday. Or, better yet,
"every Sunday. Or, better yet,"
Scrubs
how about why anybody on the planet actually thinks Dane Cook is funny.
"how about why anybody on the planet actually thinks Dane Cook is funny."
Scrubs
but that's what hospitals are. Boring.
"but that's what hospitals are. Boring."
Scrubs
And phone sex is out of the question, because I'm a righty when I talk on
"And phone sex is out of the question, because I'm a righty when I talk on"
Scrubs
Turkleton. I need a word.
"Turkleton. I need a word."
Scrubs
sigh, and give it back to me.
"sigh, and give it back to me."
Scrubs
(SIGHING)
"(SIGHING)"
Scrubs
I invented a machine that prints business cards.
"I invented a machine that prints business cards."
Scrubs
That's already been invented.
"That's already been invented."
Scrubs
also fires paint pellets.
"also fires paint pellets."
Scrubs
Doctor Reid, I thought I would just stop in and say goodbye.
"Doctor Reid, I thought I would just stop in and say goodbye."
Scrubs
Yes, but you won't be working for Sacred Heart, the place that spent
"Yes, but you won't be working for Sacred Heart, the place that spent"
Scrubs
You're like a prostitute that gets paid up-front and then bolts
"You're like a prostitute that gets paid up-front and then bolts"
Scrubs
So, goodbye, Miss Mei Ling of Gentle Oriental Escorts,
"So, goodbye, Miss Mei Ling of Gentle Oriental Escorts,"
Scrubs
and goodbye, Dr. Reid.
"and goodbye, Dr. Reid."
Scrubs
I understand you've been having palpitations and shortness of breath.
"I understand you've been having palpitations and shortness of breath."
Scrubs
That's so sweet.
"That's so sweet."
Scrubs
Unfortunately, Kim was taken, so I tried Kim with two M's, Kim with three M's,
"Unfortunately, Kim was taken, so I tried Kim with two M's, Kim with three M's,"
Scrubs
- Kim-1, Kim-2... - Well, what's it called?
"- Kim-1, Kim-2... - Well, what's it called?"
Scrubs
Yes.
"Yes."
Scrubs
J.D.: That was so lucky.
"J.D.: That was so lucky."
Scrubs
How could I ever leave you?
"How could I ever leave you?"
Scrubs
(PAINTBALL GUN FIRING)
"(PAINTBALL GUN FIRING)"
Scrubs
Dr. Cox, I need your help.
"Dr. Cox, I need your help."
Scrubs
Say no more.
"Say no more."
Scrubs
Whether it's reading the paper or shaving the sideburns off
"Whether it's reading the paper or shaving the sideburns off"
Scrubs
By my calculations, that rant just cost me $27.
"By my calculations, that rant just cost me $27."
Scrubs
- Excuse me, Dr. Cox? - Yes, Party Doc?
"- Excuse me, Dr. Cox? - Yes, Party Doc?"
Scrubs
Maybe she got postpartum depression.
"Maybe she got postpartum depression."
Scrubs
- What? - I can't do it.
"- What? - I can't do it."
Scrubs
- Good afternoon. - What's up?
"- Good afternoon. - What's up?"
Scrubs
Oh, Dr. Kelso, what radiologist is on call today?
"Oh, Dr. Kelso, what radiologist is on call today?"
Scrubs
Oh, right. The silent treatment.
"Oh, right. The silent treatment."
Scrubs
Well, unfortunately for you, the Reid family has actually been
"Well, unfortunately for you, the Reid family has actually been"
Scrubs
There was one time my dad wasn't talking to my mom because
"There was one time my dad wasn't talking to my mom because"
Scrubs
I know. She wasn't thinking.
"I know. She wasn't thinking."
Scrubs
Lollipop
"Lollipop"
Scrubs
He was about to crack, Ted. What the hell?
"He was about to crack, Ted. What the hell?"
Scrubs
Well, your labs are back and it's definitely heart failure,
"Well, your labs are back and it's definitely heart failure,"
Scrubs
Wow.
"Wow."
Scrubs
J.D.: Or why a friend is mad at you instead of the guy being the jerk.
"J.D.: Or why a friend is mad at you instead of the guy being the jerk."
Scrubs
Finally.
"Finally."
Scrubs
J.D.: I had to think of a new plan to keep Kim from leaving.
"J.D.: I had to think of a new plan to keep Kim from leaving."
Scrubs
The only thing worse than not knowing why a patient is crashing
"The only thing worse than not knowing why a patient is crashing"
Scrubs
is being offered help by the hospital's grief counselor, Dr. Eadrick.
"is being offered help by the hospital's grief counselor, Dr. Eadrick."
Scrubs
Need help, old friend?
"Need help, old friend?"
Scrubs
Oh, yeah. Her kidneys are failing.
"Oh, yeah. Her kidneys are failing."
Scrubs
You know, maybe instead of lashing out at me
"You know, maybe instead of lashing out at me"
Scrubs
you should turn that anger gun at the person you're really mad at.
"you should turn that anger gun at the person you're really mad at."
Scrubs
Turk, I just need a break from the baby.
"Turk, I just need a break from the baby."
Scrubs
it's lost all of its meaning.
"it's lost all of its meaning."
Scrubs
to describe how I feel about others.
"to describe how I feel about others."
Scrubs
I mega-loathe you all. Good day.
"I mega-loathe you all. Good day."
Scrubs
and he's gonna help me with your diagnosis.
"and he's gonna help me with your diagnosis."
Scrubs
Now, leave before I put a rhinestone collar around your neck,
"Now, leave before I put a rhinestone collar around your neck,"
Scrubs
- Again, teammates. Okay. - Go.
"- Again, teammates. Okay. - Go."
Scrubs
- You are single. - That's right.
"- You are single. - That's right."
Scrubs
It's go time.
"It's go time."
Scrubs
Oh, yes, I am, Kim.
"Oh, yes, I am, Kim."
Scrubs
and I was always going to want you not to.
"and I was always going to want you not to."
Scrubs
- You do. - Gotta confess, though.
"- You do. - Gotta confess, though."
Scrubs
Uh-oh.
"Uh-oh."
Scrubs
Great.
"Great."
Scrubs
Hey, Elliot, you gonna finish that muffin?
"Hey, Elliot, you gonna finish that muffin?"
Scrubs
J.D.: Around here, sometimes you do wish it was more like TV.
"J.D.: Around here, sometimes you do wish it was more like TV."
Scrubs
and conveniently solve everything.
"and conveniently solve everything."
Scrubs
Our little orange friend, Mr. Mehleison.
"Our little orange friend, Mr. Mehleison."
Scrubs
and tomatoes turn you red, what color would he most likely turn
"and tomatoes turn you red, what color would he most likely turn"
Scrubs
- Orange. - Correct. And Gandhi,
"- Orange. - Correct. And Gandhi,"
Scrubs
I understand that you are confused
"I understand that you are confused"
Scrubs
Now, Newbie, as far as your patient is concerned,
"Now, Newbie, as far as your patient is concerned,"
Scrubs
Takosobu Cardiomyopathy.
"Takosobu Cardiomyopathy."
Scrubs
Takosobu Cardiomyopathy, also known as "Broken Heart Syndrome,"
"Takosobu Cardiomyopathy, also known as "Broken Heart Syndrome,""
Scrubs
Turns out her husband had just died
"Turns out her husband had just died"
Scrubs
I'm betting that her grief over his passing
"I'm betting that her grief over his passing"
Scrubs
And, no, no, I'm not Superman.
"And, no, no, I'm not Superman."
Scrubs
I mean, how are you supposed to treat that?
"I mean, how are you supposed to treat that?"
Scrubs
(MACHINE BEEPING NORMALLY)
"(MACHINE BEEPING NORMALLY)"
Scrubs
Possible side effects of kittens include sneezing,
"Possible side effects of kittens include sneezing,"
Scrubs
tiny scratches and erectile dysfunction.
"tiny scratches and erectile dysfunction."
Scrubs
Next time, just remember to take care of your patient emotionally.
"Next time, just remember to take care of your patient emotionally."
Scrubs
well, that can destroy the body, the mind... It can destroy anything.
"well, that can destroy the body, the mind... It can destroy anything."
Scrubs
I couldn't let you leave without you knowing
"I couldn't let you leave without you knowing"
Scrubs
Look, we're gonna talk every night,
"Look, we're gonna talk every night,"
Scrubs
for phone sex and we're gonna get through it.
"for phone sex and we're gonna get through it."
Scrubs
Don't be ridiculous. I've been with a lot of big girls.
"Don't be ridiculous. I've been with a lot of big girls."
Scrubs
Oh, yeah?
"Oh, yeah?"
Scrubs
J.D.: The best part of a great mystery is its resolution.
"J.D.: The best part of a great mystery is its resolution."
Scrubs
Whether you finally realized what your friend was looking for...
"Whether you finally realized what your friend was looking for..."
Scrubs
- So, tell me about your new job. - It's amazing.
"- So, tell me about your new job. - It's amazing."
Scrubs
Am I ever going to look normal again?
"Am I ever going to look normal again?"
Scrubs
Oh, sure, sure, as long as you cut back on your vegetables.
"Oh, sure, sure, as long as you cut back on your vegetables."
Scrubs
Maybe, I don't know, buy some clothes from this decade.
"Maybe, I don't know, buy some clothes from this decade."
Scrubs
Turk, I can't handle going home right now.
"Turk, I can't handle going home right now."
Scrubs
Don't look at me. I wasn't crying.
"Don't look at me. I wasn't crying."
Scrubs
I just need a break from the baby.
"I just need a break from the baby."
Scrubs
J.D.: Elliot had just finished her last shift at Sacred Heart
"J.D.: Elliot had just finished her last shift at Sacred Heart"
Scrubs
before starting her new career in private practice.
"before starting her new career in private practice."
Scrubs
I can't believe it's all over.
"I can't believe it's all over."
Scrubs
On the up side, I could give her dramatic "don't-go" kisses
"On the up side, I could give her dramatic "don't-go" kisses"
Scrubs
This is going to be such a tough decision,
"This is going to be such a tough decision,"
Scrubs
'cause I don't know if you're aware of this,
"'cause I don't know if you're aware of this,"
Scrubs
- but I've been really digging you lately. - Oh, I'm aware, baby.
"- but I've been really digging you lately. - Oh, I'm aware, baby."
Scrubs
Still, I'd only be gone four months,
"Still, I'd only be gone four months,"
Scrubs
It's perfectly fine. Just hit the wall.
"It's perfectly fine. Just hit the wall."
Scrubs
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