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Clips from 30 Rock - Idiots Are People Two! (S06E06)

"Crisis mode is when I down a couple of sleeping pills"
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"with scotch, pass out in my secret napping place,"
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"and hope I dream about that latina security guard."
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"The one you always kiss on the mouth."
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"That's normal in Guatemala."
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"Oh."
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"They're both skills you need"
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"I don't even know what he'll say,"
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"There! My pink fluorescents."
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"They're the same lights poultry farms use to keep the birds"
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"from pecking each other to death."
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"Are you as turned on as I am right now?"
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"Oh, we have to clean this up."
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""Fluorescent lights contain Mercury.""
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"I'm well aware of that, Kenneth."
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"I faked Mercury poisoning to get out of my contract"
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"- - The musical."
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""If broken, remove all people and pets from the room"?"
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"Why? Are there fumes?"
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"Are we breathing Mercury fumes right now?"
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"Kenneth. I'm going to tell you what I told Phil Spector."
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""We just have to get some trash bags"
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"Then we can keep recording my album.""
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"I think I saw Billy Dee Williams in riverside park this morning"
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"when I was meeting dogs."
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"Is that an Armenian name?"
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"Is he a space Armenian?"
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"The Kardashians are Armenian, they're into black guys,"
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"so there's something to it..."
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"at the ends of sentences."
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"That's very masculine."
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"Oh, my. Is that a tan line on Criss' thumb?"
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"Did Criss used to wear a thumb ring?"
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"Oh, better hold on to this one."
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"He's getting a free muffin soon."
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"Wow, I've never seen a sunglass hut credit card before."
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"Oh, a ukulele with an Obama sticker on it."
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"That was a gift from Criss' kickball team."
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"Which totally supports your theory that the phillie phanatic"
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"is biologically a female."
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"that thing definitely has a menstrual cycle."
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"I'm in your head."
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"We're here, we're proud, I came up with this rhyme!"
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"The so-called idiot community will not be silenced."
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"We are legion. We are America."
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"Frat guys, DJs, loud-mouthed old bitches,"
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"investment bankers, the tramp-stamped,"
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"parrot-heads, anti-vaccination crusaders,"
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"and people who won't shut up about scuba diving."
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"It's a whole other world down there."
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"And our celebrity spokesperson,"
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"actress Denise Richards."
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"That's right. I'm an idiot. Surprised?"
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"Well, I am. For all "intensive purposes.""
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"Our community is mobilized now, L.L."
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"And we're not leaving until we're heard."
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"You can't ignore us, Liz Lemon."
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"We will be out here every day, misremembering movie quotes."
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"Because as Braveheart said,"
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""you can take our freedom, unless you take our lives.""
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"Say you approve of Criss, Jack."
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"Am I in your head, Lemon?"
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"Yes, but don't be so proud."
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"I also have a lot of imaginary arguments"
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"with the couples on house hunters."
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"Why can't people look past paint color?"
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"I've never met."
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"because you won't approve of him."
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"Well, then I guess this is a catch-22."
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"Although I don't know for sure, because I refuse to read"
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"Look, clearly I hurt your feelings."
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"You're upset that I didn't tell you about Criss."
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"No, no, no, I'm quite over your subterfuge,"
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"although I do expect a note of apology."
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"And don't try to make it funny. Just apologize."
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"But I feel like people expect comedy..."
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"They don't."
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"It's exhausting."
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"However, you're right that I am having an emotional reaction."
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"It's very frustrating to watch someone I care about"
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"do something she clearly knows is bad for her,"
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"like that week you wore those blue contact lenses."
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"I looked like Adriana Lima."
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"And you don't know that Criss is bad for me,"
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"So you better get on board the Criss train."
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"Criss-a, Criss, Criss, Criss-a,"
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"Criss-a, Criss-a, Criss-a, Criss-a,"
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"Criss train!"
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"Do you have any water?"
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"You know what, Lemon?"
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"Fine. You are technically an adult."
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"You can do whatever you want."
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"Really? So I won?"
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"With the train thing?"
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"I won't ask any questions about Criss again."
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"Promise. With two "s"s."
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"I would, however, like to ask you why Tracy is outside"
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"cursing this network on a megaphone."
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"It's a good one, Jack."
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"He what? No, no, no, no, no. We need idiots."
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"Who do you think is watching your show?"
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"Funky taste-makers?"
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"jet blue passengers who fall asleep with the TV on,"
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"pets whose owners have died, and, uh, idiots."
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"I don't know what to say to those people."
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"You wrote "remember to DVR Kendra" on your hand."
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"I think you can handle it."
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"Ah, no, damn it."
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"Jiminy Cricket, copyright Walt Disney company, 1940!"
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"Mr. Hornberger? Sir?"
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"Pete!"
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"It's Jenna! The woman you're in love with!"
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"What's wrong with him?"
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"Is this because of the Mercury?"
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"What does the box say?"
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"visit our website." We need a computer."
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"Poor Mr. Hornberger."
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"He came in here to do something for the show,"
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"We have to get help."
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"Think, you fool."
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