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Clips from Community - Home Economics (S01E01)

"Jeez, you are way out of your element here."
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"Yes, and I do not believe a single word I am saying for me."
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"But for you, maybe you're one of those rare people"
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"with nothing underneath the surface."
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"Maybe if you put stain remover on a turd,"
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"you don't get a diamond."
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"- Faucets. - Italian faucets, handcrafted."
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"Wait..."
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"I made this notch to indicate optimal cleansing temperature"
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"These were mine?"
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"For a fancy condo, you've got awful security."
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"you can look down and think,"
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""I was a huge phony before. I can do it again!""
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"Look at all this work you're doing just to have me around again."
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"You were may more attracted to me than you were willing to admit."
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"Also, do me a favor, will you lay off Britta?"
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"but underneath all that clown makeup,"
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"I've moved on."
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"Snakes. What?"
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"Do you guys mind?"
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"It's an heirloom. I want it back."
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"Have a nice date."
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"His body made of wrinkles and folds."
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"Stupid and ugly, he smell like a fart,"
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"the poo-poo in his pants and poo-poo in my heart."
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"I saw how much you missed me,"
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"and realized the world was better off with me in it."
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"You look like you moved out."
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"Yep."
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"East side, west side, North side, south"
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"When you come after Pierce, Then the battle is on"
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"Look, I'm Annie's backpack."
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"Randi?"
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"The guy with the tiny nipples you did it with."
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"I lived in my car for a stretch in the '70s."
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"on the vinyl backseat of a Skylark."
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"I'd like to be there when the band finds out."
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"The next person that offers me charity or pity"
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"Thanks for your advice about "a night under the stars"."
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"Of course. Anytime. Ever."
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"Handcrafted in Italy. 100% expensive."
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"Maybe even become one."
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"- You're attracted to bums. - Good night."
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"she realized she was happier being poor and rising four boys with Kurt Russell."
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"I'm going to roll them. I am. I just..."
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"- I'm getting rid of the b. - She's a gdb."
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"Great to have somebody to watch stuff with."
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"Do you guys even have faucets in here?"
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"Your song. We wrote it together."
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"Or because I'm not a small-nippled,"
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"credit-hogging jag who only knows three power cords."
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"Oh, yeah, totally."
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"Right."
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"Remember when you pretended to be my backpack?"
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"My appendix is bursting."
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"Okay, we have to quarantine you. We got to get you to a safe distance."
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"Don't be naive. The charge between you was keeping him going."
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"Thanks, coach. Can you turn the tv back on?"
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"These look like..."
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"for combination skin."
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"when you're spending way too much time on your hair,"
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"Yeah. Clearly."
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"I am out."
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"She may walk like she just got off a horse,"
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"No worries, man."
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"Thank you."
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"Look who the cat dragged out and licked clean."
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"You would've been fine with me staying there forever?"
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"So this rap goes out, To stupid Vaughn"
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"This isn't over."
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"Class dismissed."
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"Brittles, I forgot to tell you, I went and talked to Vaughn."
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"I've got to pay some fees"
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"Tv never came home drunk."
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"I'm funny."
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"I got to go get ady."
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"Think I've been to this dance before."
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"Well played Pierce."
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"unless you count Cop Rock."
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"It will be..."
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"Sometimes I like to pour hot cocoa mix into cold milk"
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"Excuse me, I have a future murder victim to visit."
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"No, your incredulity perplexes me, nerd."
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"This song's for Pierce 'cause he's so old"
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"Pierce, you're a b."
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"I don't care what you think. For me, that was huge."
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"I'm Pierce."
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"I couldn't have done this without your help."
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"Pierce, I don't need you in my band."
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"Hands aids."
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"I'm not living in my car."
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"and then they'll put my locks back on the door and that'll be that."
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"You're missing the headline."
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"I'm kind of the hawkeye around here so it's kind of a..."
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"Excuse me, Pierce's band is playing"
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"I don't think so."
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"Then he goes to school, Where he's stupid again"
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"If he's not interested, I could lose the friendship too."
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"They're pretty good. This isn't weird for you?"
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"You want that? How you like that?"
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"Vaughn's breath is so bad, His butts mad at his mouth"
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"And in this case, it is definitely a girl."
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"Thanks for your help."
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"The bad news is I could not patch up things between you."
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"I'm sorry, I'm not good at being coy."
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"Stay with me."
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"I got to figure out what to bring to the picnic."
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"Look at those faucets."
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"Stop! That's my house!"
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"The premise alone is priceless."
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"In the last two days, I spent a quarter."
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"Could you come here, please, for a second?"
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"And she'll feel like the luckiest girl in the world."
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"We should've hung out more in high school."
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"- My date's on the east lawn. - East lawn. Perfect."
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"You just get a turd with less direction in life."
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"Install those in a new apartment so that every day,"
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"I was doing this all for Abed. You are the worst."
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"- Lates! - Lates. Okay."
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"Could you scoot over?"
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