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Clips from Fresh Off the Boat - Home Sweet Home-School (S01E01)

"and telling them they're stickers."
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"and are then on drugs."
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"Yes, you in back."
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"Hey, Nancy!"
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"That coupon is expired."
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"How'd she see that?"
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"I see everything."
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"It is a garnish, not a salad."
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"Mitch, did you just take a crouton from the salad bar?"
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"Okay, I will. Love you!"
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"- There's nothing in my backpack. - Oh, I know."
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"Plus/minus rainbow? One leprechaun?"
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"Two clouds... that seems bad."
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"No, clouds are good."
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"Just when you think you've won the game,"
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"about a straight- "A" student."
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"Chinese learning center... an after-school program"
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"Yes!"
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"called animal encounters"
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"In fact, I have a baby chick in my lap right now."
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"To Spencer and his four C's."
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"Uh, but the lady at table six asked for it."
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"doesn't mean you can't provide it for the boys."
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"a "wheel of fortune" puzzle you couldn't figure out?"
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"I mean, what would I do at the restaurant?"
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"Oh, hey, man."
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"We do, we do. Sorry."
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"I put you in an awkward spot."
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"Infraction... not nice.""
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"Oh!"
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"I never get to have that much fun."
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"I want you to feel like"
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"That's how I want to feel."
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"You and I, we're gonna have a crouton together, okay?"
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"- Cheers. - Cheers."
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"Very good."
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"All right."
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"Okay. Just one more. Nice. Okay."
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"- We should do that all the time. - No."
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"Dad, mom is crazy."
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"Okay."
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"I don't need any extra napkins. Thank you."
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"I guess so."
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"Really?"
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"Ask him yourself."
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"Everybody having a good time?"
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"or perhaps a blooming onion?"
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"What are we paying in rent?"
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"Why am I the only one who cares that we are losing money?"
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"They are about to dine and dash."
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"How? By killing them with kindness,"
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"You're gonna dine and dash"
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"because you think it's fun and nobody gets hurt."
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"But this is a family business."
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"I thought this was a Golden Saddle."
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"That's sweet. Aww."
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"Yeah."
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"In fact, we're struggling just to break even."
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"we can work something out."
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"Thanks, guys. I appreciate it."
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"I talked to them the way that I would want to be talked to,"
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"Oh, crap!"
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"Hey."
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"I'm going to cook dinner with it tonight."
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"But all his employees respect and admire him,"
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"My point is,"
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"I don't know why, but it's warm!"
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"Yeah, what we did was wrong."
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"sliced beef with peppers and onions,"
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"maybe some rice, also."
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"Love you!"
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"I missed all the fun."
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"Wait, I almost forgot."
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"Close."
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"Unless the bear's hat is black."
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"So..."
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"As a kid, there are things that terrify you."
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"Parents, thank you all for coming."
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"We know you're very busy, but we felt"
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"This man has been seen in the area"
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"handing out drugs to children"
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"Thchildren then proceed to lick the stickers"
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"We are working closely with local authorities,"
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"so any additional precautions could be taken."
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"When do report cards come out?"
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"In my family, that's what terrified us."
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"S01E02 Home Sweet Home-School"
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"because my dad thought it would help business."
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"Well, happy anniversary."
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"I can't imagine it."
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"You have to check the date."
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"Uh, the voice of an angel, the incredible singing lady."
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"- Okay. - Okay, okay."
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"What are you doing?"
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"The restaurant has been open almost a month,"
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"and we have been losing money every day."
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"We have tighten up around here,"
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"or we will never turn a profit."
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"Is that why you clog half the pepper holes?"
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"Oh, look at that guy,"
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"shaking away our profits like he's a pepper monster."
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"we need to get on the same page,"
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"and my page says"
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"the key to success is to kill them with kindness."
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"- I've always... shh! - Did you hear that?"
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"Are you saying I did not hear a crunch?"
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"You are trying to dissolve the crouton."
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"Uh, Mitch, why don't you go see"
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"You waiting r your report card?"
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"Yeah, and a birthday card from my dad."
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"If it's within three weeks of your birthday,"
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"then it still counts."
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"I've got a forgery kit in my room."
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"before my mom comes home."
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"- Sweet. - Yeah."
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"I'm not making the same rookie mistake I made last year."
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"You love me? What are you hiding?"
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"B-minus!"
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"Is there anything else for me?"
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"Buddy, we talked about this."
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