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Clips from Meet the Parents

"Dad, that's kinda weird."
Meet the Parents
"That's right."
Meet the Parents
"How did you teach the cat to use the toilet?"
Meet the Parents
"Easy. I designed a litter box to put inside the toilet."
Meet the Parents
"Oh! That's... Yeah, makes sense."
Meet the Parents
"I had to move all my plants."
Meet the Parents
"Plus you got another guy in the house to leave the seat up."
Meet the Parents
"He can't lift the seat. He lacks the strength and opposable thumbs."
Meet the Parents
"Ah, right. 0pposable... Didn't think about that."
Meet the Parents
"Jinx is a house cat. He can't go out. He lacks survival skills."
Meet the Parents
"I don't think Greg will be playing with Jinxy. He hates cats."
Meet the Parents
"Pam, I don't hate cats."
Meet the Parents
"I don't... I just happen to be more of a dog lover."
Meet the Parents
"Yeah. Yeah."
Meet the Parents
"Well, it's OK if you hate cats, Greg."
Meet the Parents
"I don't. I don't hate cats...at all."
Meet the Parents
"That's OK. Just be honest about it. There's some things I hate."
Meet the Parents
"Why don't we let the kids freshen up?"
Meet the Parents
"Greg, we'll get you something to wear from Jack's closet."
Meet the Parents
"OK."
Meet the Parents
"- Oh, honey. - Yeah?"
Meet the Parents
"I'm so happy you're home, sweetheart."
Meet the Parents
"Me, too, Daddy."
Meet the Parents
"Hey, listen, be nice to this one, OK?"
Meet the Parents
"Thank you."
Meet the Parents
"Shirt fit OK, Greg?"
Meet the Parents
"Fantastic. Thanks, Jack."
Meet the Parents
"Good. Tom Collins coming up."
Meet the Parents
"I wish you hadn't said that I hate cats."
Meet the Parents
"But you didn't have to say right when we met."
Meet the Parents
"I'm sorry. It just slipped out."
Meet the Parents
"Get your red hot pu-pus!"
Meet the Parents
"My goodness! What is that?"
Meet the Parents
"Oh, that's just... a little something from me."
Meet the Parents
"Go ahead, open it up."
Meet the Parents
"Oh, look, honey. Greg brought us a present!"
Meet the Parents
"Oh, isn't that nice?"
Meet the Parents
"Look at this. It's a flower pot... with the dirt in it."
Meet the Parents
"Mm."
Meet the Parents
"Which, I was told,"
Meet the Parents
"is one of the rarest and most beautiful flowers in existence."
Meet the Parents
"From the Jerusalis tulipizius genus, yes, yes."
Meet the Parents
"Anyway, the guy said with regular watering"
Meet the Parents
"Well, we'll look forward to that."
Meet the Parents
"(Pam clears throat)"
Meet the Parents
"So, uh, Greg, how's your job?"
Meet the Parents
"Um, good, Pam. Thanks for asking."
Meet the Parents
"I recently got transferred to triage."
Meet the Parents
"Is that better than a nurse?"
Meet the Parents
"- Well... - No. They do."
Meet the Parents
"Not many men in your profession."
Meet the Parents
"No, Jack. Not traditionally."
Meet the Parents
"Mm-hm."
Meet the Parents
"Pam, did you know that your father started his own business?"
Meet the Parents
"Really? Dad, that's great!"
Meet the Parents
"Oh, wow!"
Meet the Parents
"Yes, I thought with my experience, why let retirement stop me?"
Meet the Parents
"So what is it? What's...? What's the new venture?"
Meet the Parents
"Oh, let me ask you a question, Greg."
Meet the Parents
"Let's say you have kids and you wanna get out of the house, you know?"
Meet the Parents
"So you hire a baby-sitter, someone you think you can trust."
Meet the Parents
"References, experience - all check out fine."
Meet the Parents
"But, how do you know for certain"
Meet the Parents
"that your loved ones are safe with this stranger?"
Meet the Parents
"I mean, can you ever really trust another human being, Greg?"
Meet the Parents
"Sure. I think so."
Meet the Parents
"Take a look at this, Greg."
Meet the Parents
"It looks like a teddy bear."
Meet the Parents
"Smile. You're on nanny camera!"
Meet the Parents
"Oh! Oh!"
Meet the Parents
"I've seen these advertised on TV."
Meet the Parents
"Not like this you haven't. Take a look."
Meet the Parents
"- Oh, my gosh. - Oh."
Meet the Parents
"Hi. Where's the other camera?"
Meet the Parents
"Right here in this decorative artifact."
Meet the Parents
"- That's great. - 0ur cameras are motion activated."
Meet the Parents
"We can hide them in mirrors, lamps, you name it."
Meet the Parents
"Greg, when you have little Fockers running around,"
Meet the Parents
"(Pam) Yeah."
Meet the Parents
"(Phone)"
Meet the Parents
"- I'll get that. - I'll get it."
Meet the Parents
"OK."
Meet the Parents
"Any problem with the documents?"
Meet the Parents
"You gotta be careful if you call here."
Meet the Parents
"If I don't answer,"
Meet the Parents
"use a southern accent and ask for the vegetarian special."
Meet the Parents
"(Pam) And the wedding's on Sunday?"
Meet the Parents
"Oh, that wasn't the airline, was it?"
Meet the Parents
"No, wrong number. We're out of Collins, so I'll go to the store."
Meet the Parents
"I thought I just bought some."
Meet the Parents
"You know how that stuff just goes. Back in a jif."
Meet the Parents
"Well, why doesn't Greg go with you?"
Meet the Parents
"You'll need something in case your suitcase doesn't show up."
Meet the Parents
"- I'm sure it'll show up. - Yeah."
Meet the Parents
"Don't take a chance. You don't even have a toothbrush. Go on."
Meet the Parents
"Yeah."
Meet the Parents
"Why would I need privacy?"
Meet the Parents
"- Bye. - Have fun, you guys."
Meet the Parents
"He is. We have the best time together."
Meet the Parents
"Good."
Meet the Parents
"- Now, have you two been mm-mm-mm? - Mother!"
Meet the Parents
"No! Thinking about anything permanent?"
Meet the Parents
"I definitely have the feeling this is it."
Meet the Parents
"Oh."
Meet the Parents
"Absolutely."
Meet the Parents
"It's a big day Saturday."
Meet the Parents
"Yes."
Meet the Parents
"- Premium. - Uh-huh."
Meet the Parents
"I know we haven't been together that long,"
Meet the Parents
"but the time that we have spent together has been incredible."
Meet the Parents
"I just...I just prefer dogs."
Meet the Parents
"You come home, they're..."
Meet the Parents
"wagging their little tails, happy to see you."
Meet the Parents
"You need that assurance, do you?"
Meet the Parents
"I..."
Meet the Parents
"and covers his genitals, his ears go down."
Meet the Parents
"They don't sell out like dogs."
Meet the Parents
"(Music starts on stereo)"
Meet the Parents
"Yes, I do. I'm a big fan."
Meet the Parents
"Puff, the magic dragon"
Meet the Parents
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