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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Two Turkeys (S05E05)

"- Gobble! Gobble!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Charles, you gotta stop. - Nah."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Dude. - Gobble."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Gobble--wait, what?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"[screeches]"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"[upbeat music]"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"*"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- All right, you know the drill."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It goes down today and we only get one shot."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Thanksgiving 2017, the meeting of the parents."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"they will bond, and then when the time is right,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"They are traditional, reserved,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I wouldn't say I'm controlling."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and my mom's a flighty weirdo. - This is gonna be a disaster."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"This is perfect."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Yeah, but that's bottom of the barrel stuff."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I'm really impressed. - Oh, well, you know,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- No, you hold brownies from the side."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It's room temperature. - Look at the finger spread,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Well, at the Jeffords' house, it's not just Thanksgiving,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I'm already out of the shower."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Jake told me you were Cuban."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- And I'm Camila. - Oh."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- The stuffing's inside it and now we have two turkeys,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Why don't we just get comfortable."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Feliz Thanksgiving. How was the trip in?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Hey, Dad? - This holiday is the worst."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Is everything okay, sir? - No, it is not."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I went to a meeting and when I returned,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Calm down, there's no need to point fingers."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- How dare you. You have no proof."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- There's crumbs all over your desks."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Bread, cookie, pizza, sandwich, blintz,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and all will be forgiven."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- What? You did? Why were you looking?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I love this new ceramic that you painted."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Completely. - I just always found canvas"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"so that he could spend his Sunday's cheating on me."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Okay, this is bad."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Actually, my dad is super competitive too."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"That doesn't count. - Yikes."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Exactly."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Now, as for you three,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"How long you been planning this?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Your words not mine."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I didn't do it, Kevin. - Don't you say his name."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I know you didn't mean to do it."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"You just got hungry,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I didn't take your pie. - You're lying!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"when the pie went missing? - I was at the grocery store"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"buying goose feet for Nikolaj's dinner."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I was getting the oil changed in my bike."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Preparing for my solo Thanksgiving ride."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Ava's birthday/Thanksgiving dinner's a high-caloric affair."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Terry needs to earn that feast."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and your parents are not recoiling."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- A-top them off."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Every night I'm told what to do"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"but yet I cannot escape your scold."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"What am I? An alarm clock."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"with Sully Sullenberger. - What he did was amazing."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"at the destination without killing any of those birds."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- No, no, no, no, no more for me."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"In fact, I think everyone here has had enough."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- We have? - Yes."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- It's about time you came to us."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"on someone's breath. - We need surveillance footage"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Well, then get on the damned phone"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"[laughter]"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Babe, our parents are vibing hard."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I have a toast too. - Oh."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Uh-oh, they're getting competitive."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- It goes without saying, I love you both."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I would like to go one step further and say that"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Yeah, it is."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Jake..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"You are now a Santiago."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"To Jake and Amy."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Oh, no. There are downsides to alcohol."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- No, you gave him the watch. That was your gift."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- It's a great idea, Mom."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- All right, it's dinner time. Everybody go wash your hands."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- [sighs] Yeah, but, you know,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"don't just blame my dad."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- I know. It's okay when I say it."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Yes, but no, what I was referring to was the fact that"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"They're only touched by freshly cleaned hands."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"from the unhygienic tree."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Did you just call my mom a tree?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I checked into your alibis."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Diaz, if you were changing the oil in your bike"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- You dipsticked my bike? - That's not all I dipsticked."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Mr. Fit, or should I call you by your real name?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"a beverage that pairs perfectly with pie."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Lady Dipstick, Mr. Fib, and the Milk Man."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"We're seeing the new "Minions" musical on Broadway."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I was picking up these matching T-shirts for my whole family."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I was embarrassed about how pumped I am to see them."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"The T-shirts were my idea."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"a Perry the Parrot for Ava."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I just didn't want you guys to know"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Makes me sick. Spend your life on the force,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and sitting right here in front of me."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I'd hate to be a passenger on one of your flights"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Riddle me this, Victor. Who sucks at carving turkey,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"thinks their rum is good when it's bad?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"You. Up top, Jake."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- [speaking Spanish] - What does that mean?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"As a matter of fact, I did. Sounds like someone's jealous."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I bet you never even had sex. - Oh, I've had sex."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- The best. - What is happening right now?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Well, we're not idiots. In fact--"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I just cut my thumb off. - What?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"[all scream]"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"We need help right now. - Do you have the thumb?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It's in a plastic baggy."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- One in Atlanta, one in Newark,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"- Okay, we have to get him help right now."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"He taught Sully Sullenberger how to fly."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and everybody in this hospital. - [groans]"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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