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Clips from The Muppet Show (1976) - Steve Martin (S02E02)

"Hey, when you say you are auditioning acts,"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"you mean new acts, don't you?"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Well, I don't really know, Fozzie."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Why didn't he tell me he wanted me to bleed?"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"OK, Scooter, what's the first act?"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Oh, we got some really great talent lined up, boss."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"First up is the Lautrec Sisters in the Garbage Cancan."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"[squeaking]"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Wee!"
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"- [rats chattering] - [applause]"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"He liked the dancing rats?"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Oh, what chance does a bear have?"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"wait till you see the next one."
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"[♪ Way Down Upon the Swanee River]"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Ribbit."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Don't ask me why the frog canceled."
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"[mock Swedish]"
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"...chop-chop-chop..."
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"[chuckling] Yeah, right on. Now you're talking my language."
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"Hey, can we have some quiet out there in the theater?"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Here he is, Steve Martin!"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"[cheering, applause]"
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"Steve, Steve, you really don't have to perform here, you know."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Well, I figured since I was here"
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"because we cancelled the show."
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"Oh, well, uh, maybe I could just perform for the guys."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"OK, well, listen, if you want him you got him."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Take it away, Steve."
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"- [cheering] - Thank you very much. Thank you."
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"are sitting out there saying to yourselves,"
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""Sure, he's great,"
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"but can he make balloon animals?""
The Muppet Show (1976)
"[cheering]"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"- Have you seen this before? - [all] Yeah! Yeah!"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Oh, I'm sorry. I don't like to repeat."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"[groaning]"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"- [male 2] Come on. - [male 3] Do it!"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"[male 4] Come on, Steve, come on!"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"I don't know what to do now."
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"and yet, the audience is demanding that I do it."
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"- [shouting continues] - I'll make a compromise."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"I'll make balloon animals but I won't blow them up."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"[cheering]"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"[all chattering]"
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"- Look at that. - Giraffe."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"- Well, here we go. - Dude got a sense of humor."
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"[speaking indistinctly]"
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"I fill up the balloons with words"
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"and if they pop they go, "Gosh darn it.""
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"[sputtering]"
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"It's not easy to get that air"
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"And now, fun balloon animals. Here we go."
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"[balloons squeaking]"
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"- Scooter, more balloons, Scooter. - Yes, sir. Yes, sir."
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"Oh."
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"- Oh, really... wow. - Puppy dog."
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"Thank you very much. OK, um..."
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"Well, just..."
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"Hey, I'm complete."
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"- [laughing] - You know, folks,"
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"a lot of people come to me and they say, "Steve,"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"how can you afford all those balloons"
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"Well, actually, I get the balloons for free."
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"I go down to the balloon ranch,"
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"where the little baby balloons are grown,"
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"And it's easy to trick them."
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"I'll go, "Look at that inner tube.""
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"And they go, "Where? Gosh.""
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"And I load up my pockets."
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"Absolutely no danger to me"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"because the adult balloons are very dumb."
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"- [distorted growling] - They wouldn't..."
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"[growling continues]"
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"- Ahhh! - [growling]"
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"It's out of control!"
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"Well, it is a different sort of an act."
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"I didn't even use a net."
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"You were terrific. You should make that into a feature film."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Can we get on with the auditions?"
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"Oh, next up is Terry Louise and Friend."
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"Ribbit."
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"- [screams] - Yeah."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Next we have one of the world's greatest comics,"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Hey, hey, hey, it's comedy time!"
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"You know what they call a dirty dog?"
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"A mud poodle!"
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"Ha! I am so funny!"
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"Next."
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"Hey, come on, Fozzie. You're taking all this too personally."
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"It's healthy to see what other people in your field are doing."
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"- It's an enriching experience. - Yeah."
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"- Hey, Scooter, what's next? - A guy named Lenny the Lizard."
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"He's an emcee."
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"What the hay?"
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"Thank you, thank you, thank you."
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"And welcome again to another edition of The Muppet Show."
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"Well, we've got a great show for you tonight,"
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"starring the incredible and amazingly talented me."
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"- Plus other good things... - [Kermit] Next!"
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"It was really interesting to see how another emcee works."
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"Cool it."
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"Yeah, you really must feel enriched, Kermit."
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"- Will you get out of here, Fozzie? - [laughing]"
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"- On to the next act, chief? - Yes, I'd love to."
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"I should think so."
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"Anyway, it's a weird little act"
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"direct from the planet Koozebane."
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"Here they are, the Four Fazoobs."
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"[percussion, honking]"
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"[squawking]"
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"[trumpeting]"
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"[grunting]"
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"Oosh! Things are looking a little weird."
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"OK, let's take a break, everybody."
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"Let's see what we have so far."
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"We had Mary Louise and Terry Louise."
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"We had the Fazoobs."
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"- The Fazoobs. - Kermit!"
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"What is it, Gonzo?"
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"Not now, Gonzo. Right now I'm in the middle of auditions."
The Muppet Show (1976)
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