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Clips from Disenchantment (2018) - Love's Tender Rampage (S01E01)

"Ow!"
Disenchantment (2018)
"Oh, no, no, no. This is bad."
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"Elfo, don't freak out. Just stay calm."
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"Yeah, like this guy."
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"- [screams] Are we in the plague pit? - [man] You are!"
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"[Bean and Elfo screaming]"
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"I haven't lived long enough to give up on my dreams yet."
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"I never got to see the world."
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"We only just met."
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"There are so many things we could have done and then tried."
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"Why didn't we give in to our instincts?"
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"It's too bad we never experienced bliss together."
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"Oh, Elfo..."
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"Oh, Bean."
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"You meant bliss the feeling."
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"Yeah, it's a drug. It makes you hallucinate."
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"You can do it in the Black Light District. I always wanted to try it."
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"- Are you coming, Roger? - [Roger] No, thanks!"
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"Elfo, it's okay, really."
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"Kiss you? You think I was trying to kiss you?"
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"Uh, um, okay. [chuckles] Yeah..."
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"You weren't trying to kiss me?"
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"Uh, definitely not."
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"and I'm not just making it up on the spot."
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"Welcome, my friends. One adult, two children."
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"Just breathe in and try to mellow."
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"I don't feel it yet. How much longer?"
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"Let's just all take another deep breath."
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"Good idea."
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"And on the exhale, Elfo will tell us more about his girlfriend."
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"- Dude. - Yeah, who is this mystery girl?"
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"It sorta seems like you might be a liar."
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"So, why haven't we met your little bitty elf squeeze?"
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"Okay, okay. So, what does this big love of yours look like?"
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"She's got white hair, buck teeth and two blue eyes."
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"Wrong. She has red hair, normal teeth, no offense, and one green eye."
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"Wait, did you say one eye?"
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"Yeah, that's right. Yup, now I'm remember... Just the one. Yup."
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"Well, now I'm really curious to meet her."
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"You can't! 'Cause, uh..."
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"Damn it!"
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"Yes, really far away."
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"Like, way up the country, past the Unpassable Mountains?"
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"Then how did you two meet?"
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"Um, on vacation. Yup. With our families."
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"so you can't look 'em up or anything. Just, you know, natural causes."
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"So, super-hot one-eyed girl with a dead family. Sounds legit."
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"Because she is legit and totally real and very special to me!"
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"Okay, okay, Elfo, we get it."
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"Now calm down. I'm starting to hallucinate."
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"Whoa. It's like I'm looking at you,"
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"Your nose is so beautiful. Everything's so unreal."
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"- Just like Elfo's girlfriend. [echoes] - [grunts]"
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"Mmm, mmm."
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"[Elfo sighs]"
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"[chuckles and sighs]"
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"- [grunting] - [heart beating]"
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"[both grunt]"
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"What happened to you guys?"
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"Elfo, I owe you an apology, man. I totally saw your girlfriend back there."
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"[Pendergast grunts]"
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"I think we're fully prepared to slay a dragon."
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"[Luci] Can't believe Elfo stuck to his story"
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"no matter how hard I laughed."
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"Did you ever stop to think that's because it's true?"
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"Nah, I was busy with laughter."
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"That girl is real, and he's in love with her."
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"- We gotta do something special for him. - [Luci] Let him sit on your lap at dinner."
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"[Bean] No, he gets crumbs everywhere."
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"I meant we should go find his girlfriend."
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"You were saying?"
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"You're gonna send these knights to die on a quest"
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"for a made-up girlfriend? Cool."
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"I crawled through a door and saw a rainbow,"
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"Is this quest optional?"
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"Silence, Turbish. We'll have her to you in a fortnight."
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"Don't know how long that is, but you have three days."
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"Elfo will need someone to dance with,"
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"And if we succeed, how shall I be rewarded?"
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"[Zog] With the goddamn salary I pay you."
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"[knight] You got it!"
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"Hmm, I'll hit mute."
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"Personally, I prefer to watch the news."
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"Is your dinner poisoned? The answer may surprise you."
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"But, first, we go live to the courtyard for the return of the knights."
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"Come along."
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"[Bean] Elfo, have I got a surprise for you."
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"I knew that you were longing for something,"
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"so I had the knights get it."
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"[woman grunts]"
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"No, stupid, it's your girlfriend!"
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"Elfo, you mofo."
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"Hey! [chuckles]"
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"How was your trip, sweetie?"
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"[Zog] Whoa, whoa, whoa. Oh, no, you don't."
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"Send her back up whatever beanstalk she rode in on."
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"Come on, Dad. You can't stand in the way of true love."
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"He's an elf. She's a giant."
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"[grunts] I never wanna think that thought again."
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"Put her somewhere where I can't see her. What's under the dungeon?"
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"The cheese cave, sire."
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"All right. Stick her down there, and bring me a nice hunk of Gorgonzola."
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"Why am I the only one defending your girlfriend?"
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"Uh, a supportive one. She can fight her own battles."
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"She's 12 feet tall."
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"[growling]"
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"Anything but the Pepper Jack."
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"Pendergast is gonna take her chains off so you can get on in there,"
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"if you know what I'm sayin'."
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"I'm talking about the cave. Just go."
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"[whimpers]"
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"[giant growling]"
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"we're both imprisoned."
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"You, like a wild animal."
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"Me, in a complex web of lies."
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"[oinking]"
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"[screams]"
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"Oh, sorry. Didn't see you down there. What's shakin', bacon?"
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"Not my loins, I'm afraid."
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"Ugh. Why has no one eaten him yet?"
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