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Clips from How I Met Your Mother (2005) - Romance (S04E04)

"MARSHALL: I was at the company gym this morning playing basketball."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Now, the guys I work with can be pretty brutal with their ridicule."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Hey, look at Wisniewski. He's gonna cry. Look at him."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I don't know. I don't think knees are supposed to bend that way."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I think he might have torn his ACL."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Yeah, or his Fallopian tubes. Boom!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(BOTH LAUGHING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Anyways, I go to my duffle bag to get out my work clothes..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Wait, wait, wait, wait. I want to say it. I want to say it. I want to say it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Fine. You say it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Marshall goes to his duffle bag to get out his work clothes and..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No, no, no, you say it. It's funnier if you say it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No, let me say it. No, no, you say it. You say it. Say it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No, no, no, you go. You go."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- I forgot... - Marshall forgot his pants!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"He forgot his pants."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Okay, Marshall forgot his pants. That's pretty funny."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"It's no chimpanzee wearing two tuxedos."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(LAUGHING) I mean, what did he... He forgot he put the first one on?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Stupid monkey."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So Karen in New York. Weird, right?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Ted, you cannot get back together with Karen."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I never said I was going to get back together with her."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"But I was thinking, she's new in town."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Would it be the worst thing in the world if I gave her a call?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No, no, Ted, it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"It would be the fourth worst thing."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Number one, super volcano. Number two, an asteroid hits the Earth."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Number three, all footage of Evel Knievel is lost. Number four, Ted calls Karen."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Number five, Lily gets eaten by a shark."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm Lily and I approve the order of that list."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You don't know the whole story."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Ted and Karen were off-and-on all through college, and it always went the same way."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"They'd be having fun, douching it up, and then one day..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(SNIFFS)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Sorry, bro."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Okay."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and then we would tell him how we really felt."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Karen and I broke up."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- We hated her! - Bitch had to go!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And then Ted would build up a head of steam"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and finally take the bus to Providence to give Karen a piece of his mind."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Karen! - Karen!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And then, sure enough, the whole thing would start all over again."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Sorry, bro."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So she would come visit you at school and the second you turned your back,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"she would bring guys back to your dorm room?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Respect."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Okay, I was an idiot."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"She was my first real girlfriend. I was madly in love with her."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We all did stuff we regret in college."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Junior year, Marshall grew a soul patch, wore a Rasta hat,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and asked everyone to call him M.J. Smooth."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I don't regret that for one second."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So you guys absolutely don't think I should call her?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- ROBIN: Ted, no! - Of course not!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Get it through your thick skull!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Okay, okay, fine, I won't."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Interesting piece of trivia, I called her."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Finish the pants story."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I can't believe you called her."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Why don't you just ask her to lunch while you're at it?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Because, Lily, I'm not going to ask her out to lunch, again."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Wow. - You asked her to lunch?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Why would anyone want to have lunch with their ex?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Glad you asked, Marshall."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"There are four possible motives behind an ex lunch."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Number one, they want to get back together."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh. Like my high school boyfriend, Scooter."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Lilies, clever. I'm sorry I don't have a scooter for you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Where is that waiter? - Why? You like waiters?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm going to be the greatest waiter on this Earth, and then you'll love me."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Number two, they want to kill you. Like when I had lunch with Wendy."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm glad we could finally do this."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I almost gave up on you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"But you didn't. You just kept on trying."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"By the way, there's something I've been meaning to give you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Gun! She's got a gun!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(STAMMERING) It's a tie."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Number three, they actually do want to give you your stuff back."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Like when I had lunch with Curt."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"By the way, there's something I've been meaning to give you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"My snub-nose.38 Police Special! God, I knew I left that somewhere."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Every time I watch the news, I'm like, "Oops. Hope that wasn't my gun.""
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(CHUCKLES)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Breaking up was the right choice."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Like my lunch with Nicole Barsamian."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Who's Nicole Barsamian? - My ex."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- I'm seeing someone. - Already? Who?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Lee Roberts. He reads at a fifth-grade level."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You have to cancel the lunch."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I would definitely do that, definitely, except I already had it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Robin, I'm going to need to borrow the butt of your gun."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"How could you break bread with that woman?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"It was just lunch, and you know she doesn't eat wheat."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We had a great time catching up."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I mean, we even laughed about what jerks we were back then."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I can't believe I had a beret for each day of the week."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I can't believe I had an iron-on image of Molière on my backpack."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Man, we were pretentious."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So pretentious."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Hi."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I don't want to cause a scene, but your wine list has a Châteauneuf-du-Pape"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You might want to alert your sommelier."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And for you?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(SPEAKING ITALIAN)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I mean, there was one weird moment towards the end."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"A kiss on the cheek is too familiar. A handshake is too formal."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And a hug is just like a public dry hump."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I think you're hugging wrong."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- So what happened? - Well..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Schopenhauer made a saucy little argument in which he posited..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Ted, honey, I want you to go outside and bite the curb. I'll be out in a minute."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And after the year I've had, I... I don't know,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I guess having lunch with her just reminded me of what it was like to be 18"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and have my whole life figured out."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And I would like to remind everyone that at least I was wearing pants, Marshall."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh. Yeah, the pants story."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Pants story, bomaye! Pants story, bomaye!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I had a little situation, so I called Lily."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
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