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Clips from The Muppet Show (1976) - Ruth Buzzi (S01E01)

"Don't you feel stupid with three feet?"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Sure, but the other one didn't come back from the cleaners."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"You know, I have a bone to pick with you."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Aah!"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Three feet and one broken back."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Well, I think I'll go stretch my legs."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"I'll do it for you."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Aah! Aah! Aah!"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Well, time soon for the handsome frog here"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"to make another one of his introductions."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"I will check myself and see how I look in the mirror."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Scooter, where did you get this ridiculous windup TV show host?"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"With a few exceptions,"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"the characters on this program are weird and peculiar,"
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"and not to be trusted."
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"is the wonderful singing team of Wayne and Wanda."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"so they're sure to get it right."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Here they are -"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Wayne and Wanda, with "Row, Row, Row.""
The Muppet Show (1976)
"(♪ "Row, Row, Row" by W Jerome and J Monaco)"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Young Johnnie Jones, he had a cute little boat"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ And all the girlies I would take for a float"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ He had girlies on the shore"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Sweet little peaches by the score"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ But Johnnie was a wisenheimer, you know"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ A steady girl was Flo"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ And every Sunday afternoon"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ She'd jump in his boat and they would spoon"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ And then he'd row, row, row ♪"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Here's a Muppet news flash."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"The Atlantic Ocean has just been kidnapped."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Disappearance of the ocean was first reported"
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"by lighthouse keeper Morrie Patterson."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"He was awakened late last night"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"when 500 fish pounded on his door asking for water."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Authorities suspect that the ocean is being held prisoner"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"in an apartment somewhere in Newark."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"A ransom note has reportedly been received."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"The kidnappers are demanding two Christmases each year"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"and a hug from Mommy every night."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Ladies and gentlemen,"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"a lady you loved on Laugh-In and hundreds of other shows,"
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"a comedienne, an actress, a singer, a dancer"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"and a lot of fun at parties -"
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"our guest star, Miss Ruth Buzzi."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"(♪ fanfare)"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"(♪ "Can't Take My Eyes Off You" by B Crewe and B Gaudio)"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ You're just too good to be true"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Can't take my eyes off of you"
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"♪ You'd be like heaven to touch"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ I wanna hold you so much"
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"♪ Then I thank God I'm alive"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ You're just too good to be true"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Pardon the way that I stare"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ There's nothing else to compare"
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"♪ There are no words left to speak"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ But if you feel like I feel"
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"♪ Please let me know that it's real"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ You're just too good to be true"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Can't take my eyes off of you"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ I love you, baby"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ And if it's quite all right"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Don't bring me down, I pray"
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"♪ Oh, pretty baby"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Now that I've found you, stay"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ And let me love you, baby"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Let me love you"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Let me love you, baby"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Let me love you"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Let me love you ♪"
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"That's my kind of woman."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"(♪ "Onions Make Me Cry")"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"You may not know this,"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"but I'm really a very sentimental dog."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"I cry easily."
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"Onions, for instance, always make me cry."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ I'll admit I split bananas"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Take Easter eggs and make them dye"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ But I never harmed an onion"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ So why should they make me cry?"
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"♪ Once I saw a salad dressing"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ My face got radish - my, oh, my"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ But I never harmed an onion"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ So why should they make me cry?"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Potatoes I've mashed and berries I've crushed"
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"♪ I've made an artichoke and that's not all"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ I've also whipped cream and beaten an egg"
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"♪ Yes, I've even made a melon ball"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Of all the things above I'm guilty"
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"♪ If punished, I would know just why"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ But I never harmed an onion"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ So why should they make me cry?"
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"♪ Oh, why should they make me cry? ♪"
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"(sobbing)"
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"and chew the fat for a while."
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"Oh, Kermit, I never chew the fat."
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"Fat is a no-no."
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"In fact, every time I see fat, I go, "Bleah!""
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"Yeah, well, I... You are looking at a body, Kermit,"
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"that has not one ounce of fat on it."
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"Well, yeah... This is lean. Lean."
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"El leano, Kermit, my froggy friend."
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"Yeah, yeah. I can see all that. Yeah..."
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"Kermit, I had a friend once who chewed so much fat"
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"that she was as big as a house"
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"and she decided to rent herself out as a duplex."
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"You get it, Kermit? A duplex. Yeah. Yeah."
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"I seem to be losing control here."
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"Ruth, Ruth, what I meant, when I said all that back there,"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"what I meant was let's talk a bit."
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"Let's just talk a bit."
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"I love to talk, Kermit. OK, what'll we talk about?"
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"Well, we all know that you hate fat, but what do you love?"
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"Oh, well, I love to eat."
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"But you just said... I eat health foods,"
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"organic foods, dairy products..."
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"Dairy products killed my uncle."
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"Oh, that's awful."
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"Yep, he was hit by a dairy truck."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"That's terrible."
The Muppet Show (1976)
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