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Clips from How I Met Your Mother (2005) - Romance (S04E04)

"(ROBIN VOMITING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Hey, everybody."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We got a high-pressure system coming in from the west and..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(LAUGHING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"On the plus side, I bought the cutest purse today."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- (SIGHING) You don't want to know. - Come on. Tell me."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm pregnant."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I will raise this child with you. You are not alone in this."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We can even get married if you want, but I'd still want to see other girls,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"so it'd have to be one of those kinds of marriages."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"God, stop it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm not pregnant. It's food poisoning. God!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I ate something from this place,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and three hours later, I was spewing like an open hydrant."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- God. From where? - Well, that's a gross question."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- I don't want to tell you. - What?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Ted, Ted! Go to YouTube. Put in "Robin Scherbatsky, morning show, vomit.""
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh, hey, Robin. Home so soon?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Someone already put it on YouTube? - Yeah. Someone."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So, why you been throwing up? You pregnant?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Yeah, Barney. I'm pregnant."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So, wait, why won't you tell me where you got food poisoning?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You love this place. If I tell you, it'll just ruin it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Okay. That makes sense. - Yeah."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Is it that Indian place where the cat jumps on all the tables?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- I'm not saying. - That Spanish place with the baby's crib"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- in the middle of the restaurant? - I'm not saying."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"God, no. No, no, no."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Fine, you really want to know? - Yes!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- It's Schlegel's Bagels. - No!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Schlegel's? Thanks a lot, Robin."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Now I'm gonna have to try to find another place in New York"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"that serves bagels."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I would have taken a right."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"OLDER TED: I would have gotten a bagel,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"gone home, worked on the old hat building,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and you kids might never have been born."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"But I turned left instead, to go to my second-favorite bagel place,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Why did I stop there? Here's why."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Yes!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Bro's Life magazine."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Page 83. Check it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
""What your paintball gun says about your personality.""
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Below that."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
""That last five pounds. How to get her to lose them.""
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
""Petra Petrova.""
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Petra Petrova."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Bro's Life magazine's Girl of the Year for May."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"A delicate flower in stiletto pumps and leopard panties, straddling an ATV."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(SNORTING) These magazines are so lame."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I mean, she's probably airbrushed and enhanced."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- I have a date with her. - You are my hero! Are you serious?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- How do you have a date with her? - Not part of the story."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Ted, I have been waiting a long time to say this."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Of course, she's the one. You have to marry those."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Her."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Marry?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(LAUGHING MOCKINGLY)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No. I have something much, much more special in mind."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Petra here, if all goes well,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"will be my... Wait for it... 200th."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Your 200th, as in "sex with"?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Not if I was wearing a HazMat suit."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh. Right, 'cause there can be too many of something wonderful."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
""Hey, Babe Ruth, easy, big fella. Let's not hit too many homers.""
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
""Hey, Steve Guttenberg, maybe just make three Police Academy movies."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
""America's laughed enough.""
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Who are these girls?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"That was rhetorical. Don't show me the list."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Anyway, the big night is Thursday."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm having a celebratory soirée beforehand at MacLaren's."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Prepare a toast. Black tie optional, but preferred."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Gifts are, look, I would say unnecessary, but follow your heart."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Barney, 200's too many."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- It's not too many. - Thank you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No, don't get me wrong."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You're disgusting, and the cops should probably clamp a boot on your genitals,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"but that number should be higher."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"After Barney told me about all this, I crunched the numbers and, well,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I had some charts made up."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Whoa! It's way more than 20. And B. Smooth don't do nothing roughly."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Let's say 20. So, 20 girls a week means 1,040 girls a year."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"In Barney's 16 years of sexual activity,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"that means he's hit on 16,640 girls."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Now, if he's bedded 199 of them,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"that's a success rate of"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"a little over one percent."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"That's a batting average of 12,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"eight times worse than the career batting average"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(TED AND ROBIN LAUGHING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Suspiciously quiet during this conversation"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"about number of sex partners."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"It's the grand total. That's the only number that matters."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Says who? - Matthew Panning,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Stinson, you're such a dweeb-o. I bet you never even done it with a girl."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Neither have you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"How many times do I have to explain this?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"They're seventh graders at my cousin's school on Long Island."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Well, you know what, Matthew? Someday, I'm gonna do it with 200."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(ALL LAUGHING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And call him I will."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Call him"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I will."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Hey, you listed Gaby Allan twice, as 78 and 162."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"What? Let me see."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Seven... One... Oh, my God."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Wait I... I counted the same girl twice? That means I'm only at 198?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Well, that only means that you're half a percent less gross than we thought."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm seducing a Czech supermodel in two hours."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I can't squander that on 199."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Well, what are you gonna do?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I mean, it's not like you're gonna find someone new"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"to have sex with in the next two hours."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Wanna come back to my place and see some moon shells?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Go away."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I just got back from my wife's grave. Put her in the ground a year ago today."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Man, I miss her. I sure could use some comfort."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You're creepy."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and have a gaggle of rug rats, like, right now."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
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