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Clips from Shameless - It's Time to Kill the Turtle (S01E01)

"I need some milk."
Shameless
"I need some breakfast."
Shameless
"Which do you like better?"
Shameless
"Mmm."
Shameless
"Or two?"
Shameless
"Mmm. One."
Shameless
"What about one?"
Shameless
"Mm-hmm."
Shameless
"Mm, definitely two."
Shameless
"Okay, one?"
Shameless
"Oh, God, one. One."
Shameless
"One, one. I'm not finished yet."
Shameless
"One?"
Shameless
"Mmm. Mmm."
Shameless
"Yeah, that's what I'm asking you. How do you know about Candace?"
Shameless
"Oh, so there's something to know?"
Shameless
"We... She... We work together."
Shameless
""Hey, sweetie, it's important. Call me.""
Shameless
"Uh, she's a little high maintenance."
Shameless
"That happens when you fuck someone."
Shameless
"Believe me, I didn't fuck Candace."
Shameless
"We work together."
Shameless
"I'll turn it off."
Shameless
"Shit."
Shameless
"What? I got to leave."
Shameless
"Are you kidding me?"
Shameless
"Um, I'll make it up to you."
Shameless
"I'll make it up to you tonight."
Shameless
"I don't think he's gonna wake up."
Shameless
"Mr. Gallagher?"
Shameless
"What the bejeezus?!"
Shameless
"Sorry. We tried smelling salts,"
Shameless
"caffeine injections, ice baths."
Shameless
"Where am I?"
Shameless
"In the hospital."
Shameless
"You've been unconscious for two days"
Shameless
"with alcohol poisoning."
Shameless
"Oh, that's-that's nothing."
Shameless
"Back in '95, I was out for eight days."
Shameless
"Wait, wait. Hold on on second."
Shameless
"I'm Dr. Seery. These are my residents."
Shameless
"We have a proposition for you."
Shameless
"Well, you're hot, but it's been a while since I've been"
Shameless
"Oh, you've-you've misunderstood."
Shameless
"Uh, we'd like you to participate in our medical study."
Shameless
"Your what?"
Shameless
"In my whole career, I've never seen"
Shameless
"such a spectacular display of alcoholism."
Shameless
"Thank you."
Shameless
"No."
Shameless
"We could offer you $3,000."
Shameless
"- Yes. - I was like, "Girl,"
Shameless
"you are not using my eyeliner if you have pinkeye.""
Shameless
"And she was, like, "Well, then, you're not my friend anymore.""
Shameless
"Hmm?"
Shameless
"You're not listening, are you?"
Shameless
"No. Sorry."
Shameless
"What's wrong with you?"
Shameless
"I slept with someone, not Kash."
Shameless
"What?! Yeah."
Shameless
"Well, deets, please. Who?"
Shameless
"I can't tell you."
Shameless
"He's on the down low, you know?"
Shameless
"Wow."
Shameless
"Yeah."
Shameless
"Hiding our silver, in case they send us a thief."
Shameless
"We have three settings, none of 'em even match."
Shameless
"Found my old football one of my foster dads left me."
Shameless
"Then she's gonna learn some kick ass moves."
Shameless
"Kev Ball fakes left, spins right. He's at the 30."
Shameless
"The 20. The ten. Touchdown!"
Shameless
"Hello. I'm sorry."
Shameless
"I'm Mrs. Martini from the DCFS."
Shameless
"Oh."
Shameless
"I'm Veronica. This is my husband Kevin."
Shameless
"Hey. Hi. Nice to meet you."
Shameless
"Uh, this is Ethel."
Shameless
"Wow. Okay. Hi."
Shameless
"Ethel and 70 other children were"
Shameless
"removed from"
Shameless
"a religious sect."
Shameless
"Religious sect?"
Shameless
"You mean, like a cult?"
Shameless
"Hello."
Shameless
"You'll come back every three days for a drug screening"
Shameless
"and brain scan."
Shameless
"In addition, you'll be wearing my RAM."
Shameless
"This fine piece of jewelry will alert us to any alcohol use."
Shameless
"Make it the whole two weeks, you get the cash."
Shameless
"Can I get an advance?"
Shameless
"Drink one sip of booze, light turns red."
Shameless
"Attempt to take the bracelet off, light turns red."
Shameless
"Spill rubbing alcohol on it, light turns red."
Shameless
"Red light equals no cash."
Shameless
"Get ready to say good-bye to three grand."
Shameless
"I'm a sober man!"
Shameless
"Usual, Frank?"
Shameless
"Didn't you hear me, Jess?"
Shameless
"I'm sober now."
Shameless
"Here you go."
Shameless
"JB and an Old Style. Whoa. Whoa."
Shameless
"Well, granted, I've been unconscious"
Shameless
"for most of it, but I figure,"
Shameless
"if I can abstain from alcohol when I'm out,"
Shameless
"What are you talking about?"
Shameless
"Medical study."
Shameless
"For the next two weeks, my body is a temple."
Shameless
"No alcohol for this fella."
Shameless
"And I got this little guy to keep my honest."
Shameless
"Hey, Lindsay Lohan, how much are they paying you?"
Shameless
"Well, who says I'm getting paid?"
Shameless
"No, seriously, how much?"
Shameless
"Never you mind what I'm making."
Shameless
"You should spend some time taking a personal inventory"
Shameless
"of what you're doing for the betterment of society."
Shameless
"Why are you in a bar,"
Shameless
"Frank, if you're not drinking?"
Shameless
"Came in for some support."
Shameless
"The way I see it, I've done a lot"
Shameless
"and I could use a little help from you all now."
Shameless
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