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Clips from Dead Like Me - A Cook (S01E01)

"Yes, sweetie, but throwing him in the toilet's a rather tough-love approach."
Dead Like Me
"Things she cared about suddenly began to disappear from her life."
Dead Like Me
"- How was everything? - Oh, it was just fine."
Dead Like Me
"I enjoyed your eggs very much. Thank you."
Dead Like Me
"- Hi. - What are you doing?"
Dead Like Me
"- Going into my apartment. - I mean, the dog."
Dead Like Me
"- The dog's going in too. - Georgia, this is a small space we share."
Dead Like Me
"Share? I can't believe she knew the word."
Dead Like Me
"- So? - Well..."
Dead Like Me
"I know this isn't something you care about, but I own some beautiful clothes."
Dead Like Me
"- What's your point? - He looks like a shedder."
Dead Like Me
"- That's something I can live with. - Truth is I'm wildly allergic to dogs."
Dead Like Me
"Oh, yes. I'll see you later."
Dead Like Me
"JD and I wandered through the park for the better part of an afternoon."
Dead Like Me
"But, in our hearts, both JD and I knew we were just killing time."
Dead Like Me
"Yeah."
Dead Like Me
"Millie? Millie."
Dead Like Me
"I'm working. Oh..."
Dead Like Me
"This is so not cool."
Dead Like Me
"Neither is catching Zs on the J-O-B."
Dead Like Me
"- Oh. - Is there something I need to know?"
Dead Like Me
"A tired worker is a poor worker. A poor worker is often an out-of-work worker."
Dead Like Me
"What's going on?"
Dead Like Me
"I have this dog. My roommate says she's allergic."
Dead Like Me
"Skeevy?"
Dead Like Me
"- What kind of doggie? - Golden retriever."
Dead Like Me
"Why don't you stay with me for a while while you figure things out?"
Dead Like Me
"Oh, that's very generous of you, Delores, but I'll be fine. I'll take care of things."
Dead Like Me
"I'm sure you will."
Dead Like Me
"You have a Post-it on your forehead."
Dead Like Me
"So he choked to death."
Dead Like Me
"I've never had a choker. I can't imagine it's very pretty."
Dead Like Me
"A shot through the heart. I was here. Didn't even see him go down."
Dead Like Me
"- Yup. Poor guy. - Choked on a ham sandwich."
Dead Like Me
"- Just like Mama Cass. - Just like Mama Cass."
Dead Like Me
"No. I got Roberto in there cooking."
Dead Like Me
"Casey, I know how to cook. I know how to cook very well."
Dead Like Me
"I'm a gifted man. Why are you looking for somebody?"
Dead Like Me
"Well, anybody's better than what I got. I can't speak Spanish."
Dead Like Me
"- Go. Vamoose. - Yes."
Dead Like Me
"It's all yours. I don't need this bullshit."
Dead Like Me
"And I'm a fucking citizen, dude. Speak English."
Dead Like Me
"Just call it coffee. Don't call it mud. It'll only confuse people."
Dead Like Me
"- You're not supposed to be here. - Neither are you."
Dead Like Me
"but I wasn't sure what that meant."
Dead Like Me
"Then the guy dog says to the girl dog,"
Dead Like Me
"Whoo!"
Dead Like Me
"That's right. My dog."
Dead Like Me
"I knew something had to be done. Something drastic."
Dead Like Me
"- Come on in. - Thanks for letting us stay here."
Dead Like Me
"Shame about the homeless. They are passionate lovers, but they rob you blind."
Dead Like Me
"It's nice. Clean."
Dead Like Me
"I like to look at every inch as an opportunity."
Dead Like Me
"Delores, where's your cat?"
Dead Like Me
"Murray? How sweet to remember."
Dead Like Me
"Murray's away. Dialysis, three days a week."
Dead Like Me
"This is my snooze bin."
Dead Like Me
"Hope you don't mind my night sweats."
Dead Like Me
"Over here is where I puzzle. I got a real head-scratcher here."
Dead Like Me
"Tonight we make a big push."
Dead Like Me
"And over here..."
Dead Like Me
"This is central ops."
Dead Like Me
"Well, you came to the wrong place, lazybones."
Dead Like Me
"You take a couple of seconds to get your bearings"
Dead Like Me
"and then you and I are gonna be busy little beavers."
Dead Like Me
"Damn it!"
Dead Like Me
"- Your PCs are bubbling. - What?"
Dead Like Me
"Flip 'em over before the bubbles burst or they lose their elasticity."
Dead Like Me
"If you don't know, we're knee-deep in water. Plate 'em."
Dead Like Me
"Butter! You're killing me. Butter is elemental."
Dead Like Me
"- I've been eating them for 20 years. - That's all you know how to do."
Dead Like Me
"If that's your attitude... Check, please!"
Dead Like Me
"Please, no finger painting."
Dead Like Me
"I'm giving you wisdom, an ancient Chinese secret,"
Dead Like Me
"Eggs!"
Dead Like Me
"- Run zippo. - What?"
Dead Like Me
"It's called the line because it's like being on the front."
Dead Like Me
"Every soft egg that turns hard is like a soldier that died in your arms."
Dead Like Me
"Rest in peace."
Dead Like Me
"I like leaving folded laundry out for a moment before I drawer it."
Dead Like Me
"Let it breathe. Hey, don't quit on me now."
Dead Like Me
"The night is young and there's much to be done."
Dead Like Me
"What do you like?"
Dead Like Me
"- No. I thought you did. - Oh, silly us."
Dead Like Me
"We'll have to locate those dishes and wash them again."
Dead Like Me
"- The computer told you that? - No. Stinky 5,000 told me that."
Dead Like Me
"Looks like he's also voting for Ferns & Flowers."
Dead Like Me
"I have my own website."
Dead Like Me
""Getting things done with Delores"."
Dead Like Me
".. and there... and there... and there."
Dead Like Me
"But not in the bathroom. Folks looking at me on the potty would be wrong."
Dead Like Me
"While watching her everywhere else is just plain insane."
Dead Like Me
"I was thinking about calling it Herbig Website,"
Dead Like Me
"but I was worried I'd attract people with a fetish for, you know... big things."
Dead Like Me
"So people actually pay to watch you?"
Dead Like Me
"but that all goes straight to the American Amputee Association."
Dead Like Me
"My good friend, Rebecca Randall, climbed Everest."
Dead Like Me
"She made the summit, but lost all ten little Indians."
Dead Like Me
"Oh!"
Dead Like Me
"Hungry Girl wants to know the dog's name."
Dead Like Me
"- Um, JD. - And what does the JD stand for?"
Dead Like Me
"I don't know."
Dead Like Me
"Oh."
Dead Like Me
"What a pain in the ass. What do you think happened?"
Dead Like Me
"Umpire says, "It ain't nothing till I call it.""
Dead Like Me
"This fucking guy has been called out on strikes."
Dead Like Me
"The thought that people were watching me kept me awake."
Dead Like Me
"I couldn't help wondering who liked to watch Delores "getting things done"."
Dead Like Me
"It's my life, my apartment, my dog!"
Dead Like Me
"You're the guest and if you don't like it, you can kiss my dead ass goodbye."
Dead Like Me
"And you. A dog in a hot tub?"
Dead Like Me
"That's just sick."
Dead Like Me
"- Not bad? - Come on. That is spot-on. It's Michelangelo."
Dead Like Me
"- Fine. - No, no. That's how it starts."
Dead Like Me
"- You're being melodramatic. - I'm not!"
Dead Like Me
"- The cheese is melted on the patty. - I like the cheese on the bread."
Dead Like Me
"What do you mean?"
Dead Like Me
"A dish is a collection of flavours, consistencies."
Dead Like Me
"Start swapping ingredients and it's like fucking with a Jenga tower of tastes."
Dead Like Me
""Der Patty Melt" should have kraut on it."
Dead Like Me
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