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Clips from South Park - Cartman's Silly Hate Crime 2000 (S04E04)

"Come on, let's give it a try!"
South Park
"Sweet!"
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"Look out! Look out!"
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"Dude! Bail! Bail!"
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"- We killed Kenny? - We killed Kenny. We're bastards."
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"Well, that didn't work. What else can we try?"
South Park
"Nothing else is going to work."
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"We have to face the fact that without Cartman"
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"Well, I sure do hate to see my gender lose to a bunch of women."
South Park
"This is a sad day for men everywhere."
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"You know something, guys?"
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"Good luck on Saturday, doughnut punchers!"
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"That does it! We've got no other choice."
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"- Huh? - How?"
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"I saw a movie once where they baked a cake and put a nail file inside of it."
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"And have you been brushing your teeth?"
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"Yes, Mommy."
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"- And not dropping your soap? - Yes, Mommy."
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"- Hi, Mom. - Young man, that is the fourth time"
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"you've been late for our visiting time! You are grounded!"
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"Grounded? Oh, no!"
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"So, we made you this cake."
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"There's a ail-nay ile-fay inside of it."
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"- What's that? - Listen aggot-fay!"
South Park
"An ail-nay ile-fay so you can reak-bay out of ison-pray!"
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"Yeah, you stupid umbass-day."
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"They on't-day? Why the ell-hay ot-nay?"
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"It ook-tay our-fay ours-hay to ake-bay this od damn-gay ake-kay,"
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"and ow-nay we're otally-tay ewed-scray!"
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"Each year over a million people die of..."
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"Just hand over the goddamn cigarettes!"
South Park
"Look, if you guys want me back to win the sledding race,"
South Park
"then I need those cigarettes."
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"That's what everybody does."
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"- Shut up, you guys, it's not funny! - All right, here!"
South Park
"Wow. I really wish I hadn't sat here and watched that."
South Park
"- Me, too. - Okay, guys,"
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"Don't fart on your way out. You might make little smoke signals."
South Park
"Very funny, you guys."
South Park
"That sucks we couldn't give him the nail file!"
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"We have to go see Token"
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"- Well? Did you get the cigarettes? - Yes."
South Park
"They are safely concealed in the depths of my ass."
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"All right, go sit on the toilet and poop them out."
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"There's one."
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"Come on!"
South Park
"Oh, God damn it!"
South Park
"You flushed them?"
South Park
"Well, you spend eight years taking a crap and then"
South Park
"flushing the toilet, it sort of becomes a reflex!"
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"Please, just help me bust out of here."
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"No way, douche, I told you, I ain't your friend."
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"Son of a bitch!"
South Park
"Dude, I didn't know Token lived so far away."
South Park
"to promote cultural diversity."
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"- Yeah, but isn't Token the only one? - Yeah."
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"- Hello? - Hi. Can Token come out and play?"
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"Well, his head's still a little sore, but you can come in if you like."
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"Killer."
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"- No. - Well, then you've got to call the jail"
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"right now and tell them that you forgive Cartman for being a dumbass."
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"- It's not? - No, you see,"
South Park
"the only person that can let Eric out of juvenile hall is the governor."
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"Damn it! Son of a bitch, damn it!"
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"Well, why don't you tell the governor yourself?"
South Park
"- Oh. - Sit down, boys."
South Park
"Cool! My very own Tic-Tac-Throw game!"
South Park
"It smells, man!"
South Park
"Now I got your stupid game, tell me how to break out of here!"
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"You're not gonna break out of here!"
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"You're here till you're 21, douche!"
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"- But you said... - I just wanted you to"
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"What, you actually think I give a crap about you?"
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"- I thought that... - Man,"
South Park
"you better wise up to the way things work in the big house!"
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"Hey, guys! I gots me a new Tic-Tac-Throw!"
South Park
"We can play it at recess!"
South Park
"I want my mom!"
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"Dude."
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"Mommy! I want my mommy!"
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"Look, if it's that important to you, I'll bust you out of here."
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"- You will? - Yeah. Yeah, I will."
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"Only because... Because I wanna bust out, too, and see Disneyland."
South Park
"Oh, not another committee. Send them in."
South Park
"This is the Free Eric Cartman Now Committee?"
South Park
"- Okay, go ahead and start. - I don't start, you start."
South Park
"presentation on hate-crime laws entitled..."
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"Yes, over the past few years,"
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"If somebody kills somebody, it's a crime."
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"because all crimes are hate crimes."
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"is that not a hate crime?"
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"If a person vandalises a government building,"
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"The motivation for a crime shouldn't affect the sentencing."
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"Mayor, it is time to stop splitting people into groups."
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"All hate-crime laws do is support the ideas"
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"that blacks are different from whites,"
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"that we aren't the same."
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"But instead, we should all be treated the same, with the same laws"
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"will have a chance to win the sledding race on Thursday."
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"That made the most sense of any presentation"
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"I've heard in the last three years."
South Park
"Hurry up! They're sending the dogs after us!"
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"- You go on ahead without me. - Okay!"
South Park
"Hey! You're supposed to say,"
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"Oh. Really?"
South Park
"Look, kid, you go on. You've got something to live for out there."
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"- Here, I want you to have these. - Okay."
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"- Oh. I can't take these. - Take them! They'll bring you luck."
South Park
"- Romper? - Yeah?"
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"well, you're a friend to me."
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"All right, freeze!"
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"You'll never take us alive!"
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"We're going down together, pigs!"
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"But you've been pardoned by the governor!"
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"Well, come on! Are we racing or not?"
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"He's gotta show up! He's just got to!"
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"Come on! My feet are getting cold, fudge packers!"
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"Dude, I guess we just gotta try it without him."
South Park
"- All right, where's Clyde? - Right here."
South Park
"For the last time, I'm not fat, so stop calling me fat, God damn it!"
South Park
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