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Clips from The Goldbergs (2013) - DannyDonnieJoeyJonJordan (S02E02)

"Adult adam: If being sentimental were a sport,"
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"My mom would've gone pro."
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"Each moment of our lives was documented, decorated,"
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"And preserved forever in one of her many creepy scrapbooks."
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"Aw. (chuckles)"
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"His little body's changing."
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"You said that was to show the dermatologist!"
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"Lies!"
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"My dad, on the other hand,"
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"Wasn't quite as sentimental about us."
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"Bye, dad."
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"Have fun at camp or college or"
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"Wherever it is you're going."
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"It drove him crazy"
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"That my mom would commandeer the garage"
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"To obsessively save every little piece of artwork,"
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"Doodle, and drawing that we have ever done."
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"(sighs heavily)"
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"It accrued slowly over time until that fateful day"
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"Of the great goldberg avalanche."
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"Aah!"
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"Are you kidding me?"
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"Oh! Damn it!"
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"Help!"
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"(horn honking) bevy!"
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"I could've been killed!"
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"Oh, poop!"
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"You ruined adam's jelly bean diorama of custer's last stand."
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"Poopies!"
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"That's it. I'm cleaning this whole place out."
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"No! Where am I gonna hide my six-pack of...Homework."
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"And the magazines I'm holding for a friend."
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"Hide it in the woods like every other kid!"
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"All this crap has got to go!"
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"It's not crap."
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"Every box is filled with priceless family memories,"
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"Each one more valuable than the next."
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"Bevy, we are drowning in our children's art projects."
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"You have literally kept every drawing, every doodle,"
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"Every macaroni necklace they have ever made."
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"Did you know that albert einstein's"
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"First macaroni necklace just sold for over $1 million?"
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"Einstein, huh?"
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"Which child would that be?"
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"Hey, bar?"
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"Ugh!"
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"Ew!"
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"¶ I'm twisted up inside"
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"¶ but nonetheless I feel the need to say"
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"¶ I don't know the future"
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"¶ but the past keeps getting clearer every day ¶"
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"Adult adam: It was January 7, 1980-something,"
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"And erica was finding a new and exciting way to torture us."
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"Ha! Look, it's barry's baby helmet."
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"No! I thought we gave that back to the institute."
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"You were so cute with your little flat head."
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"I used to rest my kool-aid on you."
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"Well, my head's perfectly round now."
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"Oh, my gosh. It's a picture of you all helmeted up."
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"This is gonna look great in the yearbook."
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"No, please, show mercy."
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"Adult adam: Yep, my sister had a gift for making our lives a living hell."
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"The more public the humiliation, the better."
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"Hey! (giggles)"
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"Why?"
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"You wore tear-away pants. This is on you."
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"(sing-songy) hey, adam."
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"Oh, balls!"
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"It's your potty pal, remember?"
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"Mom bought him for you because you thought monsters lived in the toilet."
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"They weren't monsters!"
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"They were toilet trolls."
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"(baby voice) aw, is pudgy wittle adam still too scared"
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"To make poo-poos now, huh?"
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"Oh, like you're so perfect with all your..."
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"Your trophies."
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"And your "a" papers,"
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"And your... Your framed commendation from the mayor?"
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"Seriously? Yeah, nice try."
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"Well, let's see what treasures lie in this box."
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"Nothing to see here, bye-bye."
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"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!"
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"It's an old box of your new kids on the block stuff."
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"You still love them."
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"(scoffs) no, I'm way too old to like boy bands."
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"Then I'll throw them away for you."
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"No! Don't touch them! They're mine!"
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"Adult adam: Yep, long before one direction and 'n sync,"
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"There was the original boy band..."
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"New kids on the block."
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"You still love the new kids. You're lame."
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"You love 'em. You're so lame."
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"No, you guys are lame sacks of..."
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"Just shut up!"
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"Damn it!"
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"She got away with all our ammo!"
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"Not all of it."
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"How? Sleight of hand."
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"And you thought magic camp was for dorks."
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"I still do, but good work."
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"After years of one-sided torture,"
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"We finally got some ammo."
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"Oh, hey, guys."
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"Adult adam: And it would change everything."
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"It's erica goldberg, your number one fan."
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"(laughs) and I wanted to make this video"
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"So that you could see firsthand how much I love you"
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"And wanna marry you. (giggles)"
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"But not all of you. Just you, jonathan."
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"In fact, I wrote a song about you."
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"So I'm gonna... I'm gonna sing it for you."
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"¶ jonny"
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"¶ jonny, jonny"
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"¶ I love you ¶"
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"(sobbing)"
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"I love you so much! (sobbing)"
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"I do! I... I love you!"
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"¶ I love you ¶"
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"(high-pitched voice) I love you so much!"
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"I always knew one day a good thing would happen to me."
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