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Clips from Teenage Bounty Hunters - Basically Pluto (S01E01)

"It's Yolanda."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Hello?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[Yolanda] Hey, girls."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Guess who landed his ass in jail?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Did you say in jail?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[soft rock music playing]"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[Sterling] Want more water?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Did they give you water? I heard they don't even give you water in jail."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I was in there 47 minutes, okay? I'm good."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[Blair] Why'd they even have the right to bring you in?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"What was the charge, loitering?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[Bowser sighs]"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I used colorful language"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"to remind them that police work is all just bullshit."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"And that they use the law"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"as retroactive justification for their bad decisions."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"That's what I told them."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"He called them "pigs"."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[both gasp]"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"-You really don't like cops. -Nope."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"That's why I left the force."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Wwwhat?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"You were a cop?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Do you want me to tell them?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"All right."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I was at the Tallahassee Gay Pride parade..."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"-You're gay? -[gasps]"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[chuckles] No, not gay."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I was assigned to protect Shelita Pancake,"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Florida's number one drag queen."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"First hour was cool."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I was with Officer Atticus..."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"behind a float."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Shelita was doing a death drop in a cat suit,"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"you know, basic parade shit."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Then I heard a car backfire."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"And I figure, here comes some crazy fool,"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"gonna shoot up the place."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"So, I pulled out my gun."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I guess I pulled it out too fast 'cause, uh..."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"the gun went off and shot Atticus in the nose."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"-You shot somebody? -You shot a cop?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"It was a horse."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Well, the horse was on the force."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"So, you shot a horse?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"A horse on the force."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"A horse on the force is a cop."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Of course."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"-Oh. -Anyway, he's fine."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Has half a mouth full of teeth,"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"and he's living on porridge."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[sighs]"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Pretty soon, there wasn't a squad room I could walk into"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"that wouldn't laugh me out."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"So, I quit."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I'm sorry, Bowser."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"C'mon, I'm fine."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I just wish we'd caught our skip, you know?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Mm. You and me both, Buster."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Now it's back to the fucking drawing board with that crazy bitch."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Wait, you guys, we could still salvage this case."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"John told me that the last time he saw Kendra"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"was a year ago in Knoxville."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"We could go there."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"That is just a hop, skip and a jump from Dollywood."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Oh, my God, and they have excellent funnel cakes! Please!"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Everybody calm down."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"We're not taking a field trip."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"-[both groan] -No."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Sometimes it's..."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"best if you just cut your losses and move on."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Trust me, I know."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Drive safe, kids."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Give him his space."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"That's not really our thing."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Well, it needs to be."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"When all this shit went down he didn't just quit his job,"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"he lost his marriage to my loca sister,"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"his reputation, his body..."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Dude fell apart."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"No. That's absurd."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[Yolanda] Yeah."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Anyway, y'all get the skip next time, will ya?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I don't do this shit for my health."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[Sterling sighs]"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Sorry."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I'm having an epiphany."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"We should order waffles, you're right."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"No."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"What if God put us here to fix Bowser?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I mean, like, to make him feel better about himself"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"so that he could, like, level up."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[sighs]"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Aw."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"I like that, that's sweet."
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"Right?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"-I'm in. -[sighs]"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"[Sterling] Did they leave us with the bill?"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"["Somebody Loves You" playing]"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Who’s around when the days feel long ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Who’s around when you can’t be strong ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Who’s around when you’re losing your mind ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Who thinks that you’re one of a kind ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Somebody misses you when you’re away ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ They wanna wake up with you everyday ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Somebody wants to hear you say ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Ooh somebody loves you ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Ooh somebody loves you ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Ooh somebody loves you ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Ooh somebody loves you ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Ooh somebody loves you ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ I’m around when your head is heavy ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ I’m around When your hands aren’t steady ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ I’m around When your day’s gone all wrong ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ I care that you feel at home ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Cause I know that you feel alone ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ I think you’re going to miss me When I’m gone ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Somebody misses you when you’re away ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ Ooh somebody loves you ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
"♪ You you you you you you you ♪"
Teenage Bounty Hunters
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