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Clips from The Great North - Slide & Wet-judice Adventure (S02E02)

"I was cursed for a few years. It seemed, like,"
The Great North
"you know, my house would burn down every time"
The Great North
"I left a candle burning indoors"
The Great North
"when I went out of town for the weekend."
The Great North
"Well, that seems a little different."
The Great North
"Well, h-how do you figure?"
The Great North
"Well, that just seems like you faced a consequence--"
The Great North
"your house burning down-- for a bad choice you made--"
The Great North
"leaving a candle burning indoors"
The Great North
"when you went out of town for the weekend."
The Great North
"That's not a curse."
The Great North
"Hey, hey, that's a new way of looking at it, now go on."
The Great North
"I mean, if my swim trunks kept falling off"
The Great North
"as a direct consequence of a bad choice I made,"
The Great North
"we'd be having a very different"
The Great North
"conversa... tion."
The Great North
"Don't go head first, your trunks will slide off."
The Great North
"Smell ya later, nerd-a-gators."
The Great North
"New Kids on the Crap! My trunks!"
The Great North
"Hey, get out of there. We're doing surf night,"
The Great North
"and the waves are turned way up."
The Great North
"- It'll rip your suit clean off. - Relax."
The Great North
"I know what I'm doing."
The Great North
"Oh, no! My trunks!"
The Great North
"Cool shirt."
The Great North
"Does it say "Pants Me, I Dare You"?"
The Great North
"Yeah. Oh, no."
The Great North
"My trunks."
The Great North
"Aw, man, water parks aren't cursed."
The Great North
"I'm just a ding-dang dumb-dumb,"
The Great North
"who's constantly ignoring fair warnings,"
The Great North
"jumping into things headfirst,"
The Great North
"and making bad T-shirt choices."
The Great North
"Even today, when I got stuck in the drainpipe"
The Great North
"under the road, I remember there was some kind of sign"
The Great North
"that said "warning" on it-- a literal warning sign--"
The Great North
"and I ignored it."
The Great North
"I should probably change my name to Goof Tobin."
The Great North
"It's only two letters different, so hopefully"
The Great North
"- it won't be very expensive. - Hey."
The Great North
"Don't be so hard on yourself, Wolfie."
The Great North
"Do you know how many skeletons my buddy and I had"
The Great North
"to just throw in the lake because we couldn't get"
The Great North
"the last bit of gunk off 'em?"
The Great North
"But eventually we figured out we got to mix a little bit"
The Great North
"of sulfuric acid in with the hydrofluoric acid."
The Great North
"And we haven't thrown a skeleton in the lake in years."
The Great North
"Because we learned from our mistakes."
The Great North
"Thanks, Neckbone. That's very inspirational."
The Great North
"I know. Now, let's get you to your family, okay?"
The Great North
"Here he come!"
The Great North
"Flush me to hell!"
The Great North
"Ah... Hello, Moon."
The Great North
"Oh. Hey, guys."
The Great North
"Do tell, did you manage to use your particular skill set"
The Great North
"to find any cheese for the nachos?"
The Great North
"Yes."
The Great North
"Well, you better call your make-believe lawyer,"
The Great North
"Olivia Objections, and tell her to meet you"
The Great North
"at the fantasy courthouse, because I'm about"
The Great North
"to get real litigious."
The Great North
"Come on, let's go find Dad and Honeybee"
The Great North
"and tear out of this wet fart."
The Great North
"Honeybee, we have to go. Where's Dad?"
The Great North
"Your father is lashed to a cement pole,"
The Great North
"but we can't leave before I meet--"
The Great North
"Who the hell is that idiot?"
The Great North
"You're not Jason Patric."
The Great North
"No, sorry. I'm Greg Dorp."
The Great North
"I'm just sitting here to let people know that Jason Patric"
The Great North
"had to cancel. He got a job in Atlanta,"
The Great North
"filming a Nescafé commercial,"
The Great North
"exclusively for the Greek Islands market."
The Great North
"Why didn't you make an announcement to everyone?"
The Great North
"Why are you telling people one on one?"
The Great North
"I'm also a grief counselor."
The Great North
"This is just how I do things."
The Great North
"Wolf was right-- this place is cursed."
The Great North
"Now let's get your dad and get the hell out of here."
The Great North
"Uh-oh."
The Great North
"Where did he go?"
The Great North
"Follow me."
The Great North
"♪ She'll be coming round the mountain when she comes... ♪"
The Great North
"The show is... not good."
The Great North
"They just keep singing "Comin' Round the Mountain,""
The Great North
"and the one in the back keeps arguing"
The Great North
"with someone on her cell phone."
The Great North
"And still, I would give them my boat,"
The Great North
"and my life, if they asked."
The Great North
"- Nope, time to go, Dad. - No!"
The Great North
"No. Leave me here."
The Great North
"Let me crash upon these shores."
The Great North
"Thanks for the ride, Neckbone."
The Great North
"And thank you for helping me to realize"
The Great North
"it's my own bad choices that are always getting me into trouble."
The Great North
"I let my fear of a dumb curse keep me"
The Great North
"from a day of fun with my family."
The Great North
"And that was the real curse."
The Great North
"Well, good luck out there, Wolf."
The Great North
"For a bunch of gunk on a skeleton,"
The Great North
"you're a pretty nice guy."
The Great North
"Wolf?!"
The Great North
"Family! Boy, am I happy to see you guys."
The Great North
"Babe, are you okay? What happened to you?"
The Great North
"It's a long story."
The Great North
"And we can't wait to hear all about it on the ride home,"
The Great North
"but let's get out of here."
The Great North
"You were right, Wolf, this place is cursed."
The Great North
"No, but that's the thing, I realized today"
The Great North
"the water park isn't cursed at all."
The Great North
"The reason everyone kept seeing my wiener"
The Great North
"is because of my own poor choices,"
The Great North
"not dumb luck or fate, or a curse, or--"
The Great North
"Oh. Oh, no!"
The Great North
"Oh, no!"
The Great North
"My trunks."
The Great North
"I never thought I'd say this,"
The Great North
"but windows down and middle fingers up."
The Great North
"And I mean everybody."
The Great North
"Aye-aye, Houston."
The Great North
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